WEBVTT

1
00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.680
How did it feel to have that period after 12 years?

2
00:00:03.680 --> 00:00:06.560
I felt so feminine and I felt quite emotional.

3
00:00:06.560 --> 00:00:08.640
It felt like very symbolically letting go of,

4
00:00:08.640 --> 00:00:13.680
but also just so hopeful because I'd also shut off from the idea of having children

5
00:00:13.680 --> 00:00:16.080
and then all of a sudden I was like, huh, there you go, I can.

6
00:00:17.200 --> 00:00:19.680
Can you tell me what the two conditions that you live with?

7
00:00:19.680 --> 00:00:23.840
Relative energy deficiency in sport and secondary hypotheramic amenorrhea.

8
00:00:23.840 --> 00:00:29.040
Now they are overlapping conditions, so secondary hypotheramic amenorrhea essentially means

9
00:00:29.040 --> 00:00:31.280
you've lost your period after it started.

10
00:00:31.280 --> 00:00:34.320
So you are in the midst of being a semi-fessional athlete.

11
00:00:34.320 --> 00:00:38.800
You've had periods, they've disappeared and you've maybe started to think, oh,

12
00:00:38.800 --> 00:00:40.480
that's a little bit weird, that's a little bit strange.

13
00:00:40.480 --> 00:00:42.720
What happens next for you?

14
00:00:42.720 --> 00:00:46.000
So the fact that that wasn't communicated to me by the doctors and they basically just said,

15
00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:47.760
go away, come back when you've stopped doing sport.

16
00:00:48.560 --> 00:00:51.840
You've talked about grief, you've used the word grief cry lot actually in this conversation.

17
00:00:51.840 --> 00:00:56.880
Did you feel like you had a lot of your teenage years or young adolescents taking away?

18
00:00:56.880 --> 00:00:59.280
Did you feel like there was a lot of loss surrounding?

19
00:00:59.280 --> 00:01:01.360
I think I definitely feel a loss.

20
00:01:07.440 --> 00:01:10.720
Ash, welcome to the Gale Chat, it's so nice to have you here.

21
00:01:10.720 --> 00:01:12.880
Thank you so much, I'm so excited to be here.

22
00:01:12.880 --> 00:01:17.840
I'm really excited for our chat because we have two conditions that I actually personally

23
00:01:17.840 --> 00:01:19.680
have not even heard of before.

24
00:01:19.680 --> 00:01:22.080
So when you reached out and you shared your story,

25
00:01:22.160 --> 00:01:27.280
I was really excited because I always want to introduce new conditions, new stories into

26
00:01:27.280 --> 00:01:31.760
this conversation because the community A will be really interested and we may have a lot of

27
00:01:31.760 --> 00:01:36.160
girls in the community already that potentially have it diagnosed or undiagnosed.

28
00:01:36.160 --> 00:01:41.120
Yeah, I think both of these conditions that we'll obviously chat about, they are actually

29
00:01:41.120 --> 00:01:45.840
so much more common or increasingly becoming so much more common and I remember when I first

30
00:01:45.840 --> 00:01:51.200
was diagnosed with them or not even really properly diagnosed for so long, they were really

31
00:01:51.200 --> 00:01:55.280
unspoken about and it's kind of getting there but they're still very much under the radar.

32
00:01:55.280 --> 00:01:56.720
Well, this is definitely the place for that.

33
00:01:56.720 --> 00:02:01.200
Yeah, we have, so that's one of the biggest things I think on the podcast is we need to talk

34
00:02:01.200 --> 00:02:03.440
about this more or we need to give this awareness.

35
00:02:03.440 --> 00:02:06.400
So can you tell me what are the two conditions that you live with?

36
00:02:06.400 --> 00:02:13.440
Yeah, so I'm actually recovered now, but very recently and actually the two conditions were

37
00:02:13.440 --> 00:02:18.400
relative energy deficiency and sport and secondary hypotheramic amenorrhea.

38
00:02:18.400 --> 00:02:24.560
Now, they are overlapping conditions, so secondary hypotheramic amenorrhea essentially means

39
00:02:24.560 --> 00:02:29.520
you've lost your period after it started, so you could have primary hypotheramic amenorrhea,

40
00:02:29.520 --> 00:02:34.640
which is where your period never began and then the secondary is if it stops after it has

41
00:02:35.280 --> 00:02:43.040
begun once and then reds is more specifically about a cause of hypotheramic amenorrhea,

42
00:02:43.040 --> 00:02:46.800
so it's the fact that you have lost your period as a result of an energy imbalance

43
00:02:47.440 --> 00:02:53.360
due to the fact that you are either over exercising or under eating and it predominantly was

44
00:02:53.360 --> 00:02:56.160
assumed to only affect elite athletes.

45
00:02:56.160 --> 00:03:01.760
I was training at a semi-professional level for sports, so that does apply to me,

46
00:03:01.760 --> 00:03:05.600
but actually increasingly and this is why it's such a problem that needs to be spoken about

47
00:03:06.240 --> 00:03:09.760
more and more especially young women are training like elite athletes now, you know,

48
00:03:09.760 --> 00:03:13.920
seeing this huge rise and running, it's pretty common place to run a marathon now,

49
00:03:13.920 --> 00:03:19.920
and that is training like an athlete, so as a result, more and more young women and young men

50
00:03:19.920 --> 00:03:24.960
can be affected by relative energy deficiency in sport and that can cause huge hormonal problems.

51
00:03:24.960 --> 00:03:31.440
Okay, fascinating, so like you mentioned, we've got, we've had two huge careers,

52
00:03:31.440 --> 00:03:36.400
all kind of chapters in your life in terms of semi-professional athletes and then you're now a journalist

53
00:03:36.960 --> 00:03:42.000
and women's half comes into both of those in very different ways, so to kind of get an

54
00:03:42.000 --> 00:03:46.800
understanding of what your life was like when these conditions came into it and were present,

55
00:03:46.800 --> 00:03:52.080
can you talk me through like what is a classic daily life routine for you when you were training as

56
00:03:52.080 --> 00:03:57.600
a semi-professional athlete? Yeah, so this all happened to me quite young, because I started my

57
00:03:57.600 --> 00:04:07.600
period when I think I was about 13, 14 and within a year it had gone again, so that's when I lost

58
00:04:07.840 --> 00:04:13.360
it and so I was training almost full time for sport, alongside trying to do school, you know,

59
00:04:13.360 --> 00:04:21.840
so I was training over 40 hours a week I would say, so maybe at that stage not quite, but it got

60
00:04:21.840 --> 00:04:27.920
to that point as I grew up, but I was training at least two to three hours a day after school,

61
00:04:29.040 --> 00:04:34.400
four to five days a week and then pretty much like a five hour session at the track on a Saturday,

62
00:04:34.400 --> 00:04:40.560
so you know we were oh my god, I was missing lessons by the time I got to sick form because I was

63
00:04:40.560 --> 00:04:49.520
having to go and train, so my day was like completely structured around exercise and because I was

64
00:04:49.520 --> 00:04:54.160
kind of coming from school going straight to the track, there was that classic lack of knowledge

65
00:04:54.160 --> 00:04:58.160
really about how I should be feeling my body because I was training like a professional athlete,

66
00:04:58.640 --> 00:05:05.040
but my body didn't have the recovery tools or you know the fueling because I wasn't just lying

67
00:05:05.040 --> 00:05:09.600
down between sessions, I was going to class and I was hanging out with my friends and all of that,

68
00:05:09.600 --> 00:05:15.120
so essentially I was trying to juggle being a normal teenager with training, you know,

69
00:05:15.120 --> 00:05:21.840
upwards of 30 hours, I just can't even wrap my head around, what that would like, yeah, yeah,

70
00:05:21.840 --> 00:05:25.840
like we all have memories of what our routine was like as a teenager and I remember I mean,

71
00:05:25.920 --> 00:05:31.040
I do live then to be Joseph, so I can caveat it with I know that fatigue was there even if I didn't

72
00:05:31.040 --> 00:05:35.600
realise it was there, but I just remember going to school and just feeling naturally tired and

73
00:05:35.600 --> 00:05:40.560
kind of thinking after a school day like oh I'm so excited to go and just like wind down or maybe

74
00:05:40.560 --> 00:05:46.240
play in the close or kind of just chill in the evening, but you were having full-time education,

75
00:05:46.240 --> 00:05:51.360
almost like a full-time career, yeah, yeah totally and it did become all-consuming and in an

76
00:05:51.360 --> 00:05:58.240
extremely positive but also I think slightly obsessive way, like you know I lost a lot of

77
00:05:58.240 --> 00:06:03.920
friends as I got older once I was around 16 and I became so serious about sport, I a lot of my

78
00:06:03.920 --> 00:06:08.720
friendships, I remember friends even calling me boring because I couldn't go to the social things

79
00:06:08.720 --> 00:06:14.160
and I chose that, that was my decision, but it is hard because you are dedicating your life to

80
00:06:14.160 --> 00:06:19.200
something at a very young age that's very different from the norm, yeah, um for context I did

81
00:06:19.440 --> 00:06:23.920
Heptathlon which is a seven different track and field events hence why I had to train so much.

82
00:06:23.920 --> 00:06:29.840
Oh my god. My seven events to fit in. So, walk me through those seven events, so on the first day

83
00:06:29.840 --> 00:06:37.040
you have hurdles, high jump, shopper and 200 and then you sleep overnight and then you come

84
00:06:37.040 --> 00:06:42.560
back the second day and you do long jump javelin, 800. Oh my god, yeah, you're like super woman,

85
00:06:43.280 --> 00:06:49.840
incredible, that's such a diverse range of skills as well, like you know being a professional

86
00:06:49.840 --> 00:06:53.840
like athlete like a track runner for whatever distance is is incredible especially when you

87
00:06:53.840 --> 00:07:00.240
watch the Olympics and things but to do seven different skill sets, it demands a lot on your body,

88
00:07:00.240 --> 00:07:06.320
yeah kind of for this conversation and the relevance to that is also obviously it's a highly

89
00:07:06.400 --> 00:07:12.880
image and weight-based sport so it's something like a high jump or a long jump, the lighter you are,

90
00:07:13.520 --> 00:07:18.400
the deemed benefit there is obviously when you're more educated and with a really good coach

91
00:07:18.400 --> 00:07:22.720
that understands they would be able to educate you on the fact that it's a very fine balance between

92
00:07:22.720 --> 00:07:28.560
being lighter and then not being strong, like really what you need to be strong, but obviously track

93
00:07:28.560 --> 00:07:34.080
athletes and Heptathes, they wear tiny little kit you know it's a little pants and a crop top

94
00:07:34.080 --> 00:07:38.160
and so you're very exposed at a very young age, you're looking at all these other girls who are

95
00:07:38.160 --> 00:07:45.120
maybe a bit older, they have shredded abs and ripped muscles and not a lot of body fat and

96
00:07:45.120 --> 00:07:49.360
it can really send you down a spiral especially as your body is changing and growing through puberty,

97
00:07:49.360 --> 00:07:52.960
yeah, you're not the finished product yet, you're not going to look like the 25 year old athlete

98
00:07:52.960 --> 00:07:59.200
you see on TV except I wanted to look like that so that's where it all feeds in and is complicated.

99
00:07:59.200 --> 00:08:02.720
There's a lot of layers there because you mentioned when you're explaining about the conditions

100
00:08:03.280 --> 00:08:09.040
that energy and you're coming back to school, missing classes, having busy schedules and I know

101
00:08:09.040 --> 00:08:12.880
for you there's a big relationship around food so how did that start to come in because you're

102
00:08:12.880 --> 00:08:18.160
talking about body image on the track with the tiny outfits and then your routine, yeah,

103
00:08:18.160 --> 00:08:23.520
what happened there. Yeah so I think like I'm saying about the kind of obsessiveness that happens is

104
00:08:23.520 --> 00:08:29.200
when you want to be really good at something you obviously kind of leave that no stone unturned

105
00:08:29.200 --> 00:08:33.120
mindset and the athlete mindset is very much like how can I be better, how can I win,

106
00:08:33.120 --> 00:08:38.880
how can my performance improve and because there is a real lack of education or there was when

107
00:08:38.880 --> 00:08:43.120
I was growing up and it's still pretty bad I think within young athletes and even in schools

108
00:08:43.680 --> 00:08:53.040
of what energy and strength and health looks like in my mind smaller and leaner would be better,

109
00:08:53.040 --> 00:09:00.240
like I would be better, so my issues around food initially stemmed from that drive for performance,

110
00:09:00.240 --> 00:09:06.880
I kind of associated eating less and getting leaner with the fact that I would become better at sport

111
00:09:06.880 --> 00:09:12.400
and I think in the short term there were times when that did improve and I did see gains

112
00:09:12.960 --> 00:09:18.880
but I also very quickly it became a psychological thing and a bit another level of a kind of obsession

113
00:09:18.880 --> 00:09:24.000
and compulsion and and even then when my performances were suffering I still wouldn't relate them

114
00:09:24.000 --> 00:09:29.440
back to the fact that maybe I wasn't feeling my body enough. Okay yeah the word control comes to

115
00:09:29.440 --> 00:09:34.000
mind as well when I hear you talking about it kind of you have to have control over your routine,

116
00:09:34.000 --> 00:09:39.680
control over your training obviously food and energy and nutrition come into that so that sounds

117
00:09:40.320 --> 00:09:44.800
very complicated for even a 30-year-old or someone in their 20s who's a professional athlete

118
00:09:45.440 --> 00:09:50.480
to comprehend all those things. For a young teenage girl that's going to puberty that just feels

119
00:09:50.480 --> 00:09:55.680
like a mind-filled. Well totally exactly yeah and I think because there isn't there isn't the

120
00:09:55.680 --> 00:10:02.960
education and athletics lacks a lot of funding okay so unlike maybe a football academy program or

121
00:10:02.960 --> 00:10:07.600
something where there would be the whole support network around it in athletics you generally unless

122
00:10:07.600 --> 00:10:12.960
you're on a really high performance pathway will just have your coach so they don't necessarily

123
00:10:12.960 --> 00:10:17.360
know they know how to educate you on stuff so you're not being monitored you're not being

124
00:10:17.360 --> 00:10:21.680
checked no one's asking about your period no one's asking about the fact that you've dropped way

125
00:10:21.680 --> 00:10:26.480
or what you're eating it's not really addressed so the problem can kind of fall under the radar.

126
00:10:27.120 --> 00:10:31.600
Gosh that is not something that I ever as a completely like outside person with no knowledge

127
00:10:31.600 --> 00:10:35.600
of this world whatsoever you would just make that presumption that if you're going down that

128
00:10:35.600 --> 00:10:40.160
professional pathway of any kind of sport yeah especially at a young age because it feels like

129
00:10:40.160 --> 00:10:46.640
that's such an important time to nurture someone in all areas of nutrition and physio and psychology

130
00:10:46.640 --> 00:10:50.640
and all those things but okay so it's just you and your coach yeah I mean eating disorders

131
00:10:50.640 --> 00:10:58.240
are a rife in track and field really 100% wow is it more women the men or because it is quite

132
00:10:58.240 --> 00:11:03.200
gender diverse I think it is I my understanding was that it was always very gendered okay

133
00:11:04.080 --> 00:11:08.000
increasingly on social media I'm seeing a few more male athletes come out and talk about

134
00:11:08.080 --> 00:11:14.880
reds actually and talk about especially in distance running because they very much have to be lighter

135
00:11:14.880 --> 00:11:20.320
or that's their kind of feeling and that underfueling is a huge problem in men as well but I think

136
00:11:20.880 --> 00:11:26.800
it's still a gendered thing for sure wow yeah okay we're going to hold this here and then just

137
00:11:27.280 --> 00:11:32.480
quickly while we're talking about you in your teenage years you mentioned obviously you had you

138
00:11:32.480 --> 00:11:36.560
started your periods but you only had a year or so of appearance so what were they like when

139
00:11:36.560 --> 00:11:43.920
you did have them so they were light for sure and they weren't super regular but that's pretty normal

140
00:11:43.920 --> 00:11:48.080
I think when you're first starting your periods it has its settles yeah so I definitely you know

141
00:11:48.080 --> 00:11:53.360
I had consistent periods they maybe weren't exactly on the month as they should be but yeah they were

142
00:11:53.360 --> 00:11:57.600
there they were present I figured out how to use a tampon do you know what I mean it wasn't like

143
00:11:57.600 --> 00:12:02.240
I had one and then it was gone yeah so yeah but they were I never had problematic periods I wouldn't

144
00:12:02.240 --> 00:12:06.160
say okay yeah so once you kind of hit that stage of your life you're thinking right we're going to

145
00:12:06.160 --> 00:12:09.200
get like all teenage guys we're going to get to grips with this we're going to learn what this

146
00:12:09.200 --> 00:12:14.400
means for me yeah what was was that thought process what was your reaction when they disappeared

147
00:12:14.400 --> 00:12:20.560
or was that maybe a delayed response for you a hugely delayed response because initially first I

148
00:12:20.560 --> 00:12:26.640
mean at that stage again it all comes back to the lack of education because I definitely wasn't

149
00:12:26.640 --> 00:12:30.480
tracking my periods or anything like that so they've just like pop up every now and then I'd be like

150
00:12:30.720 --> 00:12:36.160
god right okay and then so when they kind of went I wasn't even thinking about it and I was like

151
00:12:36.160 --> 00:12:40.960
no like whatever didn't really notice didn't really notice probably wasn't like till in a year

152
00:12:40.960 --> 00:12:47.120
after they would gone that I was like that is really weird like I haven't had a period in ages

153
00:12:47.120 --> 00:12:52.080
but then again wasn't really bothered because I was kind of like this is so convenient and

154
00:12:52.080 --> 00:12:55.920
that was the problem is that it's like all my friends are having to deal with tampons like

155
00:12:56.640 --> 00:13:01.040
they're having to compete on their periods like I don't want to compete on my period it makes me

156
00:13:01.040 --> 00:13:08.000
bloated it's in like it makes you more tired you have to worry about bleeding through when you're

157
00:13:08.000 --> 00:13:12.240
not wearing very much yeah one of those things that was like this is perfect I don't have to deal

158
00:13:12.240 --> 00:13:18.160
with this so at first I honestly didn't even consider that it was a problem yeah as you were literally

159
00:13:18.160 --> 00:13:22.000
saying that I literally was thinking god in some ways I can see that being so convenient when

160
00:13:22.000 --> 00:13:28.480
your pure focus is I am going to win get better get stronger be quicker whatever it might be

161
00:13:29.680 --> 00:13:33.440
and you know I think for loads of women even when you go through a journey probably

162
00:13:33.440 --> 00:13:36.960
similar to what you've been through what I've been through when you get older I have a very

163
00:13:36.960 --> 00:13:41.600
different relationship with my body now my period and I love what that part of my body is doing

164
00:13:41.600 --> 00:13:45.920
why it's so important but you know for a long time I think all of us can relate to that like

165
00:13:45.920 --> 00:13:51.680
oh really like it happens when you're socialising or when you've got a nice thing going on or you're

166
00:13:51.680 --> 00:13:54.960
going on a holiday that always happens for me yeah like when you're going a holiday you just think

167
00:13:54.960 --> 00:13:59.920
oh what a pain I know like can you just not can you just not do this this week so totally and I

168
00:13:59.920 --> 00:14:05.360
think that's kind of at the core of you know unniably our periods can be a bit of a pain in the

169
00:14:05.360 --> 00:14:11.680
bum but I think the fact that we have had that perception of them has almost made us not pay

170
00:14:11.680 --> 00:14:15.680
attention to them in the way that we should like we now know that it's like the fifth vital sign of

171
00:14:15.680 --> 00:14:19.920
health but like I didn't think of it in that way at all I just thought this is a really annoying

172
00:14:19.920 --> 00:14:25.520
thing that happens every month like I didn't consider understand what it was doing and what I was

173
00:14:25.520 --> 00:14:32.240
then liking absolutely and you're right we are now moving towards a time when we're thinking God

174
00:14:32.240 --> 00:14:37.760
this life sign like you say this health sign is incredible and we can learn so much from it and

175
00:14:37.760 --> 00:14:42.640
we're looking at whether it can detect cervical cancer whether we can potentially diagnose

176
00:14:42.640 --> 00:14:49.120
endometriosis using a menstrual blood but that is a long road isn't it changing our relationship

177
00:14:49.280 --> 00:14:55.840
with our period huge hugely long road yeah agreed okay so you are in the midst of being a

178
00:14:55.840 --> 00:15:01.440
semi-fessional athlete you've had periods they've disappeared and you've maybe started to think oh

179
00:15:01.440 --> 00:15:06.400
that's a little bit weird that's a little bit strange yeah what happens next for you yeah so it

180
00:15:06.400 --> 00:15:11.440
was actually my mum and I'm super grateful that she she was very invested in my athletics career

181
00:15:11.440 --> 00:15:17.440
and it was her who said I'm worried about like your bone health because I had a stress fracture

182
00:15:17.440 --> 00:15:25.920
or stress injury around the age of 15-16 oh wow my foot and stress responses and injuries are

183
00:15:25.920 --> 00:15:34.320
often a result of a overtraining but also a lack of bone like density and when you don't have a

184
00:15:34.320 --> 00:15:41.280
period it's often related to a lack of estrogen yes and that is what can contribute ultimately to

185
00:15:41.280 --> 00:15:48.080
osteoporosis which is brittle bones which is such a dangerous condition that often affects women

186
00:15:48.080 --> 00:15:52.560
in menopause so you wouldn't associate it with teenage girls but it is a problem and actually

187
00:15:52.560 --> 00:15:58.640
there was a very high profile runner called Bobby Clay who did amazing amazing work for raising

188
00:15:58.640 --> 00:16:05.120
awareness around reds at the time because she had osteoporosis so she was an amazing distance

189
00:16:05.120 --> 00:16:09.680
runner but she was chronically underfueled and then she developed osteoporosis as a result

190
00:16:09.680 --> 00:16:14.720
and she I can't remember how many fractures she had but so many oh my god and in the end of her

191
00:16:14.720 --> 00:16:21.440
career ended because of it so I think seeing Bobby's story and then my mum also raising the kind

192
00:16:21.440 --> 00:16:29.040
of alarm bells meant that we went to the doctors about it and we requested a dexascan which tests

193
00:16:29.040 --> 00:16:36.560
your bone density yeah and I think they said yes on that occasion and I did have one but because

194
00:16:36.560 --> 00:16:41.280
it was so sort of new and at this stage I was only about 15 so I had only lost my period for a

195
00:16:41.280 --> 00:16:48.400
year I think my bone density came back within range but that's not to say it wasn't getting worse

196
00:16:48.400 --> 00:16:53.280
and I think that's where the lack of education and even in the medical teams was they didn't flag it

197
00:16:53.280 --> 00:16:57.360
they were just like your bone densities fine go away and they were just doing a lot of sport

198
00:16:58.240 --> 00:17:02.240
periods go when you do a lot of sport they'll come back when they when you stop doing sport

199
00:17:02.240 --> 00:17:07.840
and that's really bad advice because that's awful advice and because it was so normalized at the

200
00:17:07.840 --> 00:17:12.480
time that athletes lose their period but it's actually not a normal thing it's a sign that your

201
00:17:12.480 --> 00:17:17.840
body is saying essentially we don't have enough energy to house a baby right now so we're going

202
00:17:17.840 --> 00:17:24.560
to switch off your reproductive system to focus on survival and movement you know it's the things

203
00:17:24.560 --> 00:17:30.640
that you need to keep functioning and pregnancy is not deemed as an essential thing for functioning

204
00:17:30.640 --> 00:17:34.640
so that's why your body switches it off so the fact that that wasn't communicated to me by the

205
00:17:34.640 --> 00:17:37.520
doctors and they basically just said go away come back when you've stopped doing sport

206
00:17:38.480 --> 00:17:42.880
meant that I then walked away for another two or three years and didn't do anything about it

207
00:17:42.880 --> 00:17:48.560
wow and then I went back a second time and we were kind of like look they still haven't come back

208
00:17:48.560 --> 00:17:54.400
we are a bit concerned about this like it's it's not normal and it's not good and their answer

209
00:17:54.480 --> 00:18:03.600
was basically we'll go on the pill then oh yeah which I know is a solution to every female health

210
00:18:03.600 --> 00:18:08.000
problem I know I thought I've heard the pill use for every possible scenario but know that's

211
00:18:08.000 --> 00:18:12.880
even a new one the whole concern and the whole point of the appointment is I don't have a period

212
00:18:12.880 --> 00:18:18.000
and I think I should yeah and their responses go on the pill yeah which is definitely not going

213
00:18:18.000 --> 00:18:22.400
to bring a period back okay it might add a withdrawal bleed exactly but it also might not but

214
00:18:22.400 --> 00:18:26.720
that's still not a period exactly and that's the bit that again wasn't communicated that it's

215
00:18:26.720 --> 00:18:31.600
that's all withdrawal bleed not actually this is basically a sticking plaster over a wound because

216
00:18:31.600 --> 00:18:37.360
it makes you think oh I'm bleeding all good but actually it's not it's artificial hormones

217
00:18:37.360 --> 00:18:41.840
yes rather than your body actually producing the hormones that it's supposed to be producing

218
00:18:41.840 --> 00:18:46.480
so I went on the pill and then I came off the pill again because it made me gain weight

219
00:18:46.560 --> 00:18:51.840
and obviously I was doing sports so I was like I don't like that it also I didn't feel great

220
00:18:51.840 --> 00:18:56.880
mentally on it so I just started to struggle with like depression on the pill and you can try

221
00:18:56.880 --> 00:19:02.000
different ones but ultimately so I went on it for a few months came back off it and they were like

222
00:19:02.000 --> 00:19:06.240
well if you don't want to go on the pill we can't really help you anymore so I again then just

223
00:19:06.240 --> 00:19:14.160
sort of went away again good at the time I think I then went back a third time a couple of years

224
00:19:14.160 --> 00:19:21.520
later and they tested my blood markers and my hormones and it came back that my estrogen levels

225
00:19:21.520 --> 00:19:29.040
were close to zero so my estrogen was in the pits which explains a lot because estrogen

226
00:19:29.680 --> 00:19:34.000
plays such a key role in like mood energy and I was really struggling with a lot of that on the

227
00:19:34.000 --> 00:19:39.680
track my performances were starting to plateau and I think essentially I was pretty exhausted and my

228
00:19:39.680 --> 00:19:47.760
body wasn't functioning as it should I'm not surprised like how like that's several so many years

229
00:19:47.760 --> 00:19:52.400
of intense training yeah and like you say it's almost like if you look at a graph things were

230
00:19:52.400 --> 00:19:56.480
just continuously going downhill weren't they like the amount of estrogen you were having yeah

231
00:19:56.480 --> 00:20:02.320
bone density all those things were just declining and understandably the doctors had just said like

232
00:20:02.320 --> 00:20:07.440
oh don't worry about it so you just gone away and tried to carry on right yeah exactly because

233
00:20:07.440 --> 00:20:12.560
at that stage it's hard to advocate for yourself I think especially like when you're not you don't

234
00:20:12.560 --> 00:20:18.400
know so you're like if a doctor's telling you this is the thing you just say okay then I went

235
00:20:18.400 --> 00:20:23.760
worried about it yeah and it wasn't until I did go to I went to Loughborough University which is

236
00:20:23.760 --> 00:20:28.160
really amazing for sport and I had the opportunity to work with a female nutritionist called Louise

237
00:20:28.160 --> 00:20:33.440
Bloor who was absolutely brilliant she was a format athlete herself and it was her who first

238
00:20:33.440 --> 00:20:39.120
sort of gave me the term reds in relation to myself rather than having heard it around like Bobby

239
00:20:39.120 --> 00:20:44.320
Clay's story and stuff like that she said to me I think you're under eating and she's I think

240
00:20:44.320 --> 00:20:50.640
you could have reds and it was the first time that someone like sort of gave me that term

241
00:20:50.640 --> 00:20:56.000
because I think my mind had started to be thinking maybe but when you have problems around eating

242
00:20:56.000 --> 00:21:00.640
and fueling I think you gaslight yourself and then if a doctor's also telling you this could be

243
00:21:00.640 --> 00:21:04.080
pretty normal yeah you're definitely like I'm not going to say that I've got a problem but I

244
00:21:04.080 --> 00:21:11.520
was saying that could be a problem was I think a switch in my brain okay and start of a long road

245
00:21:11.520 --> 00:21:17.280
but definitely a change in the direction and I think that's why it's so important that we always

246
00:21:17.280 --> 00:21:21.040
when we're worried about somebody else or we think something about somebody else it's important

247
00:21:21.040 --> 00:21:27.200
to raise it gently with them yeah why do you think that landed with you differently to other

248
00:21:27.200 --> 00:21:32.080
things that you'd seen what was it about her saying it to you that landed differently I think

249
00:21:32.080 --> 00:21:38.080
well A obviously she was educated in the space but B she was talking directly to me and she was

250
00:21:38.080 --> 00:21:44.320
facing things head on whereas obviously I'd you know late night google things and yeah heard other

251
00:21:44.320 --> 00:21:49.680
people's stories but it was like am I allowed to like own this am I allowed to like say that this

252
00:21:49.680 --> 00:21:55.680
is my story when I don't know and people are telling me other things that like it seems like it's okay

253
00:21:56.400 --> 00:22:04.400
whereas her just being straight up with me and you know calmly gently not accusingly but

254
00:22:04.400 --> 00:22:10.400
supportively saying this could be something and also because she was very clear as how this would

255
00:22:10.400 --> 00:22:14.880
improve my performance if I actually feel myself better so there was that element too which I

256
00:22:14.880 --> 00:22:20.080
think is important especially for anyone that's kind of sporty or training for a goal or whatever

257
00:22:20.080 --> 00:22:23.280
whatever your goal is whether it's to have children and you're thinking about your fertility if

258
00:22:23.280 --> 00:22:28.080
somebody says to you actually this is going to increase your chances of having children then

259
00:22:28.080 --> 00:22:32.400
you're going to be motivated or this is going to decrease your pain or anything so I think it's

260
00:22:32.400 --> 00:22:37.440
linking it to the positive outcome that could come is important yeah definitely and it's it's

261
00:22:37.440 --> 00:22:40.720
interesting when I hear you talk about your relationship with her because it makes you think of

262
00:22:40.720 --> 00:22:46.320
like the role of authority because in lots of ways you had two very significant conversations with

263
00:22:46.320 --> 00:22:51.040
someone in a role of authority but they ended very differently so the doctor was authority

264
00:22:51.040 --> 00:22:54.960
and understandably you trusted them like we all do and they said don't worry about it just leave

265
00:22:54.960 --> 00:23:00.320
it and move on so you did but then on the other end of the spectrum you had someone that you

266
00:23:00.320 --> 00:23:06.160
respected and maybe admired and also was an expert and authority who said actually no I'm going to

267
00:23:06.160 --> 00:23:12.400
have a personal conversation tailored to you and taught you like as an individual which feels like

268
00:23:12.400 --> 00:23:17.280
is missing from so many medical conversations I agree yeah there's that like persons entered

269
00:23:17.360 --> 00:23:22.640
approach and because I guess you know there's obviously constraints on resources and everything but

270
00:23:22.640 --> 00:23:30.320
there is this kind of rushed generic yeah stick a plaster on it attitude which I think just rushes

271
00:23:30.320 --> 00:23:35.600
you out the room and then you kind of leave still pretty unsure about what you were just told

272
00:23:35.600 --> 00:23:39.840
yeah definitely even when you get your blood markers like often I mean I've had so many blood

273
00:23:39.840 --> 00:23:44.960
tests and I can't even interpret them and like somebody doesn't even like call you or anything

274
00:23:44.960 --> 00:23:47.920
and you're like I don't even know what that means you just gave me that all that information

275
00:23:47.920 --> 00:23:51.920
what do I do there yeah yeah I remember having my blood work like the most recent one that I did

276
00:23:51.920 --> 00:23:55.280
I just got kind of a general across the board done just to kind of see because I came off

277
00:23:55.280 --> 00:23:59.600
contraception for the first time in a long time and obviously I'm interested so I like Google

278
00:23:59.600 --> 00:24:03.680
things and kind of learn and try and do a bit more kind of learning around nutrition things

279
00:24:03.680 --> 00:24:09.200
but I'm looking at these bars on like the NHS that way you know you have a range of where your like

280
00:24:09.200 --> 00:24:14.000
ferritin is and different things and I'm looking at this bar going okay well that's a huge bar

281
00:24:14.000 --> 00:24:18.800
and I'm in the bar but I'm towards like the lower end of it is that a problem or I'm towards the

282
00:24:18.800 --> 00:24:25.680
higher you know and there's no explanation around how good of a guide is the bar yes at all yeah

283
00:24:25.680 --> 00:24:29.920
as a range is that is should that change is that different to functional medicine or whatever

284
00:24:30.640 --> 00:24:35.280
and what it means for you you know there's no discussion around that no discussion and also what I

285
00:24:35.280 --> 00:24:40.240
now know is that your hormone levels obviously changed throughout the month so yeah I was tested at

286
00:24:40.240 --> 00:24:44.240
one point in my estrogen levels or one place and actually maybe if I was testing another point in

287
00:24:44.240 --> 00:24:48.960
the month but they've been different I don't know like it's so there's so much confusion around it

288
00:24:48.960 --> 00:24:55.200
and that's it's all the new ones that's often lost yeah yeah you mentioned disordered eating so

289
00:24:55.200 --> 00:24:59.360
when you went to GP appointments during all those years where you're kind of thinking something

290
00:24:59.360 --> 00:25:04.240
might be going wrong but you're not quite sure did that come up did you talk about that was it

291
00:25:04.240 --> 00:25:12.320
asked about no and this is a really interesting thing that I think is a theme so in my young years

292
00:25:13.120 --> 00:25:18.720
the disordered eating I think you would definitely categorize it now as orthorexia so it's a

293
00:25:18.720 --> 00:25:24.720
obsession with healthy eating so because I was an athlete I wouldn't have described myself as

294
00:25:24.720 --> 00:25:30.800
anorexic like other people would be I wouldn't look emaciated and I wasn't technically

295
00:25:30.800 --> 00:25:36.400
underweight from a BMI perspective because I was very muscular okay but I think from a body fat

296
00:25:36.400 --> 00:25:42.000
perspective if that I've been investigated further it is a disorder it is a disordered eating

297
00:25:42.000 --> 00:25:46.240
pattern but it doesn't present in quite the same way somebody can look very healthy and muscular

298
00:25:46.240 --> 00:25:52.640
okay and actually their body fat percentages off and their energy resources are off okay it was only

299
00:25:53.280 --> 00:25:59.920
after I stopped sport eventually and my period still didn't return and due to some like family

300
00:25:59.920 --> 00:26:06.080
I think honestly the grief of like letting my sport career go but also a lot of issues at home

301
00:26:06.080 --> 00:26:13.200
with family stress and a kind of dorm and eating disorder that then just like through itself up

302
00:26:13.200 --> 00:26:18.480
because it was the way to control okay and I became very thin and I think looking back I was

303
00:26:18.480 --> 00:26:25.200
definitely extremely underweight at that time yeah um that is the only time that a doctor ever once said

304
00:26:26.160 --> 00:26:31.600
and it was when I went for my like smear test yeah she was like do you think you should think

305
00:26:31.600 --> 00:26:37.520
about gaining some weight and but that was the closest anyone ever came to saying anything

306
00:26:37.520 --> 00:26:44.000
but just that yeah other thing yeah other than some friends addressed it with me because they

307
00:26:44.000 --> 00:26:48.960
care about me and my dad tried to gently approach it but bless them like it's a hard thing for a

308
00:26:48.960 --> 00:26:56.640
dad to have that conversation about definitely um but in terms of doctors no and the the thing

309
00:26:56.640 --> 00:27:01.120
that I think is the reason for that is that when I went back to the doctor again after I stopped

310
00:27:01.120 --> 00:27:05.520
sport about my period because I was like right well I've now stopped doing competitive sport I'm

311
00:27:05.520 --> 00:27:10.320
not training excessively why have they not come back yeah not addressing the fact that I was

312
00:27:10.320 --> 00:27:16.320
clearly very underweight I should have I did no deep down but I was ignoring it um and I went

313
00:27:16.400 --> 00:27:22.080
back to the doctors and at this stage I think it was post-COVID so all GP appointments that I was having

314
00:27:22.080 --> 00:27:28.240
what I was over the phone so she didn't ask my height my weights she'd never seen me in real life

315
00:27:28.240 --> 00:27:34.160
this GP because she was a new GP okay and she referred me for an internal ultrasound so I went

316
00:27:34.160 --> 00:27:39.680
for an internal ultrasound which obviously you have no consultation there they just do it no then

317
00:27:39.680 --> 00:27:44.880
the results went back to her and she called me and she was like you've got PCOS and I was like

318
00:27:45.840 --> 00:27:50.720
I really don't think I do because at this point I'm a journalist too I'm writing in women's

319
00:27:50.720 --> 00:27:57.920
house so I know the symptoms of PCOS which include you know weight gain acne excessive hair

320
00:27:57.920 --> 00:28:03.280
yeah I didn't have any of those symptoms the only symptoms that I had was I'm lacking a period

321
00:28:03.760 --> 00:28:09.360
and I do have cysts or some cysts on my ovaries but as we now know by the renaming of

322
00:28:09.680 --> 00:28:16.160
yes to PMOS yeah it's not necessarily just an ovarian cyst related condition and you can have

323
00:28:16.160 --> 00:28:24.160
cysts without having PCOS yeah so I actually just really didn't believe the diagnosis because I

324
00:28:24.160 --> 00:28:29.040
also knew that I had so many issues around food that I wasn't talking about and she'd never seen

325
00:28:29.040 --> 00:28:35.360
me so she also didn't know so I had this phone call and I was like okay and after she hung up

326
00:28:35.360 --> 00:28:42.400
she never contacted me again she didn't follow up on anything relating to if I had had PMOS

327
00:28:42.400 --> 00:28:50.480
no treatment plan no nothing and nothing and I just didn't even though I was motivated to solve the

328
00:28:50.480 --> 00:28:56.800
problem I think I still wasn't taking my health seriously enough and I still was a bit like honestly

329
00:28:56.800 --> 00:29:02.560
I quite like not having a period so I was kind of one foot in trying to get better and one foot

330
00:29:02.560 --> 00:29:07.920
still firmly out yeah so that was the problem and that's such the psychological element of this

331
00:29:07.920 --> 00:29:12.880
and I think we'll be affecting so many other women that I know are going through and that have

332
00:29:12.880 --> 00:29:17.200
spoken to me about it since I've recovered and spoken about it yeah so many women have

333
00:29:17.200 --> 00:29:21.840
gotten attached to me and they're like I want to recover but then I'm also like hooked in this disorder

334
00:29:21.840 --> 00:29:28.480
yeah and I can't recover we're taking a quick break to say thank you to today's sponsor BU period

335
00:29:28.480 --> 00:29:33.120
when it comes to women's health I'm obsessed with all things holistic and natural my go-to

336
00:29:33.120 --> 00:29:39.040
product is BU's pain relief patches the combination of menthol and eucalyptus is pure bliss

337
00:29:39.040 --> 00:29:44.560
when an endo flare hits whether it's pelvic pain back pain leg pain or anything else they give me

338
00:29:44.560 --> 00:29:49.360
the instant and long lasting relief I need and you can even set up your own subscriptions that you

339
00:29:49.360 --> 00:29:53.760
never run out of natural pain relief if you want to get your hands on BU's patches you can find a

340
00:29:53.760 --> 00:29:59.200
link in the show notes and make sure you use the code in jab 10 to get your exclusive list of

341
00:29:59.200 --> 00:30:05.360
discount now let's get back to the girl chat wow yeah okay I mean I can't wait to talk about that

342
00:30:05.360 --> 00:30:10.400
because of the psychology element let me say it's huge that's big but okay so for the timeline

343
00:30:10.400 --> 00:30:15.040
purpose so you had that conversation at Loughborough which kind of put reds on the radar for you

344
00:30:15.040 --> 00:30:20.240
yeah how many years after that was it that you actually stopped sport about two and a half

345
00:30:20.800 --> 00:30:26.320
okay yeah so then you stop professional sports yeah and then left it a little while then you

346
00:30:26.320 --> 00:30:30.000
went back to the doctor because you were like oh they told me this would fix it yeah and nothing

347
00:30:30.000 --> 00:30:37.280
is kind of happening yeah okay weird PCOS diagnosis that did all yeah PMOS now that didn't sit

348
00:30:37.280 --> 00:30:43.040
right with you yeah next steps after that what happened for you pretty disillusioned by this point

349
00:30:43.040 --> 00:30:48.320
with healthcare yeah I was kind of like I think I've been to the doctors now four times about this

350
00:30:48.880 --> 00:30:56.160
four different outcomes and none of them have worked and none of them feel right and so I think

351
00:30:56.160 --> 00:31:02.320
for a while I just thought I can't bothered yeah and I was like I honestly at that stage I was

352
00:31:02.320 --> 00:31:07.680
about 23 and I remember sitting in my bed and being like okay well I'm just not going to have children

353
00:31:07.680 --> 00:31:11.040
I think that's probably like what this is going to be for me my periods never going to come back

354
00:31:11.600 --> 00:31:15.520
maybe I've gone through early menopause I was just like I kind of think that's it and I kind of

355
00:31:15.520 --> 00:31:22.000
made peace with that which is like crazy like for some of that young age to not think that their

356
00:31:22.000 --> 00:31:27.200
health is worth investigating further but I think it was a combination of that kind of just felt

357
00:31:27.200 --> 00:31:36.720
very dismissed felt like no one and I also felt trapped in the kind of cycle of eating disorders

358
00:31:36.720 --> 00:31:42.720
okay and I felt like no one was there to help me even though they were even though I had friends

359
00:31:42.800 --> 00:31:47.760
and family who would have if I had asked for help would have jumped straight to my help yes but

360
00:31:47.760 --> 00:31:51.680
from a medical side of things I think when I'm quite passionate about the fact that when people are

361
00:31:51.680 --> 00:31:57.840
quite young they sometimes need someone to like grab their hand and do it for them they can't do

362
00:31:57.840 --> 00:32:02.800
it themselves especially when it's such a psychological condition that yeah like an eating disorder that's

363
00:32:02.800 --> 00:32:06.800
this other voice in your head that you've got your rational voice going I should get help

364
00:32:06.800 --> 00:32:11.280
about this and this other little like devil on your shoulder is like no this is what you like this

365
00:32:11.280 --> 00:32:16.160
is what's keeping you happy this is what's keeping you in control so I was kind of just I should

366
00:32:16.160 --> 00:32:22.560
just shut off from it for a few years basically it sounds very isolating to have an eating disorder

367
00:32:22.560 --> 00:32:29.840
sounds like a very lonely space to be in yeah I think so definitely especially when it has been so

368
00:32:29.840 --> 00:32:35.040
like insidious which I think it can be for some people that develop an eating disorder in their

369
00:32:35.040 --> 00:32:40.240
teenage years and it's very abrupt and it becomes anorexia or something very quickly yeah it's

370
00:32:40.240 --> 00:32:46.080
often like picked up by parents and it's dealt with quite acutely but in something like reds

371
00:32:46.080 --> 00:32:54.000
anorexia and sport it happens kind of slowly and it under the guise of health and performance

372
00:32:54.000 --> 00:32:58.560
yeah and like you're doing this for like a good reason so then it's confusing because you're like

373
00:32:58.560 --> 00:33:02.960
am I like how did this become bad when I thought it was healthy yeah and I think that's that's

374
00:33:02.960 --> 00:33:07.920
the really confusing thing and that's the problem I'm seeing so much now in the running space

375
00:33:08.000 --> 00:33:13.120
in the running world not just with teenagers but especially women in their 20s I mean people

376
00:33:13.120 --> 00:33:17.120
all over my social media feeds yeah I'm looking at them and I'm like oh my god this is a red flag

377
00:33:17.120 --> 00:33:24.240
like this is not good they look underfueled they look like their borderline eating disorder but

378
00:33:24.240 --> 00:33:28.560
it's so borderline because they're still muskly and they're still training and it can just get

379
00:33:28.560 --> 00:33:33.840
masked and masked and you mentioned mathins before you see that a lot with because the marathon

380
00:33:33.840 --> 00:33:39.680
running and training seems very trendy popular right now and you know amazing that more women are

381
00:33:39.680 --> 00:33:46.000
going into sport running marathons you know I saw a post the other day when someone had done the

382
00:33:46.000 --> 00:33:49.360
marathon the London marathon they talked about you know it was only so many years ago that women

383
00:33:49.360 --> 00:33:53.840
were banned from doing this how amazing that we can now do it and you know the progress but yeah

384
00:33:53.840 --> 00:33:58.640
it seems like with all social media things trends happen yeah so is that kind of going on at the

385
00:33:58.640 --> 00:34:03.040
moment yeah I think the huge danger with I think it's so wonderful that more people are running

386
00:34:03.040 --> 00:34:09.840
but a marathon is it's not a recreational distance it's an elite athlete distance and anyone that

387
00:34:09.840 --> 00:34:14.400
is putting their body through that much training needs to also be matching it with the lifestyle

388
00:34:14.400 --> 00:34:19.280
that surrounds an elite athlete so that is really great sleep really great fueling really great

389
00:34:19.280 --> 00:34:25.040
hydration really good like muscular recovery stretching strength training all of those things that

390
00:34:25.040 --> 00:34:31.600
surround an athlete that's training for a marathon has to be applied but because it's sprung up

391
00:34:31.600 --> 00:34:36.000
as a really quick trend and people aren't surrounded by these support systems and they don't

392
00:34:36.000 --> 00:34:41.360
have the education of an athlete a lot of the time they just do the running bit yes or they maybe

393
00:34:41.360 --> 00:34:48.240
do the strength training bit because they've seen that but the fueling bit because of I think female

394
00:34:48.240 --> 00:34:52.960
issues around body images well that play into it a little bit but also just lack of education

395
00:34:53.520 --> 00:34:58.640
you can very quickly slip down the road of under fueling unintentionally and then it just

396
00:34:59.280 --> 00:35:03.760
gets hold of you and then it can be a problem there's a really amazing sports dietician called

397
00:35:03.760 --> 00:35:09.120
Reenie McGregor and I would kind of urge anybody that is listening to this and relating or

398
00:35:09.120 --> 00:35:13.920
things they might be relating to follow her on Instagram and she's written multiple books

399
00:35:13.920 --> 00:35:20.240
because she talks so well about this like distance running female fueling and the lack of education

400
00:35:20.240 --> 00:35:25.840
and the things we actually need to know about it yeah um because I think there's just it's just so

401
00:35:25.840 --> 00:35:31.280
easy to get it wrong yeah yeah and especially social media is a powerful platform but in that

402
00:35:31.280 --> 00:35:36.720
sense it's it's very good at taking something actually very complex with lots of layers which

403
00:35:36.720 --> 00:35:42.880
takes a lot of expert knowledge and years of experience and expertise and making it look incredibly

404
00:35:42.880 --> 00:35:48.960
simple to say anyone can do this just watch my day in the life video of how I train just copy that

405
00:35:48.960 --> 00:35:53.360
and you'll be fine exactly and it's not the case at all it's not the tool and even though my

406
00:35:54.160 --> 00:35:59.440
reds had a big psychological element it can also actually not have a psychological element like

407
00:36:00.480 --> 00:36:04.080
I mean there will be in the sense but it doesn't have to be a full bone eating disorder and that's

408
00:36:04.080 --> 00:36:08.160
what I also think people need to know is like okay it can be unintentional it can just be that like

409
00:36:08.160 --> 00:36:13.120
you just are under fuel and you don't realise and that can still cause you to be in this energy

410
00:36:13.120 --> 00:36:17.360
deficiency state which will be impacting your performance your health your menstrual cycle is part

411
00:36:17.360 --> 00:36:22.640
of your health um so even if you definitely don't identify as having a eating disorder don't

412
00:36:22.640 --> 00:36:27.280
think that you couldn't be affected by reds yeah and I don't know but I imagine with this trend

413
00:36:27.280 --> 00:36:32.720
on social media as well thinking about the if you are starting to if you go kind of from

414
00:36:33.280 --> 00:36:37.120
zero to a hundred or you start doing training very quickly for like math and running or

415
00:36:37.120 --> 00:36:41.760
or long distance running I imagine if you're training that hard you are going to see results

416
00:36:41.760 --> 00:36:45.600
I'm thinking about kind of the connection between body image that you've mentioned

417
00:36:45.600 --> 00:36:51.200
and disordered eating as well I mean how was body image for you over the it did that change a lot

418
00:36:51.760 --> 00:36:56.480
did you have more positive or negative times how did it look for you I mean there was definitely more

419
00:36:57.680 --> 00:37:04.560
after after Louise gave me that um diagnosis diagnosis but indication of potential reds yeah

420
00:37:04.560 --> 00:37:09.440
and she worked with me very closely on like a nutrition plan for my training that was definitely

421
00:37:09.440 --> 00:37:14.160
my period of probably best body image because actually I got really strong and I think I probably

422
00:37:14.160 --> 00:37:20.080
would have been on a road to recovery okay had I not then a couple of years later stopped sport

423
00:37:20.080 --> 00:37:26.560
okay and then because I deemed there to be no need for muscle and strength anymore

424
00:37:26.560 --> 00:37:32.240
which is silly but this is what happens when you still have an underlying

425
00:37:32.240 --> 00:37:37.200
disordered approach around food and body yeah and you're plunged into a state of a lot of

426
00:37:37.200 --> 00:37:42.720
personal and emotional stress um food becomes the control and the cracks and the support

427
00:37:42.720 --> 00:37:47.440
so I just sort of bend off everything that Louise had said and just started restricting what

428
00:37:47.440 --> 00:37:53.440
I was eating and I think but I think that best body image period was under Louise's guidance

429
00:37:53.440 --> 00:37:57.440
and that's where it can be super helpful to have an authority there helping you guiding you

430
00:37:57.440 --> 00:38:02.400
so I definitely got to more positive place and then it just plunged into a very bad place again

431
00:38:02.400 --> 00:38:11.360
yeah um for quite a few years until last January 2025 which is I went on a bit of an eat pray

432
00:38:11.440 --> 00:38:17.680
love soda trip to Australia before weeks wow amazing yeah and I think I just kind of sat with

433
00:38:17.680 --> 00:38:25.280
myself at that point I was so I would have been about turn 26 at the time yes at late 20th

434
00:38:25.280 --> 00:38:32.240
late in my 25th year into my 26 and I was kind of like this has gone on now for 11 years

435
00:38:32.960 --> 00:38:39.920
of no period it's you know food and body has controlled my life for that time to a greater and

436
00:38:39.920 --> 00:38:46.000
lesser extent but for over a decade and I was like this sucks like I don't want to do this anymore

437
00:38:46.000 --> 00:38:51.840
like I have so much life to live I want to have a family one day I can't bother this is too annoying

438
00:38:51.840 --> 00:38:58.400
and also I was I'd now been a journalist for at the stage I still part time by the way I wasn't

439
00:38:58.400 --> 00:39:02.640
full times a journalist but I was part times a journalist for nearly two years was so much more

440
00:39:02.640 --> 00:39:07.600
educated from speaking to experts through my job like the privilege that I'd had to work in women's

441
00:39:07.600 --> 00:39:13.840
health I now was armed with a lot of facts and I was like this is definitely food related this is

442
00:39:13.840 --> 00:39:20.480
definitely reds like initially reds and so I was like I'm going to do this myself I'm going to get

443
00:39:20.480 --> 00:39:26.480
better and it was at that point that when I came back I was like not going to the doctors not doing

444
00:39:26.480 --> 00:39:32.080
this with medical teams I'm doing this with like private help so I started working with a nutritionist

445
00:39:32.080 --> 00:39:36.080
in May so for the first few months I did it myself just from the education that I'd had from

446
00:39:36.080 --> 00:39:39.840
speaking to people through work and through articles that I'd written yeah I was like right

447
00:39:39.840 --> 00:39:45.840
I need more carbohydrates I need more protein I just need more food in general yeah and I need to

448
00:39:45.840 --> 00:39:50.800
be more mindful about my exercise so I need to not run five times a week I need to run once or

449
00:39:50.800 --> 00:39:55.440
twice and just do yoga and parties and more low impact strength training to look after my bones

450
00:39:56.400 --> 00:40:00.880
as well and then got to May and I was like I think I need a bit more help here because my

451
00:40:00.880 --> 00:40:06.480
periods don't come back yeah um started working with the nutritionist between May and September

452
00:40:07.360 --> 00:40:16.400
and then I also left my job in PR which was important because stress really impacts your menstrual

453
00:40:16.400 --> 00:40:22.320
cycles so not just physical stress but also emotional stress I was working super high pressure job

454
00:40:22.880 --> 00:40:28.800
so I think all of that was compounding together to kind of keep my hormones suppressed yeah

455
00:40:28.800 --> 00:40:36.640
so I left my job in July um was then full time for you to answer the journalist um and then in November

456
00:40:36.640 --> 00:40:43.440
I actually started therapy to work more on the kind of emotional stress I think I was holding quite a

457
00:40:43.440 --> 00:40:51.040
lot and then at the end of January so a year almost the day after I started trying to get my period

458
00:40:51.040 --> 00:41:01.680
back it came back after 12 years so it worked and but it took a full kind of whole body

459
00:41:01.680 --> 00:41:08.880
whole mind approach to essentially stress because reds is a stress condition like physical stress

460
00:41:08.880 --> 00:41:14.400
emotional stress psychological stress and that is what you have to address I think is look at every

461
00:41:14.400 --> 00:41:19.600
pillar of that so you know the emotional stress that was going through just from sort of unprocessed

462
00:41:19.600 --> 00:41:24.400
things that hadn't dealt with um the psychological and just daily stress of my job

463
00:41:24.400 --> 00:41:28.880
and then the physical stress of not eating enough so once I kind of addressed all of those things

464
00:41:28.880 --> 00:41:33.360
for a sustained period of time because that's the other thing people always say to me I've been trying

465
00:41:33.360 --> 00:41:37.440
to get my period back for a couple of months and I think the thing to remember is when your hormones

466
00:41:37.440 --> 00:41:43.440
have been switched off for years and years and years and years your body needs time to adjust and

467
00:41:43.440 --> 00:41:48.400
rebalance and kickstart those chemical processes in your maturity gland again you know

468
00:41:48.480 --> 00:41:54.400
like there's so much that has to happen and your body has to feel safe enough to know you're not

469
00:41:54.400 --> 00:41:59.360
going to start starving me again because at first it needs to just recoup the resources that it's

470
00:41:59.360 --> 00:42:04.960
been in fight or flight trying to hold on to yeah and then know that it's safe can stay in

471
00:42:04.960 --> 00:42:12.720
rest and digest to then start those processes again so it takes time yeah I mean no period for 12

472
00:42:12.720 --> 00:42:20.240
years how did it feel to have that period after 12 years it was so cool like I was actually like

473
00:42:20.240 --> 00:42:26.320
I was in a changing room in South Africa trying on clothes and like my boobs have been kind of

474
00:42:26.320 --> 00:42:32.800
hurting for a few days before I definitely like noticed changes in my body my hips were wide out

475
00:42:32.800 --> 00:42:37.920
and I was like I think this period is coming back I just had six cents and then it was so funny

476
00:42:37.920 --> 00:42:42.320
because I literally was in a changing room and then I saw some blood and I was like oh my god it

477
00:42:42.320 --> 00:42:47.760
was like so real I was like I honestly thought this day would never come and then I walked out of

478
00:42:47.760 --> 00:42:52.400
the changing room there was a baseball cap there that just said period and I was like that's so weird

479
00:42:52.400 --> 00:42:57.520
it was like a sign for God or something I don't know um but it just felt amazing I felt so

480
00:42:58.800 --> 00:43:05.040
feminine I think and I felt quite emotional and I think you know it was also a grief process because

481
00:43:05.040 --> 00:43:10.880
it was letting go of a decade long chapter of my life it felt like very symbolically letting go

482
00:43:10.880 --> 00:43:17.840
of my issues around food yeah but also just so hopeful because I'd also shut off from the idea

483
00:43:17.840 --> 00:43:22.640
of having children and then all of a sudden I was like huh maybe I can and that's also like

484
00:43:22.640 --> 00:43:30.720
my body works to the epic like that kind of outweighed all of the anxieties around body image or

485
00:43:30.720 --> 00:43:34.640
weight or whatever because I said my body is doing something like what it's supposed to do

486
00:43:34.640 --> 00:43:40.160
yeah and it felt yeah it felt amazing really yeah I can I can feel the emotion when you're talking

487
00:43:40.160 --> 00:43:45.760
about it like I can I can really get a sense and almost be like that that picture on my head of

488
00:43:45.760 --> 00:43:51.200
just how powerful that moment is for you because it seems to say oh 12 years no period but it's like

489
00:43:51.200 --> 00:43:58.480
actually hold on 12 years like over a decade that is such a a huge amount of time yeah and it happened

490
00:43:58.480 --> 00:44:03.200
to you over such a significant point in your life as well when we are all discovering who we want

491
00:44:03.200 --> 00:44:08.400
to be as a person yeah building connections to our body you know it did you feel like you had

492
00:44:08.400 --> 00:44:11.600
because you've talked about grief you've used the word grief quite a lot actually in this conversation

493
00:44:12.400 --> 00:44:17.840
did you feel like you had had a lot of your teenage years or young adolescents taking away

494
00:44:17.840 --> 00:44:23.360
did you feel like there's a lot of loss surrounding the conditions and I think I definitely feel

495
00:44:23.360 --> 00:44:32.000
a loss of my sport potential I think I wish I wish someone had stepped in and said like earlier

496
00:44:32.880 --> 00:44:37.440
your performance is probably suffering enormously because you don't have the energy like it can

497
00:44:37.440 --> 00:44:42.160
also affect the kind of elasticity of your tendons and everything which is so essential for like

498
00:44:43.440 --> 00:44:50.160
bouncing jumping based sport it can affect your reaction times your ability to kind of have

499
00:44:50.160 --> 00:44:55.040
fast twitch muscle fibers there were so many times in sessions where I was just so frustrated as to

500
00:44:55.040 --> 00:45:00.720
why I couldn't perform when I was training so hard and I wanted it so badly and it was like

501
00:45:00.720 --> 00:45:05.440
all my dream and everyone kept telling me I had all this amazing natural potential you know

502
00:45:05.440 --> 00:45:10.080
coaches would always be like you're just built perfectly like an athlete and you know you

503
00:45:10.080 --> 00:45:16.480
you've so much dedication and all of the stuff that should have made me a really good athlete

504
00:45:16.480 --> 00:45:21.760
and I feel like I wasn't and I could never understand why and I think honestly the hormonal

505
00:45:21.760 --> 00:45:27.600
imbalances were hugely a part of that so I think there was loss in that sense I also think

506
00:45:28.480 --> 00:45:35.200
there was just I just feel really sorry for like kind of the teenage I was because I was confused

507
00:45:35.200 --> 00:45:41.440
I don't know what I was doing and I think you just need a bit of help but then there's also

508
00:45:41.520 --> 00:45:48.480
so much I'm so proud of myself and like because I've beaten something that was like you know

509
00:45:49.120 --> 00:45:54.480
holding a lot over me so you know after that amount of time to have actually done it I was like

510
00:45:54.480 --> 00:46:00.240
can't believe this and then I'm also incredibly grateful to the people that did support me like

511
00:46:00.240 --> 00:46:04.480
the nutritionist I worked with Hannah Carter right she was so supportive and amazing the

512
00:46:04.480 --> 00:46:09.760
therapist that I've worked with Rene McGregor who just provided a really great expert commentary

513
00:46:09.760 --> 00:46:17.200
for my pieces like people like Dr Helen O'Neill who founded her tility like she spoke to me so

514
00:46:17.200 --> 00:46:22.960
many like women that have defined my recovery from it yeah even if they didn't come from like

515
00:46:22.960 --> 00:46:30.320
the traditional medical yes you know NHS situations yeah now I mean and what's really powerful as

516
00:46:30.320 --> 00:46:35.680
as it's when you talk about holistic recovery it is about 360 recovery and you're right there's

517
00:46:35.680 --> 00:46:39.760
so many different experts and people from different walks of life with different things that can

518
00:46:39.760 --> 00:46:43.360
help you that need to be part of that journey like psychotherapy and nutrition and different things

519
00:46:44.000 --> 00:46:48.160
but I remember you saying earlier that there are a lot of people in your life when you were still

520
00:46:48.160 --> 00:46:53.120
kind of competing or coming towards the end of that in your early 20s that clearly really wanted

521
00:46:53.120 --> 00:46:57.280
to help and you could maybe see that you were struggling and going through something even if it

522
00:46:57.280 --> 00:47:01.520
wasn't the doctors that really wanted to help and it wasn't the right time and you said you

523
00:47:01.520 --> 00:47:05.360
fact you couldn't access that and kind of reach out to that and what really comes through is that

524
00:47:05.360 --> 00:47:09.760
when it was the right time for you you went out and did all of that like you went out there and

525
00:47:09.760 --> 00:47:14.800
you did that like no one actually forced you to in the end no one really pushed you and said no

526
00:47:14.800 --> 00:47:19.200
you haven't got a choice you need to deal with this that was all you it came from your own back

527
00:47:19.200 --> 00:47:24.640
yeah exactly and I think that's where you do need intrinsic motivation to get through this like

528
00:47:25.440 --> 00:47:29.920
it does it has to come from you to start with because if someone else is telling you you're not on

529
00:47:29.920 --> 00:47:36.400
board it's never going to happen but I do also think where that's where I feel incredibly privileged

530
00:47:36.400 --> 00:47:41.120
to do the job I do because it gave me the knowledge because the knowledge was what the motivation

531
00:47:41.120 --> 00:47:46.720
came because before I knew what I was doing to my body you know before I understood how important

532
00:47:46.720 --> 00:47:52.960
the menstrual cycle was for so much more than having children or like when I understood that it

533
00:47:52.960 --> 00:47:58.080
was such a vital sign of health and that I was maybe impacting like the length of my life you know

534
00:47:58.560 --> 00:48:04.400
if I if I have terrible bones and then I keep getting fractures my chance of death over 50 is so

535
00:48:04.400 --> 00:48:09.200
much higher you know all of those factors that started clicking in my brain of going this is not

536
00:48:09.200 --> 00:48:14.880
just a having children thing this is a you might not be able to hike up the mountain when you're

537
00:48:14.880 --> 00:48:22.320
70 like you might be immobile and frail and in a wheelchair and completely like and all of those

538
00:48:22.320 --> 00:48:27.920
things that I could prevent and that has almost how selfish of me not to when there's other people

539
00:48:27.920 --> 00:48:33.680
that are kind of putting those out of you know not their own free will yeah and yeah I have a

540
00:48:33.680 --> 00:48:38.960
choice here to be healthy and I'm choosing not to be yeah so I think it was that that kind of

541
00:48:38.960 --> 00:48:43.520
clicked in me but you wouldn't know that until you have the knowledge yes that's why we need the

542
00:48:43.520 --> 00:48:48.800
knowledge yeah knowledge is power yeah which is why we need these podcasts yeah we need these

543
00:48:48.800 --> 00:48:56.640
conversations already to talk about this for those young women and older than you younger than you

544
00:48:56.640 --> 00:49:02.480
generations coming that maybe have been listening to this or just out there on social in the world

545
00:49:02.480 --> 00:49:10.480
thinking I think red sounds right or I think that I am under eating go I'm overtraining or this

546
00:49:10.480 --> 00:49:16.560
conversation is just resonated do you have any advice is there a message you would give to them about

547
00:49:17.440 --> 00:49:21.840
well looking back I absolutely hate the advice of just going to your GP which is what always

548
00:49:21.840 --> 00:49:27.360
seems to be the advice because I've had such bad experiences with it so it's a really tough

549
00:49:27.360 --> 00:49:34.080
piece of advice to give because what worked for me was that by the time I was you know 26 working

550
00:49:34.080 --> 00:49:42.320
full time I had the means to go to a nutritionist so if you have the financial resources to go to a

551
00:49:42.320 --> 00:49:49.040
therapist and a nutritionist that would be my gold standard yes advice yeah but I recognize

552
00:49:49.040 --> 00:49:55.280
that that is not a position that like everyone is in by any means yeah so if you're not I think it

553
00:49:55.280 --> 00:50:00.240
would be to write down all of your symptoms how long you've not had a period for all the reasons

554
00:50:00.240 --> 00:50:05.200
why you don't believe it's another reproductive health condition and go to your doctor armed with

555
00:50:05.200 --> 00:50:11.520
as much advice and confidence and clarity as you can because often when you can present them with

556
00:50:11.520 --> 00:50:17.680
clearer facts you can get more of what you want so it's going and asking the right questions so

557
00:50:17.680 --> 00:50:23.520
can I please have a dexascan can I have blood tests done I suspect this is what I have and go into

558
00:50:23.520 --> 00:50:30.000
them not asking but almost telling I think that's a really important way to go and if you can take

559
00:50:30.000 --> 00:50:36.400
someone with you who you trust even better because you might need to be strong in that situation

560
00:50:36.400 --> 00:50:40.560
and keep pushing doors that are closing in your face yeah I think it is improving and there is

561
00:50:40.560 --> 00:50:44.880
more awareness out there so hopefully people aren't going to have the same negative experiences

562
00:50:44.880 --> 00:50:50.160
yeah but just to be aware and not to give up if you do have an initially not right experience your

563
00:50:50.160 --> 00:50:55.680
body knows best there are also resources out there like fertility which can do a lot of the

564
00:50:55.680 --> 00:51:00.880
diagnostic process I think it costs around £200 for a test but you can get a lot of diagnosis

565
00:51:00.880 --> 00:51:05.920
from them that can then signpost you onto specialists within more of like an NHS setting I believe

566
00:51:05.920 --> 00:51:11.360
so yeah I think it can be obviously an investment but maybe cheaper than having to full go private

567
00:51:11.360 --> 00:51:16.560
with a nutritionist so there's options there too and then lastly I would say to follow as many

568
00:51:17.200 --> 00:51:25.120
really credible experts like Dr like Reenie McGregor like Dr Helen O'Neill those accounts

569
00:51:25.120 --> 00:51:29.520
rather than just like a random wellness creator like look for the credentials look for someone being

570
00:51:29.520 --> 00:51:34.320
a gynecologist and seek those out online because there is a lot of good information out there

571
00:51:35.920 --> 00:51:42.960
and then lastly read good magazines like Stylist for example who I wrote my period recovery story

572
00:51:42.960 --> 00:51:50.880
for they produced some really great expert credible women's health content which is obviously

573
00:51:50.880 --> 00:51:55.040
it's only going to give you knowledge but you can do this on your own so once you have the knowledge

574
00:51:55.040 --> 00:52:01.200
it's good yeah so that would sort of be my plethora or advice that's that's incredible

575
00:52:01.280 --> 00:52:06.240
that got to one piece but that's a whole kind of action plan with different kinds of steps for

576
00:52:06.240 --> 00:52:10.800
people at different stages with different level of resources and what I love that I think it's

577
00:52:10.800 --> 00:52:15.920
really coming through for my conversation is you mentioned it before about meant periods and

578
00:52:15.920 --> 00:52:22.400
menstrual site and the menstrual cycle being a sign a vital sign of health and I think the more we

579
00:52:22.400 --> 00:52:28.080
can move educating ourselves and the future generations and the wider healthcare system to think

580
00:52:28.080 --> 00:52:32.560
that way yeah it will be so much better weren't it because whether it's endometriosis or red

581
00:52:32.560 --> 00:52:40.000
so the conditions or pregnancy or fertility whatever it might be if we look at the period

582
00:52:40.000 --> 00:52:44.320
in the menstrual cycle as this is a really good indicator of even as you're saying like

583
00:52:44.320 --> 00:52:49.200
osteoporosis when you're thinking about older age or how long you might live for or the quality

584
00:52:49.200 --> 00:52:54.320
of life you might have when you're older we're so short-sighted I think we need to elongate that

585
00:52:54.800 --> 00:53:00.640
your period is the most amazing wonderful thing about you like it's I think it's incredible I'm so

586
00:53:00.640 --> 00:53:05.920
grateful to have mine like having lost it I'm like I freaking love this thing every time it comes

587
00:53:05.920 --> 00:53:11.280
every month it's maybe not the most convenient but it's telling me that my body's working also

588
00:53:11.280 --> 00:53:16.480
this is only the beginning of the journey it's not the end because ovulation is really what matters

589
00:53:16.480 --> 00:53:20.640
to show that like your hormones are in balance and you can have a period without ovulating as I'm

590
00:53:20.720 --> 00:53:28.480
sure you know yeah and so for me now I'm cycle tracking using my basal body temperature every day

591
00:53:28.480 --> 00:53:34.800
and looking at my cervical fluid and educating myself because I didn't even know that like why

592
00:53:34.800 --> 00:53:38.560
your cervical fluid changes throughout the month I didn't know that like I was like oh we know

593
00:53:38.560 --> 00:53:42.800
when it's more slippery and kind of milky it means one thing and then when it's more like

594
00:53:42.800 --> 00:53:47.680
yellowy it means another thing and it tells you where you are in your cycle and so by tracking

595
00:53:47.760 --> 00:53:52.480
these things I can actually learn whether I am ovulating every month because that's the final

596
00:53:52.480 --> 00:53:56.800
stage of recovery from reds you know you need a period back but then you need your ovulation back

597
00:53:56.800 --> 00:54:01.200
yeah and that's going to show you that you're in balance so I think it's it's looking at this as

598
00:54:01.200 --> 00:54:05.760
something really that you can get curious about you can learn so much about yourself you can

599
00:54:05.760 --> 00:54:10.800
become so connected to yourself and it's just going to stand you in such good stead for kind

600
00:54:10.800 --> 00:54:15.200
of all the stages of life that you go through whether that's trying for a baby menopause whatever

601
00:54:15.200 --> 00:54:20.640
and beyond yeah it sounds like a real journey of discovery and I love when you talk you can

602
00:54:20.640 --> 00:54:26.800
you can see how excited and positive and kind of it sounds like you've just got really curious

603
00:54:26.800 --> 00:54:29.760
and it's fun to get curious because you're learning more about yourself and you're learning more

604
00:54:29.760 --> 00:54:34.640
about how you operate and how you can support your body and that's such a beautiful place to be

605
00:54:34.640 --> 00:54:41.840
in compared to 12 years ago which was confusion, disconnection and huge shame like I was just

606
00:54:41.840 --> 00:54:47.440
a critical and like ashamed of my body and like you know this is bad this isn't right blah blah blah

607
00:54:47.440 --> 00:54:52.080
and then now I'm like this is amazing oh my god it does this like wow and like when you start to

608
00:54:52.080 --> 00:54:57.440
look at your body with this really like excited curious lens like you say rather than a shameful

609
00:54:58.160 --> 00:55:02.160
negative lenses yeah that's good and we haven't talked about but I want to quickly

610
00:55:02.160 --> 00:55:07.600
touch on it because you do know what is a journalist and you are completely in the world of

611
00:55:07.600 --> 00:55:11.520
women's health and you've written some fantastic pieces you're just telling me before about peace

612
00:55:11.520 --> 00:55:17.120
about intimate justice and medical trauma and things like that and you write about all different

613
00:55:17.120 --> 00:55:25.280
kinds of things how has that how has that kind of built your relationship with women's health

614
00:55:25.280 --> 00:55:29.040
from your own body point of view and just the general concept of women's health being a journalist

615
00:55:29.040 --> 00:55:33.840
being able to go and find those stories what's like experience been like yeah I think for a start

616
00:55:33.840 --> 00:55:37.840
kind of back to shame I think it's it's really enlightened me of like all the things we don't

617
00:55:37.840 --> 00:55:43.120
need to be ashamed about that are so normal that so many women deal with yeah and we don't talk about

618
00:55:44.080 --> 00:55:50.000
so I think what it's done for me is first of all made me so aware of the huge lack in research and

619
00:55:50.720 --> 00:55:56.240
how far we have to go and how much lacking of knowledge a lot of women are and there's a kind of

620
00:55:56.240 --> 00:56:00.800
a problem of body literacy and we need to change that and it feels like my small way that I can

621
00:56:00.800 --> 00:56:06.640
contribute and then also yeah it's kind of eradicated that shame because I honestly think every

622
00:56:06.640 --> 00:56:11.760
experience at this point is normal like you know there's nothing off the limit off cut off the cards

623
00:56:11.760 --> 00:56:16.160
I want to write about people's deepest darkest most embarrassing moments that they late night

624
00:56:16.160 --> 00:56:21.920
googled because that's the parts that we need the answers to so yeah I think yeah it's been pivotal

625
00:56:21.920 --> 00:56:28.800
for me and in my my own journey and it also shows me how important it is because every time I write

626
00:56:28.800 --> 00:56:33.600
a piece like that the amount of DMs that I get from from women that are like oh my gosh thank you

627
00:56:33.600 --> 00:56:37.920
for writing about this I needed to see this I didn't feel seen I didn't feel hurt I thought it was

628
00:56:37.920 --> 00:56:43.440
just me and it's like it's never just you know you know and I think that's so important yeah and

629
00:56:43.440 --> 00:56:48.240
you're playing a really important part and it's exactly what we talk about a lot in terms of like

630
00:56:48.240 --> 00:56:54.800
why I started the podcast and what we're doing of it's women's being seen heard and believed and

631
00:56:54.800 --> 00:57:02.800
those are so such three key things that aren't happening across town cities across the country

632
00:57:02.800 --> 00:57:09.280
in the world and it's so pivotal to your identity and whether you feel like you can function you

633
00:57:09.280 --> 00:57:13.600
have a good quality of life or not you get answers or not it's just the core of everything isn't it

634
00:57:13.600 --> 00:57:17.040
totally and I think like I mean this is why I was so drawn to this podcast because I think that is

635
00:57:17.040 --> 00:57:22.960
the that's the whole thing right you need you need to have your experience reflected back at you

636
00:57:22.960 --> 00:57:28.480
when someone listens to something and they're like oh my gosh that's me like that's so it's so

637
00:57:28.480 --> 00:57:32.880
critical I think it can be the honesty the thing that makes someone go and get help or you know

638
00:57:32.880 --> 00:57:36.560
do something about it because they suddenly realise that it is a it's a real thing yeah

639
00:57:36.560 --> 00:57:40.720
touch in the head yes they're not going crazy no I'm not going crazy either like truly hand on

640
00:57:40.720 --> 00:57:45.440
heart believe don't believe that there is a single person that has ever late night googled a question

641
00:57:45.440 --> 00:57:50.480
that somebody else hasn't already googled totally no we're not reinventing the world like there are

642
00:57:50.480 --> 00:57:55.760
millions of weird wonderful and out there questions but you won't have been the only person in the

643
00:57:55.760 --> 00:58:01.760
world to have asked that question even if you feel like you are 100% actually been amazing thank you

644
00:58:01.760 --> 00:58:08.560
thank you thank you I do have one podcast edition for you one last question which I think the way

645
00:58:08.560 --> 00:58:11.360
you talked about your son is so eloquent and you just explained it beautifully I think it

646
00:58:11.360 --> 00:58:16.640
will be very good at answering this question so I want you to imagine that I'm not sat here

647
00:58:16.720 --> 00:58:22.240
I'm not in this chair but the person that is sat in this chair is a young gash oh my god okay

648
00:58:22.240 --> 00:58:28.320
so she could be 16 kind of young teenagers a few years older 20s you can pick

649
00:58:29.120 --> 00:58:34.960
but if she was here if you could see her and speak to her and say anything what would it be

650
00:58:35.920 --> 00:58:46.240
I think it would be you are worthy of help you're enough as you are and it's never too late to get

651
00:58:46.240 --> 00:58:54.160
better would be yeah amazing yeah very succinct yeah very on point I love that beautiful

652
00:58:55.120 --> 00:59:03.520
thank you so much I loved our gashat today thank you so much for joining me if you want more content

653
00:59:03.520 --> 00:59:08.320
about periods and women's health conditions then make sure you subscribe wherever you're listening

654
00:59:08.320 --> 00:59:13.760
and watching you can follow us on socials using at it's not just a period.uk head to the show

655
00:59:13.760 --> 00:59:18.800
notes for all the links and info about today's guest I can't wait to see you next time I remember

656
00:59:18.800 --> 00:59:26.160
girls it's not just a period.