WEBVTT

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People think the hardest part about sex is the act.

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I disagree.

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The hardest part is about having the conversation before, during, and after.

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Tonight we're talking about conversations that can strengthen relationships, protect your health, and build trust.

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Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh

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Triple hearts.

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Let's talk about this poly love, poly love.

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Triple hearts.

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I'm Coco.

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Welcome to Triple Hearts.

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Hello, and I'm your girl Lala.

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Happy to be here.

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As you know, this is a big episode.

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Today we are talking about...

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Sex, the sex talk, which is a big one.

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As you know, the more partners you involve, the talk about your health is just, it's not optional.

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It's just not up for debate whether you can have the conversation or not.

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And I know PrEP is a big thing right now.

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A lot of people are talking about it.

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A lot of people are trying it out.

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It's not something that I've tried.

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However, I do have a story.

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Okay.

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Story time.

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All right.

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Story time.

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We love a good story time.

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So I'm on TikTok.

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Y'all know I love me some TikTok.

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And I'm scrolling.

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And I come across this story where this young lady, she was dating this guy, I think, for like five or six years.

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Okay.

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And he was cheating on her.

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He finds out that he is HIV positive.

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And he comes to her and he lets her know.

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And she says, well, I don't have it.

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And he was like, well, how do you know?

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You need to be tested.

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You know, we have to be safe.

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All of a sudden, he wants to be safe.

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Right?

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And she said, well, I've been on PrEP for the last two years.

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So I know I don't have it.

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He had the nerve to feel deceived by her.

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And went on Facebook and made a whole post about, like, how he felt betrayed by,

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He felt betrayed.

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He felt betrayed because she was taking crap behind his back.

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I'm protecting myself.

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As you should.

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As you should.

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You feel a way because I am protecting myself.

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From something that you actually did do.

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Like, if you were, like, you know, super committed and super faithful and whatever it is, and you felt like, damn, she didn't trust me—

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You actually weren't trustworthy and could have taken her.

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Well, I'm not going to say taken her life.

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HIV is not a death sentence anymore.

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There are a lot of things that have changed over the years.

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However, you could have changed her life forever.

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Absolutely.

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The nerve, girl.

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The nerve it takes me.

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You know the little girl that be on all of me?

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She be like, the old modacity.

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That's exactly what I'm sitting here like.

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Yeah.

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I haven't seen that, but that's hilarious.

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Audacity.

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Girl, Audacity is on sale.

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I'm telling you.

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Yeah, girl.

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That story, it kind of like sat with me because I'm like, at what point are you able to trust someone?

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Like, you know what I mean?

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Like, damn.

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Yeah, I trust you as far as I can see you.

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And I trust you to the capacity of...

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I don't know why people think that it's a hard conversation.

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Like, it's not a hard conversation to have.

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I feel like...

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It's like self-explanatory.

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Like, it's almost like, especially at this big grown age.

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It's hard if you make it hard.

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Yes.

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Like, don't be weird.

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I just feel like, okay, so I don't understand why people are so uncomfortable having the talk about sexual health.

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When, for me, and I mean, we don't have to have it.

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Like, when we're right in the mood and we're getting excited and it's getting hot and skinny in the air.

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Right.

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But prior to, why can't we have that conversation?

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Yeah.

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At this big grown age, if you can't have a big grown conversation, but you want to do the grown up.

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Hello.

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You need to read by a week something.

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Yeah, because that's making me itch.

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Yeah.

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Like for real.

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Like when, I mean, I think at this age, even with dating.

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You're going to be in a space where you're like, okay, when's the last time you've been tested?

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Yeah.

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Right?

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Like, do you go to the doctor on the regular?

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Like, all these things.

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These are just certain questions that you take care of yourself.

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Yes.

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And, you know.

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And I want to know that.

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And most men, unfortunately, no shade, a lot of men.

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Let me not say most.

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But a lot of men, unless you have, like, a woman that really cares about you, right?

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Whether it be a sister, a mom, a cousin, a girlfriend, a wife, a partner, what have you.

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I typically see that a lot of men, they don't take care of themselves.

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And they also feel like, well, if I'm dealing with you and you don't have anything, I don't have anything.

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Right.

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Right.

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But you can't think that way if you're fucking other people.

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That right there.

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So if her, her, her, and her are good, you assume that you're good?

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Right.

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Or what about your other stuff?

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Like, what about your cholesterol and stuff?

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What if you fall out and die on top of me?

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Like, what's going on?

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Like, you ain't... You ain't gonna get your prostate checked?

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Yes.

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Girl, no.

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And your colon.

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Because you know they don't want to get their prostate checked.

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Did you see the story where the young man got his prostate checked, y'all?

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And he shot the doctor?

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Yep.

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Get the fuck out of here.

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I swear to you, this is a real story.

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He came and he was uncomfortable.

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But guys, you do have a G-spot in your ass.

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In your rectum.

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Yes, you do.

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Yeah.

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For sure.

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For sure.

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So, I mean, it's possible that it happens.

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But, I mean, you were there, you were getting checked, and you shat this man.

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That is nuts.

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Do you think he intentionally made you nut as a doctor?

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That part right there.

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You think he gives a fuck about your nut?

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That part, right?

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He's trying to make sure you don't have polyps.

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Right.

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That's all.

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Um, yeah.

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It's just, yeah.

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I don't know.

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That is crazy as shit.

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I love these conversations.

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I love that we can have these conversations and lay them on the open.

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Yes.

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Because I think they're super important to have.

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Absolutely.

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Especially as it relates to sex, since everybody wants to sexualize everything.

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Right.

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If you want to sexualize, let's get to the nitty gritty then.

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If you really want to talk about it.

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If you want to talk about it.

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I just think, do you think that it's, um...

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Do you think that it is responsible?

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Is that the word I'm looking for?

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Well, I think, yeah, responsible enough to go to someone and ask.

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Like, if you're dealing with someone or whatever, would you be asking them, when do you think it's appropriate to ask when's the last time you've been tested?

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Yeah.

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Well, maybe not the first date, but if you get to like three or four, I think that's an appropriate conversation.

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Yeah.

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Because after three or four, that means I'm interested in you.

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I'm interested in you.

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And at this point, I don't want to wait until, like you said, I don't want to wait until we're in the moment.

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And it's steamy.

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And it's steamy anywhere in the moment.

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And then I blow your, and your dick goes into your navel because now I'm like, when's the last time you got tested?

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Yeah.

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Even if we use this condom, because this can break.

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Yeah.

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You know what I mean?

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So, like, when's the last time?

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Yeah.

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I think that's fair because...

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I do, too.

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It could get steamy from here.

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Yeah.

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You know what I mean?

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Right.

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So, yeah.

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I think that's a fair...

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Yeah.

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Range.

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I'm quick to be like, one second, we can go in this here, this portal.

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Let's pull it up.

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Or we can go together.

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Yeah.

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Whatever your preference is.

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I just, I don't know.

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I think I try to figure out, like, why we normalize having conversations about, like, what's your triggers and what's your favorite color?

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Or how about what's your favorite position?

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You can ask that.

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How are you going to ask me that?

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My favorite position is sitting, getting my blood work and getting a swab.

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That's my favorite position.

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Okay.

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So once we start there, then we can talk about my favorite position.

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Exactly.

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There we go.

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And I'm a control freak, so we already know my favorite position.

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Makes sense.

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Makes sense.

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Yes, yes, yes.

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Yeah.

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What is one conversation about sex that you wish someone would have had with you when you were younger, if any?

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Okay.

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Because I'm sitting here trying to think, like, is there anything that I would have wanted to do?

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I mean, I knew about, I've always known about, you know, getting tested and, you know, the right person and being safe and using protection.

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I feel like the conversations that I wish I would have had or just heard or explored more, I would have to say being more in tune with what I want and being more free and more explorative.

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Okay.

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Yeah, I know that probably sounds weird, but... No, it doesn't.

221
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It doesn't sound weird at all.

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Just only your body.

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And I think...

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Yes.

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Yeah.

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Because I think it took a while for me to kind of, like, learn my body.

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Now, at this big grown-ass age, I know it, right?

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But in my younger day, it was just, like, it was very exciting.

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It was raining dicks and vajays.

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It was a lot going on.

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So I was like, you know, like, this is okay.

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But it wasn't a... Now you have to mentally fuck me.

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And... Yeah.

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I just think for younger, I wish that I would have known, A, how precious my body was.

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Oh, that's the one.

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Yeah.

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Can somebody talk to me about that?

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Absolutely.

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Can we have a conversation about that?

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Absolutely.

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Like, just let me know, like, if I'm not ready for it, I don't have to do this.

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I don't have to do this.

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And I think not being naive enough to put yourself in situations where you're...

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It's never too late to say no.

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I won't ever put that out there.

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But I found myself in situations where I didn't want to do something and had to, but couldn't back out of it.

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So definitely protecting yourself, knowing what you're who's worthy of yourself and not putting yourself in predicaments or situations like reading the room and knowing what men's real intention or people's real intentions are with putting you in certain places or inviting you to certain places or, you know, just not being green.

248
00:10:18.347 --> 00:10:18.767
Yeah.

249
00:10:19.107 --> 00:10:19.367
Yeah.

250
00:10:19.907 --> 00:10:20.487
Definitely.

251
00:10:21.308 --> 00:10:22.168
Oh, yeah.

252
00:10:22.188 --> 00:10:23.588
I've had to push some people off or.

253
00:10:24.162 --> 00:10:26.523
maybe wasn't able to necessarily push them off.

254
00:10:26.583 --> 00:10:27.103
You know what I mean?

255
00:10:27.203 --> 00:10:29.104
I've been in situations like that.

256
00:10:29.745 --> 00:10:30.265
Oh, yeah.

257
00:10:30.705 --> 00:10:31.666
No, that's not cool.

258
00:10:31.866 --> 00:10:32.206
At all.

259
00:10:33.086 --> 00:10:33.526
At all.

260
00:10:34.107 --> 00:10:39.049
Like, you trying to get, you trying to meet some hot grits is what you're trying to do.

261
00:10:39.189 --> 00:10:39.569
Okay?

262
00:10:39.609 --> 00:10:40.970
We about to play grit ball.

263
00:10:40.990 --> 00:10:41.530
Grit ball.

264
00:10:42.511 --> 00:10:42.931
Okay?

265
00:10:42.991 --> 00:10:44.132
Madea taught us that.

266
00:10:44.232 --> 00:10:44.392
Okay?

267
00:10:44.432 --> 00:10:45.432
And so did my grandmother.

268
00:10:45.452 --> 00:10:46.833
And then I have iron skillets.

269
00:10:47.598 --> 00:10:48.258
And that's what I cook in.

270
00:10:48.278 --> 00:10:48.818
It was super hot.

271
00:10:48.998 --> 00:10:49.258
Ooh.

272
00:10:49.278 --> 00:10:50.199
It was super hot.

273
00:10:50.239 --> 00:10:50.779
That's sticking.

274
00:10:51.059 --> 00:10:52.119
And it hurt, okay?

275
00:10:52.139 --> 00:10:53.399
Because they're super heavy.

276
00:10:53.579 --> 00:10:55.040
So it's going to hurt me picking it up.

277
00:10:55.300 --> 00:10:57.900
And, yep, going across your head is just not a good look.

278
00:10:57.920 --> 00:10:58.760
It's not good.

279
00:10:58.940 --> 00:11:01.001
I just don't feel like you should be forced upon doing anything.

280
00:11:01.021 --> 00:11:01.861
And that's anyway.

281
00:11:01.901 --> 00:11:13.544
Like, even in, like, you know how you have relationships and such, they feel like because you're married or because you're in a relationship, it's supposed to be like, and I've been in a situation where I've just kind of like, I'm about to give you this, here you go, pussy.

282
00:11:14.064 --> 00:11:15.444
Just leave me alone.

283
00:11:15.944 --> 00:11:16.765
Like, I don't feel like it.

284
00:11:16.785 --> 00:11:20.611
I have a friend who says, her nigga says, I want a willing participant.

285
00:11:20.631 --> 00:11:26.761
Or I want a... Well, he said, not a willing... A willing participant is about to take me home.

286
00:11:26.781 --> 00:11:28.103
Not willing, but...

287
00:11:29.576 --> 00:11:55.312
excited participant um he used a different word but another word for excited basically uh participant and I was like I mean I kind of understand that because if he met a bitch off the street right now she and or not a better bitch off the street but if he was dealing with someone new she would be excited and you know so I guess that kind of makes sense you wouldn't want nobody to get you know something to be excited about got that

288
00:11:56.252 --> 00:11:56.612
Okay?

289
00:11:56.672 --> 00:12:00.574
Because if my shit over here shriveled up, it's because you made it that way.

290
00:12:01.575 --> 00:12:02.295
You didn't do the work.

291
00:12:02.435 --> 00:12:02.755
Yeah.

292
00:12:03.015 --> 00:12:03.295
Yeah.

293
00:12:03.496 --> 00:12:05.937
And, like, I'm a person where, like, work me up to it.

294
00:12:06.177 --> 00:12:06.537
Yeah.

295
00:12:06.557 --> 00:12:08.478
Are you, like, a foreplay person or are you just, like, get to it?

296
00:12:08.538 --> 00:12:09.218
Get straight to it?

297
00:12:09.739 --> 00:12:11.099
I mean, who doesn't like foreplay?

298
00:12:11.239 --> 00:12:11.780
Yeah.

299
00:12:11.860 --> 00:12:13.480
Like, oh, girl, I done seen some people.

300
00:12:13.500 --> 00:12:15.821
Because I'm like, who are the bitches you been hunting?

301
00:12:17.122 --> 00:12:23.388
Because this one right here, like, can you just, like, play with me, rub a feather on me or something, or just rub me down prior to you just trying to shove it in?

302
00:12:23.768 --> 00:12:26.050
Or how about when I'm, like, because I like being touched.

303
00:12:26.070 --> 00:12:30.014
We know that, you know, one of my love languages is physical touch.

304
00:12:30.674 --> 00:12:34.037
And I love, like, massages or just touching and caressing and such.

305
00:12:34.117 --> 00:12:36.419
Child, that thing will just...

306
00:12:37.240 --> 00:12:59.209
touch and then here I feel a finger and I'm like now my item popped open because I'm like well damn I you've been rubbing for two seconds like why is everything why you got up now you're gonna turn me off and everything is just because you just too ready you rushing through you need to heat the engine up you rushing through it I don't like to be rushed look at your face ew that is stanky

307
00:13:01.855 --> 00:13:04.077
Oh, it was an eager participant.

308
00:13:04.677 --> 00:13:05.558
Oh, eager.

309
00:13:05.618 --> 00:13:06.119
I love that.

310
00:13:06.159 --> 00:13:08.220
And maybe your folks are just a little too eager.

311
00:13:08.921 --> 00:13:10.362
Very too eager.

312
00:13:10.382 --> 00:13:10.762
Yeah.

313
00:13:10.843 --> 00:13:11.583
Oh, he was eager.

314
00:13:11.643 --> 00:13:11.983
Okay.

315
00:13:12.784 --> 00:13:15.666
Won't mention no names, but I'm sure they know exactly who I'm talking about.

316
00:13:15.927 --> 00:13:16.747
Well, he knows now.

317
00:13:16.767 --> 00:13:17.728
Yep, he does.

318
00:13:17.808 --> 00:13:18.469
And I don't mind.

319
00:13:18.489 --> 00:13:19.590
Don't rush.

320
00:13:19.710 --> 00:13:20.190
Whatever.

321
00:13:20.290 --> 00:13:21.531
Don't rush, baby.

322
00:13:21.711 --> 00:13:22.772
Yeah, take your time.

323
00:13:22.832 --> 00:13:23.553
It is okay.

324
00:13:23.673 --> 00:13:24.173
It's okay.

325
00:13:24.214 --> 00:13:24.734
It's okay.

326
00:13:27.576 --> 00:13:32.097
Do you feel like sexual compatibility is something that has to be there from the beginning?

327
00:13:37.519 --> 00:13:46.643
Unfortunately, I'm not the type of person that can stick around to find out whether we could make ourselves compatible.

328
00:13:46.723 --> 00:13:50.004
If it's awkward, it's hard to revisit for me.

329
00:13:51.424 --> 00:13:52.505
I probably just won't.

330
00:13:53.533 --> 00:13:54.554
I probably just won't do it again.

331
00:13:54.834 --> 00:13:55.635
I just probably won't.

332
00:13:55.815 --> 00:13:58.697
It wasn't that he was just... What if he was, like, too excited?

333
00:13:58.817 --> 00:14:01.400
Or she was just too excited?

334
00:14:01.420 --> 00:14:06.984
So, coming fast is not the same as not having compatibility.

335
00:14:07.004 --> 00:14:07.725
Mm-hmm.

336
00:14:07.765 --> 00:14:11.228
Because we could have still had, like, this heated intimacy...

337
00:14:11.548 --> 00:14:14.372
or this heated intimate moment that was just like everything.

338
00:14:14.792 --> 00:14:15.874
And you just happen to come a little fast.

339
00:14:15.934 --> 00:14:17.075
Okay, we can run it back.

340
00:14:17.355 --> 00:14:19.438
I'll give you, what, two minutes or, you know, whatever you need.

341
00:14:19.838 --> 00:14:20.960
Oh, speaking of that.

342
00:14:20.980 --> 00:14:21.681
We can run it back.

343
00:14:21.741 --> 00:14:22.742
You know, that's cool.

344
00:14:22.762 --> 00:14:24.744
Like, it doesn't mean that we're not compatible.

345
00:14:25.305 --> 00:14:28.649
But if we literally, like, aren't compatible, it's awkward.

346
00:14:28.669 --> 00:14:29.731
And I don't want to do that again.

347
00:14:29.751 --> 00:14:30.692
Mm-hmm.

348
00:14:31.052 --> 00:14:33.693
So, yeah, it has to be like that from the beginning.

349
00:14:33.753 --> 00:14:36.694
Like, do you make mention like, tonight was kind of, you know.

350
00:14:37.414 --> 00:14:38.814
I won't talk about it, unfortunately.

351
00:14:38.834 --> 00:14:41.535
And that's like the complete opposite of what our show is about.

352
00:14:41.615 --> 00:14:43.556
And like, you know, I'm normally very vocal.

353
00:14:43.576 --> 00:14:44.456
Meanwhile, y'all, I'm so vocal.

354
00:14:44.496 --> 00:14:48.037
And I'm very communicative, but I don't ever want to hurt anybody's feelings and say, yeah, that didn't do it for me.

355
00:14:51.198 --> 00:14:56.640
Unfortunately, I disagree because at this big age, I'm going to let you know, like, I don't know what was going on last night.

356
00:14:56.940 --> 00:14:57.040
Oh.

357
00:14:58.713 --> 00:15:01.134
I could not imagine hearing that conversation.

358
00:15:01.174 --> 00:15:01.715
That's hilarious.

359
00:15:01.795 --> 00:15:04.276
And I wouldn't do it in a very disrespectful way.

360
00:15:04.316 --> 00:15:06.958
I would literally sit there or whatever, like, not trying to kill your pride.

361
00:15:07.398 --> 00:15:09.039
But, like, we got to have a conversation about this.

362
00:15:09.079 --> 00:15:10.180
Boo, is everything okay?

363
00:15:10.580 --> 00:15:12.841
Which, I mean, the way – it's a hard conversation.

364
00:15:12.881 --> 00:15:16.624
But I think the way that you're going about it might actually –

365
00:15:17.364 --> 00:15:17.885
Fix things.

366
00:15:17.945 --> 00:15:19.206
It might be better the next time.

367
00:15:19.226 --> 00:15:19.406
Yeah.

368
00:15:19.466 --> 00:15:20.748
Because you can slow down.

369
00:15:20.768 --> 00:15:22.069
Because you can have the conversation.

370
00:15:22.089 --> 00:15:22.389
Yes.

371
00:15:22.429 --> 00:15:24.211
Like, babe, can you slow down this go around, honey?

372
00:15:24.231 --> 00:15:25.773
Because you were, like, moving really fast.

373
00:15:25.833 --> 00:15:26.514
And I didn't like that.

374
00:15:26.534 --> 00:15:28.015
Like, I'm not into rabbit fucking.

375
00:15:28.355 --> 00:15:28.816
Yeah.

376
00:15:29.216 --> 00:15:29.677
Yeah.

377
00:15:30.538 --> 00:15:31.339
I'm not with that.

378
00:15:31.579 --> 00:15:32.219
I'm not with that.

379
00:15:32.620 --> 00:15:32.740
Mm-mm.

380
00:15:33.080 --> 00:15:33.620
No, thank you.

381
00:15:33.640 --> 00:15:37.701
Maybe in the younger day where it was, you know, we didn't know no better because we didn't know our bodies.

382
00:15:37.721 --> 00:15:38.442
I was going to say we didn't know.

383
00:15:38.462 --> 00:15:38.882
That's what I mean.

384
00:15:38.902 --> 00:15:40.102
We didn't know our bodies.

385
00:15:40.182 --> 00:15:41.643
So it was like, oh, this is what we're doing?

386
00:15:41.703 --> 00:15:42.303
Okay, cool.

387
00:15:42.323 --> 00:15:43.023
You know, I have a hole.

388
00:15:43.043 --> 00:15:43.883
You're going to put something in it.

389
00:15:43.943 --> 00:15:44.843
And we just finished.

390
00:15:44.883 --> 00:15:45.364
Okay, great.

391
00:15:45.384 --> 00:15:45.804
Okay, cool.

392
00:15:46.044 --> 00:15:46.364
Right?

393
00:15:46.504 --> 00:15:48.425
Now it's like I didn't get anything out of this.

394
00:15:48.885 --> 00:15:51.665
Like not mentally, not physically, not emotionally.

395
00:15:51.685 --> 00:15:53.166
Like what was the big deal about this?

396
00:15:53.226 --> 00:15:53.646
Yeah.

397
00:15:53.726 --> 00:15:53.886
Yeah.

398
00:15:54.046 --> 00:15:54.446
This was.

399
00:15:54.906 --> 00:15:58.587
And you left feeling so high and I'm left feeling like what the fuck did I get out of that?

400
00:15:58.848 --> 00:16:00.148
I'm left feeling with the rose.

401
00:16:00.168 --> 00:16:00.448
Yeah.

402
00:16:01.678 --> 00:16:02.620
in a glass of water.

403
00:16:03.421 --> 00:16:05.884
Because I don't know what this was right here.

404
00:16:05.904 --> 00:16:07.246
So now I got to go ahead and finish it all.

405
00:16:07.286 --> 00:16:08.528
And that would piss me off.

406
00:16:09.349 --> 00:16:10.450
That would piss me off.

407
00:16:11.832 --> 00:16:12.432
For real.

408
00:16:12.452 --> 00:16:13.213
If you want to go in there.

409
00:16:13.673 --> 00:16:14.274
And say, you know what?

410
00:16:14.294 --> 00:16:15.935
I'm going to have to just finish it off tonight.

411
00:16:16.355 --> 00:16:16.796
Myself.

412
00:16:17.036 --> 00:16:17.836
Don't piss me off.

413
00:16:18.077 --> 00:16:19.458
Yeah, no, because I want us to play together.

414
00:16:20.038 --> 00:16:20.598
Exactly.

415
00:16:20.899 --> 00:16:31.026
And if you did happen to, like, disappoint or you... We all could feel when things just didn't go the way we intended or, like, you know, I mean, at least play together.

416
00:16:31.066 --> 00:16:33.588
Don't just get up, oh, that was great, and just go about your business.

417
00:16:33.628 --> 00:16:33.908
Right.

418
00:16:34.088 --> 00:16:36.510
Because then I would be like, you are fucking delusional.

419
00:16:36.530 --> 00:16:36.630
Yeah.

420
00:16:38.280 --> 00:16:40.883
And I don't think I want to see you again.

421
00:16:41.203 --> 00:16:41.603
Yeah.

422
00:16:41.783 --> 00:16:42.884
Or you're going to be the homie.

423
00:16:42.924 --> 00:16:43.065
Yeah.

424
00:16:43.485 --> 00:16:45.186
You're going to be the homie.

425
00:16:45.807 --> 00:16:47.469
You get friend-zoned real quick.

426
00:16:48.009 --> 00:16:48.249
Yeah.

427
00:16:48.269 --> 00:16:48.489
Yeah.

428
00:16:48.610 --> 00:16:48.890
Been there.

429
00:16:48.910 --> 00:16:50.251
I've friend-zoned before.

430
00:16:50.511 --> 00:16:50.932
Same.

431
00:16:50.952 --> 00:16:51.833
Same here.

432
00:16:52.113 --> 00:16:54.735
I have definitely, definitely friend-zoned before and after.

433
00:16:54.795 --> 00:16:55.276
Before...

434
00:16:56.047 --> 00:17:01.553
Because I was just like, yeah, no, I couldn't see myself dealing with this individual in no capacity other than a friend.

435
00:17:01.794 --> 00:17:06.780
And then after when it was like, oh, honey, that's all you have?

436
00:17:06.900 --> 00:17:07.821
I know for sure.

437
00:17:08.021 --> 00:17:10.544
I'd be like the rest of the people in the world, right?

438
00:17:10.564 --> 00:17:10.904
Cheating.

439
00:17:11.145 --> 00:17:11.445
Cheating.

440
00:17:11.885 --> 00:17:14.827
It just wouldn't suffice.

441
00:17:15.187 --> 00:17:19.270
As sexual as I am, it just wouldn't, it would not work.

442
00:17:19.530 --> 00:17:19.951
Yeah.

443
00:17:20.071 --> 00:17:20.911
I mean, I have a friend.

444
00:17:20.971 --> 00:17:29.317
I had a friend similar to that, but he, you know, of course got upset and decided he didn't want to be friends anymore.

445
00:17:29.557 --> 00:17:33.880
But like how you were saying, initially it was like, I don't see us going that route.

446
00:17:34.400 --> 00:17:35.161
And it did go that route.

447
00:17:35.241 --> 00:17:36.361
And it wasn't that it was bad.

448
00:17:36.381 --> 00:17:38.603
You just felt like it was going to mess the friendship up.

449
00:17:39.763 --> 00:17:40.724
I enjoyed myself.

450
00:17:41.025 --> 00:17:46.873
However, we said that it wasn't going to be anything beyond our friendship.

451
00:17:47.614 --> 00:17:50.278
And now that we had done that, okay, we can do that from time to time.

452
00:17:51.357 --> 00:17:53.198
But it wasn't ever going to be anything serious.

453
00:17:53.599 --> 00:17:53.919
Got you.

454
00:17:54.099 --> 00:17:54.680
I kept...

455
00:17:55.220 --> 00:17:56.641
Sounds like a little maintenance man, y'all.

456
00:17:56.841 --> 00:17:57.342
Yeah.

457
00:17:57.402 --> 00:17:58.663
And I kept my obligation.

458
00:17:58.803 --> 00:17:59.804
I didn't catch feelings.

459
00:18:00.564 --> 00:18:01.085
He did.

460
00:18:01.225 --> 00:18:01.505
Yes.

461
00:18:01.765 --> 00:18:08.430
And then he kind of went too far and got a little too rough and, like, too aggressive in a situation.

462
00:18:08.570 --> 00:18:11.313
And I was just like, yeah, you will never sniff her again.

463
00:18:11.573 --> 00:18:12.193
Yeah.

464
00:18:12.213 --> 00:18:13.955
You will never get that ever again.

465
00:18:13.975 --> 00:18:14.335
Yeah.

466
00:18:14.815 --> 00:18:15.456
And I meant that shit.

467
00:18:15.476 --> 00:18:17.418
Sniff her is definitely some shit I would say.

468
00:18:17.918 --> 00:18:22.523
Because baby wouldn't even catch the smell, the drift, the aroma.

469
00:18:22.543 --> 00:18:24.485
The wind of her won't even catch you again.

470
00:18:25.025 --> 00:18:28.708
And so from there, it was just like every time we would hang out, he was just so bitter.

471
00:18:30.030 --> 00:18:32.472
So after that, it just got to the point where it just didn't work.

472
00:18:32.892 --> 00:18:34.013
Take your bitter ass on.

473
00:18:34.033 --> 00:18:34.194
Yeah.

474
00:18:35.054 --> 00:18:37.595
Okay, we hope that you done found a new tune she the loved one.

475
00:18:37.675 --> 00:18:37.855
I do.

476
00:18:37.955 --> 00:18:38.935
I do hope that.

477
00:18:39.035 --> 00:18:39.915
I do hope that.

478
00:18:40.155 --> 00:18:43.236
You know, because, I mean, I knew him a very long time.

479
00:18:43.256 --> 00:18:45.596
Since I was like maybe 11 years old.

480
00:18:46.336 --> 00:18:47.136
Oh, wow.

481
00:18:47.256 --> 00:18:48.696
Yeah, long time.

482
00:18:49.457 --> 00:18:49.917
Yeah.

483
00:18:50.477 --> 00:18:51.777
So, you know, all the best love.

484
00:18:51.817 --> 00:18:52.777
It just didn't work over here.

485
00:18:53.097 --> 00:18:53.337
Right.

486
00:18:53.557 --> 00:18:54.057
And that's fine.

487
00:18:54.497 --> 00:18:54.978
That happens.

488
00:18:54.998 --> 00:18:55.418
That happens.

489
00:18:55.438 --> 00:18:56.018
That happens.

490
00:18:57.498 --> 00:19:02.759
Why do you think that people are so uncomfortable with talking about

491
00:19:05.502 --> 00:19:05.922
sex?

492
00:19:06.743 --> 00:19:07.963
I think it's an embarrassment.

493
00:19:08.023 --> 00:19:08.984
I think it's taboo.

494
00:19:09.044 --> 00:19:11.105
I think people just, we're raised that way.

495
00:19:11.125 --> 00:19:18.649
We're raised to like, we're raised to think that it's inappropriate to just have certain conversations and so it becomes like.

496
00:19:18.669 --> 00:19:19.630
That it's appropriate to do it.

497
00:19:20.110 --> 00:19:20.370
Right.

498
00:19:20.710 --> 00:19:22.031
You know what?

499
00:19:22.431 --> 00:19:22.931
Continue.

500
00:19:23.092 --> 00:19:25.993
But at the same time, it's something you do behind closed doors.

501
00:19:26.013 --> 00:19:27.254
You don't have an open setting.

502
00:19:27.334 --> 00:19:33.077
Especially as women, you know, it's not ladylike.

503
00:19:33.460 --> 00:19:40.586
to have those type of conversations or to bring that up or to be vocal about what it is that you want and what it is that you like.

504
00:19:40.966 --> 00:19:41.267
You know.

505
00:19:41.867 --> 00:19:45.570
To your friend group or to the partners that you're dealing with?

506
00:19:45.670 --> 00:19:48.152
I just think in... Well, with your partner...

507
00:19:48.893 --> 00:19:51.254
I think you should, you know, bring things up.

508
00:19:51.274 --> 00:19:55.775
But I feel like us just being vocal and open about sexuality in general is looked down upon.

509
00:19:55.976 --> 00:19:57.016
Yeah, I agree.

510
00:19:57.196 --> 00:19:57.476
Yeah.

511
00:19:58.076 --> 00:19:59.277
I totally, totally agree.

512
00:19:59.897 --> 00:20:02.138
And I don't know why, because, I mean, we're human too.

513
00:20:02.318 --> 00:20:03.138
We're grown as fuck.

514
00:20:03.298 --> 00:20:03.718
Yes.

515
00:20:03.878 --> 00:20:07.180
And we can have these conversations with each other, with our partners.

516
00:20:07.260 --> 00:20:07.760
Yeah.

517
00:20:07.780 --> 00:20:08.420
Like, I don't understand.

518
00:20:08.440 --> 00:20:10.701
I can tell you, hey, I don't like when you do this.

519
00:20:10.841 --> 00:20:12.041
Or, hey, I love when you do this.

520
00:20:12.121 --> 00:20:13.902
Or, hey, can we try doing this?

521
00:20:14.649 --> 00:20:17.151
I saw this thing I kind of like and I want to try it.

522
00:20:17.191 --> 00:20:18.212
It looks interesting.

523
00:20:18.312 --> 00:20:19.493
Yeah.

524
00:20:19.513 --> 00:20:20.894
Let's see if we like it together.

525
00:20:22.054 --> 00:20:25.457
Hmm.

526
00:20:29.980 --> 00:20:30.661
Ooh.

527
00:20:30.681 --> 00:20:32.142
Here we go with this communication piece.

528
00:20:32.262 --> 00:20:32.562
Uh-oh.

529
00:20:33.543 --> 00:20:35.484
Can great communication improve intimacy?

530
00:20:35.784 --> 00:20:36.425
Hell yeah.

531
00:20:36.525 --> 00:20:37.145
Absolutely.

532
00:20:37.386 --> 00:20:37.786
Hell yeah.

533
00:20:37.806 --> 00:20:38.807
Like you were just saying.

534
00:20:38.827 --> 00:20:39.807
Like you were just saying.

535
00:20:39.847 --> 00:20:42.810
Like I'm going to let you know that I didn't like that or I did like that.

536
00:20:42.830 --> 00:20:43.030
Mm-hmm.

537
00:20:43.748 --> 00:20:44.709
It can be better the next time.

538
00:20:44.729 --> 00:20:48.131
They'll be more conscious of what you like.

539
00:20:48.151 --> 00:20:51.893
I think, like you said, people will learn your body more that way.

540
00:20:52.193 --> 00:20:52.673
I agree.

541
00:20:52.693 --> 00:20:53.534
To have the conversation.

542
00:20:53.574 --> 00:20:54.594
It's a hard conversation.

543
00:20:54.614 --> 00:20:56.416
Like I said, I don't like having those conversations.

544
00:20:56.576 --> 00:20:57.236
Right.

545
00:20:57.396 --> 00:21:02.239
But if it's somebody that you are really invested in, you kind of have to.

546
00:21:02.719 --> 00:21:03.440
You know, you can't...

547
00:21:04.020 --> 00:21:10.064
If you really like a person, you can't throw it all away because you weren't able to have that conversation.

548
00:21:10.504 --> 00:21:10.884
Yeah.

549
00:21:11.304 --> 00:21:12.205
You know, so...

550
00:21:13.583 --> 00:21:14.143
I like that.

551
00:21:14.263 --> 00:21:16.464
Okay.

552
00:21:16.724 --> 00:21:17.804
Oh my goodness.

553
00:21:19.164 --> 00:21:28.126
How often should couples check in about intimacy and not just sexual?

554
00:21:28.246 --> 00:21:35.267
Cause I know that that's what the small brains out there are thinking, not just sexual, but just like just intimate moments.

555
00:21:35.307 --> 00:21:36.548
Like I can have an intimate moment.

556
00:21:36.568 --> 00:21:39.888
I can just put my feet in your lap and we just sitting there, we kind of vibing or whatever.

557
00:21:44.138 --> 00:21:47.739
Um, I can't really say how often, but I do think it's important.

558
00:21:48.199 --> 00:21:48.479
Okay.

559
00:21:48.559 --> 00:21:49.759
I think every couple is different.

560
00:21:49.779 --> 00:21:57.981
You can't really say, um, some people can go a long time without intimacy with their partner and still say, I mean, but I'm good.

561
00:21:58.061 --> 00:22:01.842
Like, you know, some people, some people don't, don't think that deep into it.

562
00:22:02.122 --> 00:22:05.703
Um, but there's other people, you know, you just got to know what your partner needs and.

563
00:22:06.303 --> 00:22:28.753
you know kind of go off that i don't think there's necessarily a time but is intimacy important yes you do need to um i feel like have some sort of intimacy in your relationship whether and whatever that schedule looks like for you and your significant other that's neither here nor there yeah so date nights us just checking in that type of thing

564
00:22:29.436 --> 00:22:34.242
You know, whether it's a handhold or a rub of the back or whatever it is.

565
00:22:34.282 --> 00:22:35.103
A little flower.

566
00:22:35.123 --> 00:22:37.366
Yeah, you know, a little kiss here and there.

567
00:22:37.426 --> 00:22:38.367
Lilies are my favorite.

568
00:22:38.387 --> 00:22:40.029
Hey, I love a lilies as well.

569
00:22:40.109 --> 00:22:40.209
Yeah.

570
00:22:40.229 --> 00:22:42.592
Give me some lilies and some flowers, okay?

571
00:22:43.012 --> 00:22:44.634
And then we can go in and throw the roses in there.

572
00:22:44.674 --> 00:22:45.756
Just give me a whole little bouquet.

573
00:22:46.016 --> 00:22:46.436
I'm cool with it.

574
00:22:46.456 --> 00:22:47.678
Those are the most beautiful flowers.

575
00:22:47.698 --> 00:22:48.599
Those are my favorites as well.

576
00:22:48.699 --> 00:22:49.380
I love them, same.

577
00:22:49.660 --> 00:22:52.242
See, that's why it's my sister wife over here.

578
00:22:52.342 --> 00:22:53.763
Yes, ma'am.

579
00:22:54.023 --> 00:22:55.684
I love, love, love them.

580
00:22:55.704 --> 00:22:58.446
I'm telling you, my whole kitchen right now is all sunflowers.

581
00:22:58.466 --> 00:23:00.168
And I know that we're about to go into the fall.

582
00:23:00.588 --> 00:23:02.509
So now I'm over here like, can I leave it?

583
00:23:04.050 --> 00:23:04.351
You know.

584
00:23:04.471 --> 00:23:05.351
It is really pretty.

585
00:23:05.651 --> 00:23:06.112
Yeah.

586
00:23:06.132 --> 00:23:08.634
I'm just like, oh, it's so pretty.

587
00:23:08.654 --> 00:23:09.995
Sunflowers, sunflowers.

588
00:23:11.396 --> 00:23:11.636
Ooh.

589
00:23:16.954 --> 00:23:17.834
Now this is a big one.

590
00:23:18.174 --> 00:23:19.075
She got me nervous.

591
00:23:19.175 --> 00:23:20.295
Okay.

592
00:23:20.435 --> 00:23:25.916
Is sexual chemistry enough to sustain a relationship?

593
00:23:25.956 --> 00:23:26.616
No, it is not.

594
00:23:27.916 --> 00:23:28.576
No, it is not.

595
00:23:28.977 --> 00:23:29.877
So you know what you said?

596
00:23:30.037 --> 00:23:38.178
You know, you said last episode that you cannot fuck someone in submission.

597
00:23:38.598 --> 00:23:38.839
Mm-hmm.

598
00:23:40.119 --> 00:23:41.079
And I think.

599
00:23:41.526 --> 00:23:45.768
That there are so many individuals that think that that's really a real thing.

600
00:23:45.968 --> 00:23:46.228
Mm-hmm.

601
00:23:46.608 --> 00:23:47.969
And it is, in fact, not.

602
00:23:48.089 --> 00:23:48.729
It is not.

603
00:23:48.889 --> 00:23:49.149
Yeah.

604
00:23:49.249 --> 00:23:49.869
It is not.

605
00:23:50.470 --> 00:23:54.371
The only person that you're going to be in a relationship with is someone who wants to be in a relationship.

606
00:23:55.512 --> 00:23:55.612
Mm.

607
00:23:56.092 --> 00:23:56.392
You know.

608
00:23:56.412 --> 00:23:56.872
Say that again.

609
00:23:56.912 --> 00:23:57.693
Look at the camera and tell me.

610
00:23:57.953 --> 00:24:02.915
The only person that you can be in a relationship with is someone who wants to be in a relationship.

611
00:24:03.055 --> 00:24:03.535
That's right.

612
00:24:03.615 --> 00:24:04.596
I had a really good friend.

613
00:24:05.296 --> 00:24:08.837
And we had some amazing times, you know, as far as intimacy.

614
00:24:09.097 --> 00:24:09.838
Yeah.

615
00:24:10.238 --> 00:24:10.458
And...

616
00:24:11.780 --> 00:24:14.262
In the beginning, I just wanted to be in a relationship so bad.

617
00:24:14.282 --> 00:24:16.425
I wanted us to be together so bad, so bad, so bad.

618
00:24:16.465 --> 00:24:17.626
And he just was like, no.

619
00:24:18.046 --> 00:24:18.967
But that's not what we're doing.

620
00:24:18.987 --> 00:24:23.852
I literally had to just say, okay, if that's, you know, if all we're going to do was...

621
00:24:23.872 --> 00:24:27.515
But, like, I thought we went together because why would you do that?

622
00:24:27.695 --> 00:24:30.018
Why would you do my body like that and then say we don't go together?

623
00:24:30.258 --> 00:24:30.598
But...

624
00:24:31.519 --> 00:24:39.363
If all we're going to do is have the most amazing, intimate conversations, talk about our lives, you know, and then have great sex.

625
00:24:39.903 --> 00:24:41.203
If that's what this is, okay, cool.

626
00:24:41.223 --> 00:24:43.204
I'm going to compartmentalize that.

627
00:24:43.384 --> 00:24:43.645
Yes.

628
00:24:44.125 --> 00:24:48.547
Accept it for the winners and just know that if I ever needed this person, he was always there for me.

629
00:24:48.647 --> 00:24:52.348
But he set boundaries with what it was that he wanted, and I had to accept that.

630
00:24:52.669 --> 00:24:52.869
Yeah.

631
00:24:52.889 --> 00:24:55.370
Which was hard at first because I have always been able to—

632
00:24:56.495 --> 00:24:58.897
beat niggas in the head and say, we go together.

633
00:24:59.057 --> 00:24:59.998
Yeah, for sure.

634
00:25:00.018 --> 00:25:00.538
And we're together.

635
00:25:00.778 --> 00:25:01.179
You know?

636
00:25:01.519 --> 00:25:02.760
And he was just not rocking with that shit.

637
00:25:02.780 --> 00:25:03.901
Because who's saying no to us?

638
00:25:03.921 --> 00:25:04.802
Because who's saying no?

639
00:25:04.862 --> 00:25:05.482
What the fuck?

640
00:25:05.542 --> 00:25:06.843
Like, uh-uh.

641
00:25:07.003 --> 00:25:08.985
I'm low-key insulted.

642
00:25:09.946 --> 00:25:11.567
Like, I had a friend like that, though.

643
00:25:11.587 --> 00:25:14.029
I got a friend right now, and we're still friends to this day.

644
00:25:14.549 --> 00:25:18.692
And I was like, because everybody always talks about, like, Lala, you know everybody likes you.

645
00:25:18.773 --> 00:25:19.833
Like, even your male friends.

646
00:25:19.853 --> 00:25:21.355
You can't have strictly platonic friends.

647
00:25:21.375 --> 00:25:23.196
And I'm just like, nope, everybody doesn't like me.

648
00:25:23.236 --> 00:25:24.357
Like, I'm not everybody's cup of tea.

649
00:25:24.477 --> 00:25:24.837
Right.

650
00:25:24.857 --> 00:25:27.539
Like, I know I'm in a quiet taste, okay?

651
00:25:27.559 --> 00:25:28.960
I know it, and it's okay.

652
00:25:29.660 --> 00:25:32.261
And he told me, he was like, yeah, no, I wouldn't dare.

653
00:25:32.321 --> 00:25:32.942
I wouldn't touch you.

654
00:25:32.962 --> 00:25:34.483
And I was like, damn, nigga, don't say it like that.

655
00:25:34.583 --> 00:25:35.643
Okay, you could have reworded.

656
00:25:35.683 --> 00:25:36.924
You didn't have to word it like that.

657
00:25:36.944 --> 00:25:37.224
Like, what?

658
00:25:37.244 --> 00:25:37.764
What you mean?

659
00:25:37.784 --> 00:25:38.625
What you trying to say?

660
00:25:39.245 --> 00:25:41.627
But it's like, no, like, you my dog.

661
00:25:41.807 --> 00:25:42.267
Yeah.

662
00:25:42.527 --> 00:25:44.108
And I respect that, you know what I'm saying?

663
00:25:44.128 --> 00:25:46.269
Because that's my dog, and you my dog, and you know who I'm talking to?

664
00:25:46.930 --> 00:25:51.512
Like, but literally, Strictly Platonic, like, this is my ace, Boon Coon.

665
00:25:51.552 --> 00:25:52.233
It has been great.

666
00:25:53.193 --> 00:25:54.394
My age since sixth grade.

667
00:25:54.634 --> 00:25:55.415
Wow.

668
00:25:55.495 --> 00:25:56.116
Sixth grade.

669
00:25:56.156 --> 00:25:57.797
And we still rock with each other.

670
00:25:57.817 --> 00:25:58.738
Gotta cherish that.

671
00:25:58.778 --> 00:25:59.839
Listen to me.

672
00:25:59.899 --> 00:26:01.860
That is my dog.

673
00:26:02.421 --> 00:26:03.281
But it's never...

674
00:26:04.102 --> 00:26:07.845
There is people that are in your life that can be platonic.

675
00:26:07.885 --> 00:26:11.128
And I think that we have to normalize, once again, another taboo topic...

676
00:26:11.578 --> 00:26:14.320
Can women and men have the opposite sex be friends?

677
00:26:14.540 --> 00:26:15.801
I definitely believe so.

678
00:26:16.001 --> 00:26:16.922
I believe so as well.

679
00:26:17.102 --> 00:26:30.592
And I also believe that sometimes in relationships, what I've recognized with some of my friends that are in relationships, some of my male friends, they are missing things in their relationship that they perhaps may see that I do in my friendship.

680
00:26:31.012 --> 00:26:34.755
And then they start like putting whatever...

681
00:26:35.452 --> 00:27:03.968
narrative in their head like oh I think that I like Lala no it's not that you like me you just like what I do and you like my friendship and because I cater to you and your woman doesn't do that you feel a way but I'm going to cater to you know my men I'm going to cater to my friends like that's just me that's just my personality you know what I mean but I'm not this ain't that like we're friends you know and I'm going to draw that line and that boundary like yeah no I'm good I can't be all over the place with my friends you know

682
00:27:05.085 --> 00:27:05.385
Right.

683
00:27:06.386 --> 00:27:08.226
Oh, I think we touched on this a bit.

684
00:27:08.266 --> 00:27:10.927
It's talking about sex, a turn-on, or a mood killer.

685
00:27:11.387 --> 00:27:13.068
I guess it depends on when we're talking about it, right?

686
00:27:13.168 --> 00:27:13.908
Yeah.

687
00:27:14.368 --> 00:27:15.669
You mean, like, bringing up the topic?

688
00:27:16.109 --> 00:27:16.709
Yes.

689
00:27:18.630 --> 00:27:19.530
It depends on when.

690
00:27:19.590 --> 00:27:20.630
It depends on how.

691
00:27:21.991 --> 00:27:27.693
Like, you can't just, oh, on date one, oh, what's your favorite position?

692
00:27:27.713 --> 00:27:27.993
Yeah.

693
00:27:28.407 --> 00:27:29.307
That's going to throw me off.

694
00:27:29.427 --> 00:27:31.628
We sitting at the dinner table, nigga, pass the rolls.

695
00:27:31.648 --> 00:27:32.428
What the fuck?

696
00:27:32.628 --> 00:27:35.929
Like, can you give me a little bit of butter on my bread?

697
00:27:36.009 --> 00:27:36.330
Right.

698
00:27:36.350 --> 00:27:37.550
And don't we think about buttering me?

699
00:27:38.190 --> 00:27:38.810
Please.

700
00:27:39.030 --> 00:27:40.391
Like, get to know me a little bit.

701
00:27:40.431 --> 00:27:40.951
Damn.

702
00:27:41.111 --> 00:27:42.351
Have some koof, y'all.

703
00:27:42.391 --> 00:27:42.992
Like, my God.

704
00:27:43.032 --> 00:27:43.672
Come on now.

705
00:27:43.792 --> 00:27:44.492
Come on now.

706
00:27:47.614 --> 00:27:48.595
I don't think it's a turn off.

707
00:27:48.615 --> 00:27:54.698
I think that the only time it would be a turn off for me is that if we're in, we're hot and steamy and ready.

708
00:27:55.858 --> 00:28:00.140
But for me to get into that space or whatever, we had to already have all those conversations then out of the way.

709
00:28:00.160 --> 00:28:00.740
Right.

710
00:28:00.760 --> 00:28:01.241
You know what I mean?

711
00:28:01.261 --> 00:28:02.341
So you know it's a safe space.

712
00:28:02.441 --> 00:28:02.821
Yes.

713
00:28:03.122 --> 00:28:03.562
I agree.

714
00:28:03.582 --> 00:28:05.083
And we already know what the expectation is.

715
00:28:05.103 --> 00:28:08.104
Because I've been in a situation where, I mean, I was hot and ready.

716
00:28:08.144 --> 00:28:08.404
Okay?

717
00:28:08.424 --> 00:28:10.465
I'm talking about, I was in that joint like Krispy Kreme donuts.

718
00:28:10.545 --> 00:28:10.705
Okay?

719
00:28:10.725 --> 00:28:11.826
Little Caesar's pizza.

720
00:28:12.546 --> 00:28:13.467
I was prepped and ready.

721
00:28:14.127 --> 00:28:15.087
The light was on.

722
00:28:15.388 --> 00:28:15.848
Listen.

723
00:28:16.508 --> 00:28:21.129
But I got turned off, y'all, and I'm telling you, I think that my vajay lips folded back in the inside of me.

724
00:28:21.229 --> 00:28:22.229
I'm hollering.

725
00:28:22.289 --> 00:28:28.951
Because this gentleman just knew that he was ready to get, he was ready to roll and dog.

726
00:28:29.091 --> 00:28:29.731
That's it.

727
00:28:30.471 --> 00:28:33.112
Yeah, that's a turn off because to me, that means you do that with everybody.

728
00:28:33.132 --> 00:28:33.852
That's my point.

729
00:28:34.132 --> 00:28:34.572
Yeah.

730
00:28:35.013 --> 00:28:35.853
How, Sway?

731
00:28:36.073 --> 00:28:36.513
Yeah.

732
00:28:36.533 --> 00:28:40.794
Like, yes, we've been kicking it for a few months now, but you thought that you was just about to...

733
00:28:42.225 --> 00:28:42.745
Go where?

734
00:28:42.805 --> 00:28:43.506
Just jump up in.

735
00:28:44.246 --> 00:28:45.146
Oh, no thank you.

736
00:28:45.206 --> 00:28:50.489
Because I promise you, we got different sizes and colors and whatever it is, other rubbers that you're into, sweet pea.

737
00:28:50.769 --> 00:28:51.990
So we're going to go ahead and grab you one.

738
00:28:52.250 --> 00:28:53.951
But now you done lost the privilege to do that.

739
00:28:53.971 --> 00:28:56.632
Because now I look at you like, gross.

740
00:28:56.672 --> 00:28:57.693
I'm a little disgusted by you.

741
00:28:57.773 --> 00:28:58.313
Exactly.

742
00:28:59.342 --> 00:29:03.865
Even you told me and showed me, you know, your paperwork and all these things or whatever the case may be.

743
00:29:03.965 --> 00:29:04.625
It just doesn't.

744
00:29:04.866 --> 00:29:05.946
Because you showed me that paperwork.

745
00:29:05.966 --> 00:29:07.127
But let's be crystal clear.

746
00:29:07.207 --> 00:29:07.547
And I think.

747
00:29:07.567 --> 00:29:08.508
That was two months ago.

748
00:29:08.528 --> 00:29:09.669
No, man.

749
00:29:09.689 --> 00:29:11.530
You could not say before yesterday.

750
00:29:11.550 --> 00:29:12.510
Regardless of the time.

751
00:29:12.891 --> 00:29:16.913
Men are sometimes so fucking, like, oblivious and just do not think.

752
00:29:17.173 --> 00:29:17.434
Yes.

753
00:29:17.614 --> 00:29:19.795
And I think he was like, well, I showed her my papers.

754
00:29:19.815 --> 00:29:21.196
So we must about to be going raw.

755
00:29:21.416 --> 00:29:21.616
Yeah.

756
00:29:21.876 --> 00:29:22.197
Like.

757
00:29:23.157 --> 00:29:23.498
Sir.

758
00:29:23.778 --> 00:29:24.278
Just because.

759
00:29:24.298 --> 00:29:24.358
No.

760
00:29:25.639 --> 00:29:25.959
What?

761
00:29:26.499 --> 00:29:27.120
Absolutely not.

762
00:29:28.436 --> 00:29:30.599
I'm just like, Lord, bless their hearts.

763
00:29:30.639 --> 00:29:31.600
Bless their hearts.

764
00:29:31.700 --> 00:29:35.604
And we have to blame their mind because it's not their heart.

765
00:29:35.965 --> 00:29:36.505
I don't think.

766
00:29:36.565 --> 00:29:37.526
Like, some of them, yes.

767
00:29:37.586 --> 00:29:39.749
But some of them, you know, I really don't think.

768
00:29:39.789 --> 00:29:41.951
I think that they're just like, they're just airheads.

769
00:29:42.052 --> 00:29:42.732
And they are...

770
00:29:43.579 --> 00:29:45.580
You know, women are from Mars.

771
00:29:46.140 --> 00:29:50.803
I think there also are some women who go for anything and they want to see how far you'll let them go.

772
00:29:51.023 --> 00:29:52.564
Are you one of those or are you one of those?

773
00:29:52.904 --> 00:29:57.186
And see, if you was one of those and I was a man, my shit would go back in my navel.

774
00:29:57.506 --> 00:29:59.728
Because it would be like, she just going to let me.

775
00:29:59.748 --> 00:30:00.568
I don't even know her last name.

776
00:30:00.628 --> 00:30:01.388
I don't even know her.

777
00:30:01.408 --> 00:30:02.349
She just going to let me.

778
00:30:02.869 --> 00:30:03.830
That's my point.

779
00:30:04.090 --> 00:30:05.390
Like, how does this even work?

780
00:30:05.451 --> 00:30:08.152
And it's unfortunately, there's a lot of them out there that would still fuck her.

781
00:30:09.243 --> 00:30:10.865
And that's the unfortunate part.

782
00:30:10.905 --> 00:30:11.305
Yeah.

783
00:30:11.925 --> 00:30:13.047
It is super unfortunate.

784
00:30:13.067 --> 00:30:13.647
It's disturbing.

785
00:30:14.288 --> 00:30:14.808
Extremely.

786
00:30:15.068 --> 00:30:17.551
But this is why we have to have these conversation, guys.

787
00:30:17.571 --> 00:30:19.172
Like, we have to have the conversations.

788
00:30:19.192 --> 00:30:22.075
We got to take the stigma from around, like, all of it, right?

789
00:30:22.135 --> 00:30:22.955
Especially sex.

790
00:30:22.996 --> 00:30:26.439
And sex is something that we should be able to talk about if we're doing it, right?

791
00:30:26.499 --> 00:30:27.279
Like, we're hunching.

792
00:30:27.500 --> 00:30:30.682
I burnt myself on my neck sidebar with a curling iron.

793
00:30:30.723 --> 00:30:34.246
Do you know I had a gentleman ask me, is that a hickey on your neck, sweetheart?

794
00:30:35.147 --> 00:30:36.768
No, I burnt myself with a curling iron.

795
00:30:36.908 --> 00:30:37.209
Okay?

796
00:30:37.229 --> 00:30:39.291
So for everybody that thinks it's a hickey, it's a burn mark.

797
00:30:39.311 --> 00:30:40.392
I burnt myself curling my hair.

798
00:30:40.412 --> 00:30:42.554
You see, I got a lot of hair looking like a little lioness over here.

799
00:30:42.715 --> 00:30:43.555
Yeah.

800
00:30:43.856 --> 00:30:44.757
But I burnt myself.

801
00:30:45.377 --> 00:30:48.641
And it made me think, like, I know we fucking.

802
00:30:49.662 --> 00:30:50.543
We know we fucking.

803
00:30:51.298 --> 00:30:53.919
Why on earth do I want you to mark me up?

804
00:30:53.959 --> 00:30:54.559
That's some shit.

805
00:30:54.579 --> 00:30:55.500
That's some kid shit.

806
00:30:55.720 --> 00:30:56.380
It's kid shit.

807
00:30:56.520 --> 00:30:57.240
You don't have to.

808
00:30:57.641 --> 00:30:59.841
And I don't want you sucking on me that damn hard any damn way.

809
00:30:59.861 --> 00:31:00.882
Yeah, that's a little painful.

810
00:31:01.042 --> 00:31:02.322
Yeah, no, I'm cool on that.

811
00:31:02.403 --> 00:31:02.703
Yeah.

812
00:31:03.183 --> 00:31:04.603
I don't want little blood cloths everywhere.

813
00:31:04.623 --> 00:31:07.885
The only thing that I get, only time I get the little blood cloth things is when I get cupping.

814
00:31:08.685 --> 00:31:09.525
And that's when.

815
00:31:09.545 --> 00:31:10.626
I've been wanting to try that.

816
00:31:10.646 --> 00:31:11.246
You have to.

817
00:31:11.266 --> 00:31:12.146
I heard it's amazing.

818
00:31:12.186 --> 00:31:13.347
It is amazing.

819
00:31:13.407 --> 00:31:14.948
But it's definitely like you've been bruised.

820
00:31:15.228 --> 00:31:15.468
Mm-hmm.

821
00:31:16.248 --> 00:31:17.909
But it feels amazing.

822
00:31:17.949 --> 00:31:19.290
It's very, very helpful.

823
00:31:19.350 --> 00:31:21.291
I would suggest getting a shower and then going to get it.

824
00:31:21.311 --> 00:31:23.433
So that way you don't have to get in the shower when you get back.

825
00:31:23.533 --> 00:31:24.633
Because it's painful afterwards.

826
00:31:24.693 --> 00:31:24.994
Yeah.

827
00:31:25.074 --> 00:31:25.414
Okay.

828
00:31:25.834 --> 00:31:26.975
So I love, love, love.

829
00:31:26.995 --> 00:31:27.775
But I love cupping.

830
00:31:27.815 --> 00:31:31.718
I try to do it once a month or like once every two months.

831
00:31:31.918 --> 00:31:32.899
Okay.

832
00:31:33.139 --> 00:31:33.759
To go and get it.

833
00:31:33.799 --> 00:31:36.581
But it's an amazing experience between that and acupuncture.

834
00:31:36.601 --> 00:31:38.062
I swear to you, I just can't leave without it.

835
00:31:38.985 --> 00:31:39.786
Oh, and the massages.

836
00:31:40.366 --> 00:31:41.407
I do love a good massage.

837
00:31:41.427 --> 00:31:41.547
Yes.

838
00:31:41.587 --> 00:31:45.849
And I always tell myself I'm going to be better about being consistent with them, and I just have not.

839
00:31:46.269 --> 00:31:49.331
No, I got to do better with being consistent with my stretch.

840
00:31:49.872 --> 00:31:51.392
And it's amazing because...

841
00:31:52.957 --> 00:31:55.700
You know, one of my individuals is a stretch therapist.

842
00:31:56.501 --> 00:31:57.722
So it's no reason.

843
00:31:58.323 --> 00:32:00.966
And I can get folded all up and toe, whatever pretzel.

844
00:32:01.086 --> 00:32:01.887
I love that.

845
00:32:01.927 --> 00:32:02.347
Yes.

846
00:32:02.548 --> 00:32:04.890
And I don't go and I'm not consistent as I should be.

847
00:32:04.910 --> 00:32:10.977
But I promise, I'll be like, but we have to get this on the schedule where I'm coming like every Wednesday to get stretched.

848
00:32:11.417 --> 00:32:13.759
It's so important, especially as we age.

849
00:32:13.899 --> 00:32:14.920
Girl, because my hip.

850
00:32:14.940 --> 00:32:15.540
It's so important.

851
00:32:15.620 --> 00:32:16.781
I don't know what's going on with my hip.

852
00:32:16.841 --> 00:32:20.024
And, you know, women are, we hold a lot of tension.

853
00:32:20.064 --> 00:32:21.665
We hold a lot of trauma in our hips.

854
00:32:22.045 --> 00:32:22.606
Absolutely.

855
00:32:22.786 --> 00:32:26.029
So it's very important that you, like, really, really stretch your hips out.

856
00:32:26.049 --> 00:32:26.869
And your hips internal.

857
00:32:26.889 --> 00:32:32.774
Have you ever been having a conversation with somebody and, like, you wanted to say something, but you kind of, like, swallowed it and you could feel it in your stomach?

858
00:32:32.874 --> 00:32:33.294
Mm-hmm.

859
00:32:33.334 --> 00:32:36.697
That you, I really think that that's how we get sick, ladies.

860
00:32:36.837 --> 00:32:37.698
Oh, absolutely.

861
00:32:37.718 --> 00:32:38.438
They say you get ulcers.

862
00:32:38.458 --> 00:32:38.879
We get ulcers.

863
00:32:38.999 --> 00:32:39.799
Yeah.

864
00:32:39.939 --> 00:32:40.080
Yes.

865
00:32:40.120 --> 00:32:40.340
Mm-hmm.

866
00:32:40.840 --> 00:32:41.700
We have to do better at that.

867
00:32:41.720 --> 00:32:42.981
That stress in the pit of your stomach.

868
00:32:43.061 --> 00:32:43.581
Yeah, no.

869
00:32:43.681 --> 00:32:46.082
And we got to be vocal about the things that we want.

870
00:32:46.182 --> 00:32:48.163
We have to be vocal about everything.

871
00:32:48.283 --> 00:32:49.243
About our barriers.

872
00:32:49.343 --> 00:32:49.703
Yes.

873
00:32:50.083 --> 00:32:51.104
Our boundaries.

874
00:32:51.364 --> 00:32:53.444
Our every, everything.

875
00:32:53.484 --> 00:32:58.106
We have to, we got to get in the space of that because there's so much sickness and such going on.

876
00:32:58.986 --> 00:33:03.888
And we're kind of, you know, not even kind of, we're doing it to ourselves at the end of the day.

877
00:33:03.948 --> 00:33:04.908
And I think that that was me.

878
00:33:04.948 --> 00:33:09.050
Like, that's why everybody's always asking me, like, how are you so raw and uncut?

879
00:33:09.070 --> 00:33:09.550
And it's like,

880
00:33:10.358 --> 00:33:12.220
Because I was a people pleaser for so long.

881
00:33:12.280 --> 00:33:13.361
Me too.

882
00:33:13.621 --> 00:33:14.582
I was so nervous.

883
00:33:14.642 --> 00:33:17.044
For such a long time.

884
00:33:17.064 --> 00:33:19.026
I didn't want to have the hard conversations.

885
00:33:19.927 --> 00:33:21.748
They might not want to be my friend anymore.

886
00:33:21.768 --> 00:33:22.729
I don't give a fuck.

887
00:33:22.749 --> 00:33:23.370
Fuck them friends.

888
00:33:23.450 --> 00:33:24.231
Fuck them.

889
00:33:24.771 --> 00:33:25.232
Listen.

890
00:33:26.424 --> 00:33:28.326
The level of peace I have these days.

891
00:33:29.287 --> 00:33:29.947
I'm sorry.

892
00:33:29.967 --> 00:33:32.570
For just being real and being authentically you.

893
00:33:32.590 --> 00:33:33.971
Yeah, authentically you.

894
00:33:34.011 --> 00:33:35.452
And then you also attract that too.

895
00:33:35.532 --> 00:33:42.879
What I've recognized and realized, like, since I've been on this journey, I've attracted more of what I want in my life.

896
00:33:42.979 --> 00:33:43.639
More genuine.

897
00:33:43.800 --> 00:33:44.200
Yes.

898
00:33:44.700 --> 00:33:46.882
As opposed to people that are just there leeching.

899
00:33:46.922 --> 00:33:47.583
Because there are.

900
00:33:47.743 --> 00:33:53.387
Leeching or just on a whole different, in a whole different state of mind, a whole different focus.

901
00:33:53.407 --> 00:33:54.448
They're not even in the same book.

902
00:33:54.548 --> 00:33:55.549
Focus on fuck shit.

903
00:33:55.649 --> 00:33:56.830
Let alone the same page.

904
00:33:56.950 --> 00:33:57.570
Exactly.

905
00:33:57.591 --> 00:33:58.591
Yeah, for sure.

906
00:33:58.731 --> 00:33:59.512
And a different pace.

907
00:34:00.012 --> 00:34:00.293
Yes.

908
00:34:01.418 --> 00:34:01.858
I don't know.

909
00:34:02.178 --> 00:34:05.419
And I want, if you move at a snail's pace, that's your business, right?

910
00:34:05.619 --> 00:34:07.240
It's your journey at the end of the day.

911
00:34:07.380 --> 00:34:13.582
But where I'm going and where I'm headed and where I am currently, it's just like, I just don't have, I have a zero tolerance.

912
00:34:13.602 --> 00:34:14.983
Or who you choose to entertain.

913
00:34:15.383 --> 00:34:19.104
Like, even that to me, I'd be like, yeah, you just not on that level.

914
00:34:19.464 --> 00:34:20.405
You're not on that level yet.

915
00:34:20.425 --> 00:34:26.427
Because it's no way that we're at this big age still calling man-man off the block.

916
00:34:26.527 --> 00:34:27.067
That's your man?

917
00:34:27.807 --> 00:34:28.367
That's your nigga?

918
00:34:28.627 --> 00:34:28.988
Right.

919
00:34:29.248 --> 00:34:29.888
That's what you claiming?

920
00:34:29.908 --> 00:34:30.048
Right.

921
00:34:30.583 --> 00:34:32.104
Yeah, you're not on the level.

922
00:34:32.204 --> 00:34:35.587
Like, you literally... And he running up to my car every time I step out of it?

923
00:34:36.948 --> 00:34:38.669
Yeah, I'm okay.

924
00:34:38.789 --> 00:34:40.970
He asking to take me out, but he on foot.

925
00:34:41.031 --> 00:34:41.631
He on foot.

926
00:34:43.292 --> 00:34:44.073
Or on a little bike.

927
00:34:44.353 --> 00:34:45.254
And you know those little bikes?

928
00:34:45.274 --> 00:34:46.394
It's the other shit that pisses me off.

929
00:34:46.655 --> 00:34:49.437
The little ass bikes, y'all, excuse me for my little tangent.

930
00:34:49.737 --> 00:34:54.240
But the little bikes that there are for kids, but these grown ass men be on them.

931
00:34:54.260 --> 00:34:55.381
I don't know what that is about.

932
00:34:55.401 --> 00:34:56.221
Get your ass.

933
00:34:56.281 --> 00:34:59.063
I would much rather see your ass on a hoverboard or a scooter of some sort.

934
00:34:59.083 --> 00:34:59.784
Um...

935
00:34:59.964 --> 00:35:21.145
but baby get your ass off that kid bike okay and stop coming at this grown ass woman yes yes like what's wrong with you I commend the confidence like I do but please put that energy toward the car just bettering yourself like and the women who entertain that shit better yourself as well cause what the fuck yes

936
00:35:22.526 --> 00:35:36.923
he gonna come pick you up and say hey we gonna go to the movies tonight or he gonna no or you gonna go pick his ass up or he gonna be driving your car around exactly like at this big age there's certain shit that I just be flabbergasted that women of our I'm just I'm befuddled

937
00:35:39.635 --> 00:35:42.419
Women our age, you're really still doing it?

938
00:35:42.459 --> 00:35:43.781
And don't get me wrong, I had my days.

939
00:35:43.821 --> 00:35:46.264
My 20s, I was really fucking dumb.

940
00:35:46.504 --> 00:35:47.406
Oh, super damn dumb.

941
00:35:47.426 --> 00:35:48.167
Very fucking dumb.

942
00:35:48.187 --> 00:35:49.148
You can definitely look at it.

943
00:35:49.168 --> 00:35:52.352
You can even just tell, you know, like from back in the day to now.

944
00:35:52.392 --> 00:35:53.294
Just giving Bambi.

945
00:35:53.454 --> 00:35:54.355
Yes.

946
00:35:54.635 --> 00:35:54.996
Dits.

947
00:35:55.216 --> 00:35:55.617
That's it.

948
00:35:56.638 --> 00:35:58.840
Girl, it was crazy.

949
00:35:58.880 --> 00:35:59.580
It was craziness.

950
00:35:59.741 --> 00:36:04.284
But now you get older, you know your ones, and you stand on that shit.

951
00:36:04.304 --> 00:36:13.572
Like, regardless of whoever feels some type of way or whatever, like, I'm cool with always, and I'm so glad I love this about myself, is that I will stand dolo on some shit I believe.

952
00:36:13.872 --> 00:36:14.532
You should.

953
00:36:14.552 --> 00:36:15.593
Ten toes down.

954
00:36:15.613 --> 00:36:17.094
Like, I don't care if you don't care.

955
00:36:17.154 --> 00:36:18.835
I don't care if you feel a way.

956
00:36:18.855 --> 00:36:19.876
I just don't care.

957
00:36:20.016 --> 00:36:20.456
Right?

958
00:36:20.677 --> 00:36:22.518
And before previously, that would bother me.

959
00:36:22.538 --> 00:36:22.978
Me too.

960
00:36:23.178 --> 00:36:24.879
I'd be like, well, it would make me start.

961
00:36:24.899 --> 00:36:25.980
I'm trying to convince you.

962
00:36:26.220 --> 00:36:26.340
Why?

963
00:36:26.380 --> 00:36:31.544
Not only am I convincing, but I'm also second guessing myself because nobody else feels the same way.

964
00:36:31.564 --> 00:36:31.704
Yes.

965
00:36:31.724 --> 00:36:35.767
Or nobody else stepped in and said, oh, yeah, girl, you right.

966
00:36:35.807 --> 00:36:37.208
You know, I used to have to have like a.

967
00:36:37.228 --> 00:36:37.948
That validation.

968
00:36:37.988 --> 00:36:38.329
Yeah.

969
00:36:38.349 --> 00:36:40.070
I had to have what they call a peanut gallery.

970
00:36:40.230 --> 00:36:40.430
Got it.

971
00:36:40.910 --> 00:36:43.451
And now, fuck a peanut gallery.

972
00:36:43.771 --> 00:36:45.572
I am so solid in myself.

973
00:36:45.712 --> 00:36:47.252
I know that shit was wrong.

974
00:36:47.272 --> 00:36:48.613
You're not going to convince me otherwise.

975
00:36:48.673 --> 00:36:50.873
And your peanut gallery is not going to convince me otherwise.

976
00:36:51.533 --> 00:36:52.734
Fuck that shit.

977
00:36:53.354 --> 00:36:53.994
I'll stand alone.

978
00:36:54.714 --> 00:36:55.615
Same, girl.

979
00:36:55.795 --> 00:36:56.635
With the quickness.

980
00:36:56.675 --> 00:36:57.735
But luckily, I don't have to.

981
00:36:57.775 --> 00:37:00.136
I have some of the most amazing people in my life.

982
00:37:00.476 --> 00:37:01.617
Yes, you do.

983
00:37:01.857 --> 00:37:03.437
And you're such an amazing person.

984
00:37:03.537 --> 00:37:04.457
Oh, as are you.

985
00:37:04.738 --> 00:37:05.698
Thank you so much.

986
00:37:06.518 --> 00:37:07.419
I swear.

987
00:37:07.640 --> 00:37:08.561
Love her, love her.

988
00:37:08.681 --> 00:37:10.123
Damn, okay?

989
00:37:10.163 --> 00:37:11.444
Ditto, ditto, ditto.

990
00:37:11.865 --> 00:37:13.026
Yes, ma'am.

991
00:37:14.748 --> 00:37:16.049
Did you see that Polly word of the day?

992
00:37:16.710 --> 00:37:19.053
Let's see this Polly word of the day.

993
00:37:19.093 --> 00:37:20.394
I'm going to let you pronounce it.

994
00:37:20.434 --> 00:37:20.855
Ooh, love it.

995
00:37:20.875 --> 00:37:21.275
I love it.

996
00:37:31.030 --> 00:37:32.690
It sounds like a dinosaur, and I don't want to fuck it up.

997
00:37:35.651 --> 00:37:36.992
A dinosaur is crazy.

998
00:37:37.012 --> 00:37:40.573
So, first of all, let me go ahead and... We're going to Google this one, because what in the world...

999
00:37:40.593 --> 00:37:41.893
It looks like a dinosaur, and I can't...

1000
00:37:41.913 --> 00:37:42.693
I'm not going to Google.

1001
00:37:42.733 --> 00:37:43.653
I'm not fucking it up.

1002
00:37:44.734 --> 00:37:47.374
And then we're going to go to Polly... What the hell?

1003
00:37:47.434 --> 00:37:48.235
Okay, so let's see.

1004
00:37:48.455 --> 00:37:50.235
And we're going to ask Google to say it, y'all.

1005
00:37:50.255 --> 00:37:51.395
Don't judge us.

1006
00:37:51.476 --> 00:37:52.496
Don't you judge us.

1007
00:37:52.816 --> 00:37:53.556
We just trying to...

1008
00:37:53.576 --> 00:37:55.237
I told y'all, we learning as y'all learning.

1009
00:37:55.317 --> 00:37:56.357
No, seriously.

1010
00:37:56.377 --> 00:37:57.157
Shoot.

1011
00:37:57.397 --> 00:37:58.557
So, it doesn't even...

1012
00:37:58.697 --> 00:38:00.218
It doesn't even have anything...

1013
00:38:01.591 --> 00:38:07.264
We have the definition, but normally Google would give you a pronunciation.

1014
00:38:07.445 --> 00:38:08.988
Yes, it's giving us polyamorous.

1015
00:38:09.029 --> 00:38:10.612
But this one is polyurous.

1016
00:38:11.803 --> 00:38:13.465
It's likely a typo.

1017
00:38:13.625 --> 00:38:14.866
So maybe that's not it.

1018
00:38:14.966 --> 00:38:17.549
You mean, you probably mean polyamorous, which we know.

1019
00:38:18.189 --> 00:38:19.290
We know what that means.

1020
00:38:19.390 --> 00:38:24.555
Having more than one romantic or sexual partner with everyone knowing and agreeing.

1021
00:38:25.256 --> 00:38:29.220
Polyandria is having more than one husband or male mate.

1022
00:38:29.840 --> 00:38:33.324
And polygynous is having more than one wife or female mate.

1023
00:38:34.075 --> 00:38:40.598
However, the reason why I know Google is wrong about this, and maybe Google is just now seeing it for the first time, just like we are.

1024
00:38:40.698 --> 00:38:41.438
Yes, God.

1025
00:38:41.498 --> 00:38:46.420
Because the definition of this word, which is... Polyandrous.

1026
00:38:46.800 --> 00:38:47.900
Polyrosis.

1027
00:38:48.181 --> 00:38:48.881
Polyrosis.

1028
00:38:49.041 --> 00:38:49.801
Polyrosis.

1029
00:38:49.901 --> 00:38:51.362
Polyrosis.

1030
00:38:52.122 --> 00:38:52.982
Polyrosis.

1031
00:38:53.082 --> 00:38:54.943
Polyrosis.

1032
00:38:54.983 --> 00:38:56.724
The definition is... Can you spell the word, please?

1033
00:38:57.024 --> 00:38:57.484
Let's start there.

1034
00:38:57.504 --> 00:38:58.965
You know we got to do it like a spelling test, guys.

1035
00:38:58.985 --> 00:38:59.145
Yes.

1036
00:38:59.445 --> 00:39:01.666
So P-O-L-E-R-O-U-S.

1037
00:39:01.686 --> 00:39:01.926
Yes.

1038
00:39:04.093 --> 00:39:04.333
Yes.

1039
00:39:04.654 --> 00:39:05.594
And what is the meaning?

1040
00:39:06.255 --> 00:39:08.977
P-O-L-Y-E-R-O-S-O-U-S.

1041
00:39:09.157 --> 00:39:09.437
Yes.

1042
00:39:09.938 --> 00:39:10.158
Yes.

1043
00:39:10.759 --> 00:39:16.603
So the definition is a polyamorous bond organized primarily around sexual attraction.

1044
00:39:17.324 --> 00:39:20.507
Not every poly connection is romance first.

1045
00:39:20.927 --> 00:39:21.728
And that's valid.

1046
00:39:22.780 --> 00:39:23.261
Okay.

1047
00:39:23.441 --> 00:39:24.061
That's different.

1048
00:39:24.442 --> 00:39:25.223
That is different.

1049
00:39:25.783 --> 00:39:26.724
But wouldn't that be swinging?

1050
00:39:26.924 --> 00:39:27.585
Okay, so you know what?

1051
00:39:27.605 --> 00:39:28.746
These words are going to fuck me up, y'all.

1052
00:39:28.766 --> 00:39:38.196
Because just like that solo poly stuff, I am sitting... And I mean, somebody actually wrote me in my DMs talking about them being solo poly.

1053
00:39:38.236 --> 00:39:39.037
You're lying.

1054
00:39:39.157 --> 00:39:39.497
I swear.

1055
00:39:39.557 --> 00:39:41.719
We haven't even... And I was like...

1056
00:39:42.760 --> 00:39:44.121
How do you feel about this solo poly?

1057
00:39:44.141 --> 00:39:45.761
Because he was telling me about the dynamic that he wants.

1058
00:39:45.781 --> 00:39:47.542
He wants two women and, you know, all the things.

1059
00:39:47.862 --> 00:39:51.844
He also made mention that a lot of people that are in this lifestyle are not attractive.

1060
00:39:55.226 --> 00:39:56.026
I can't wait.

1061
00:39:56.698 --> 00:39:58.279
To see our community built.

1062
00:39:58.599 --> 00:40:08.062
Because I will say, and I'm not to deter from your story too far, but my significant other and I have, we've been to the munches.

1063
00:40:08.122 --> 00:40:10.563
We've been to the club.

1064
00:40:10.603 --> 00:40:11.683
You know, you remember the munch?

1065
00:40:11.723 --> 00:40:12.064
No.

1066
00:40:12.664 --> 00:40:15.765
Oh, a munch is like a, it's like a outing.

1067
00:40:15.785 --> 00:40:18.666
Like it might be like a happy hour or like a.

1068
00:40:19.066 --> 00:40:24.490
You know, you go, and we've been to a few of them in our area, but you go and you meet other people within lifestyle.

1069
00:40:24.970 --> 00:40:27.192
So they might be swingers.

1070
00:40:27.212 --> 00:40:28.012
They might be kink.

1071
00:40:28.093 --> 00:40:31.715
They might be poly.

1072
00:40:31.875 --> 00:40:36.538
It's just within, you know, the alternative lifestyle.

1073
00:40:36.558 --> 00:40:38.840
Okay.

1074
00:40:38.900 --> 00:40:48.527
But as many of the clubs we go to, as many of the events and stuff that we seek out and that we go to, we just don't meet very many attractive people.

1075
00:40:49.867 --> 00:40:50.348
Really?

1076
00:40:50.388 --> 00:40:51.710
It's so unfortunate.

1077
00:40:51.750 --> 00:40:55.255
And it's just like, I know that we are, I know we're out here.

1078
00:40:55.715 --> 00:40:55.976
Yes.

1079
00:40:56.576 --> 00:41:01.403
So I'm hoping that the people that, you know, watch our podcast and the people that

1080
00:41:02.057 --> 00:41:10.539
um, had, you know, subscribed to us and, um, I'm hoping that we can build our own community of people that we feel are more like us.

1081
00:41:10.839 --> 00:41:11.119
Yes.

1082
00:41:11.619 --> 00:41:11.899
So.

1083
00:41:12.300 --> 00:41:13.320
In an attractive way.

1084
00:41:13.420 --> 00:41:17.401
And not just physically attractive, but mentally attractive as well.

1085
00:41:17.421 --> 00:41:17.681
Yeah, yeah.

1086
00:41:17.701 --> 00:41:18.701
But sometimes I've met women.

1087
00:41:18.841 --> 00:41:19.321
Yes.

1088
00:41:19.501 --> 00:41:25.463
I've met women that were very attractive and, you know, like they have girl crushes and stuff and they're kind of like bi-curious and all the things.

1089
00:41:26.803 --> 00:41:33.248
But what I've learned and recognized is that they open their mouth and they're so much cuter with it.

1090
00:41:33.488 --> 00:41:34.369
So nasty.

1091
00:41:34.389 --> 00:41:35.650
They're so.

1092
00:41:35.930 --> 00:41:38.131
I'm like, you were that.

1093
00:41:38.472 --> 00:41:39.632
It's just like an air brain.

1094
00:41:39.833 --> 00:41:40.893
I'm just like, damn.

1095
00:41:40.953 --> 00:41:42.655
Like the same way you got a man on the street.

1096
00:41:43.015 --> 00:41:45.577
You got the bitch that is just talking out the side of her neck.

1097
00:41:45.637 --> 00:41:45.757
Yes.

1098
00:41:45.857 --> 00:41:48.679
Who's still doing childish things.

1099
00:41:48.719 --> 00:41:49.019
Yeah.

1100
00:41:49.039 --> 00:41:50.360
Turn off to me.

1101
00:41:50.520 --> 00:41:52.642
Yeah, with the drama.

1102
00:41:52.702 --> 00:41:54.043
Keep some drama around them.

1103
00:41:54.103 --> 00:41:55.104
I can't do drama.

1104
00:41:55.184 --> 00:41:56.446
Y'all that make me itch.

1105
00:41:56.506 --> 00:41:57.226
I'm telling you.

1106
00:41:57.406 --> 00:41:58.928
And I'm such a girl's girl.

1107
00:41:59.008 --> 00:41:59.789
I am too.

1108
00:41:59.869 --> 00:42:00.950
I'm such a girl's girl.

1109
00:42:01.130 --> 00:42:02.091
And I love my women.

1110
00:42:02.131 --> 00:42:03.012
I love my ladies.

1111
00:42:03.092 --> 00:42:03.993
I love my men too.

1112
00:42:04.013 --> 00:42:06.175
My black and brown men ain't nothing like y'all.

1113
00:42:06.275 --> 00:42:06.415
Okay?

1114
00:42:06.435 --> 00:42:07.876
Yes, absolutely.

1115
00:42:08.697 --> 00:42:10.579
But I definitely, definitely think that

1116
00:42:11.735 --> 00:42:14.922
We just have to, we're going to have to do better.

1117
00:42:15.103 --> 00:42:20.635
And hopefully this opens the door to that, the other things that we have up our sleeves that we're not going to share yet.

1118
00:42:21.072 --> 00:42:27.714
Hopefully that opens, you know, the door to that because we definitely got to get some attractive and like-minded individuals.

1119
00:42:27.774 --> 00:42:28.934
And I know that there are several.

1120
00:42:29.014 --> 00:42:34.716
I know that there's people that we're probably speaking to now that are nervous and they're scared and they're like, oh, yes.

1121
00:42:35.196 --> 00:42:37.997
What are people going to think of me if I decide that I want to have multiple partners?

1122
00:42:38.597 --> 00:42:40.778
I mean, baby, it's your life at the end of the day.

1123
00:42:40.798 --> 00:42:42.019
Please don't give a fuck about that.

1124
00:42:42.259 --> 00:42:42.579
Yeah.

1125
00:42:42.599 --> 00:42:43.979
Because who going to please you if you don't?

1126
00:42:44.279 --> 00:42:44.779
That part.

1127
00:42:45.160 --> 00:42:46.260
Please understand that.

1128
00:42:46.680 --> 00:42:48.300
And that's the space that I'm in.

1129
00:42:48.340 --> 00:42:48.741
And men too.

1130
00:42:49.121 --> 00:42:49.461
Yes.

1131
00:42:49.721 --> 00:42:50.581
Please understand that.

1132
00:42:50.601 --> 00:42:51.421
Yes, absolutely.

1133
00:42:51.441 --> 00:42:52.602
Because you will find someone.

1134
00:42:52.622 --> 00:42:53.302
It may take a while.

1135
00:42:53.322 --> 00:43:01.184
You're going to find somebody that is going to adore you and going to want to be with you, you know, regardless of what that other young woman is doing for you.

1136
00:43:01.264 --> 00:43:10.326
And she's probably going to appreciate the fact because I think that a lot of men, they feel, I mean, a lot of women feel like men want to women because it's just, it's selfish.

1137
00:43:10.826 --> 00:43:14.108
But truthfully, I think about... Or it's a sexual thing.

1138
00:43:14.149 --> 00:43:15.309
It's always sexualized stuff.

1139
00:43:15.329 --> 00:43:16.750
It's a fantasy.

1140
00:43:16.770 --> 00:43:17.651
Sexualizing stuff.

1141
00:43:17.691 --> 00:43:19.632
Because that woman is a partner too.

1142
00:43:20.193 --> 00:43:23.535
Like, I would love to have, you know, another woman that is...

1143
00:43:23.555 --> 00:43:24.075
I mean, I do.

1144
00:43:24.135 --> 00:43:24.696
You know, I have you.

1145
00:43:25.156 --> 00:43:26.757
But you get my drift.

1146
00:43:26.777 --> 00:43:28.699
Like, you have someone that's there for you.

1147
00:43:28.739 --> 00:43:32.041
That's a sister relationship that calls you out of your bullshit.

1148
00:43:32.061 --> 00:43:33.362
Because I can't stand a yes for it.

1149
00:43:33.522 --> 00:43:34.202
Yeah, me neither.

1150
00:43:34.222 --> 00:43:35.523
Like, tell me that I'm wrong.

1151
00:43:35.903 --> 00:43:36.723
La, la, tighten up.

1152
00:43:36.863 --> 00:43:37.684
Yeah, that's not cute.

1153
00:43:37.704 --> 00:43:38.704
Like, you know what I mean?

1154
00:43:38.844 --> 00:43:39.644
It's not whatsoever.

1155
00:43:39.684 --> 00:43:41.005
And you know you can't do that, right?

1156
00:43:41.025 --> 00:43:41.285
Yes.

1157
00:43:41.305 --> 00:43:43.286
And I think it's more beneficial to the woman.

1158
00:43:43.446 --> 00:43:43.766
Yes.

1159
00:43:43.926 --> 00:43:44.206
To be iron.

1160
00:43:44.246 --> 00:43:44.486
Absolutely.

1161
00:43:44.606 --> 00:43:45.686
Iron shopping's iron.

1162
00:43:46.006 --> 00:43:46.307
Yes.

1163
00:43:46.667 --> 00:43:56.410
And, hell, we all get busy, and life is days where you just don't feel like doing certain shit, or you just don't have the mental... You're just able to come in there and, like, pick up this black for you.

1164
00:43:56.430 --> 00:44:01.032
Yeah, the mental capacity to just do certain things, and I think...

1165
00:44:02.030 --> 00:44:08.554
Having someone in your life that loves you enough to say, okay, the days I don't have it, you got it.

1166
00:44:08.674 --> 00:44:08.934
Yes.

1167
00:44:09.114 --> 00:44:13.456
The days I don't have it, you know, or the days, you know, mix and match, vice versa.

1168
00:44:13.676 --> 00:44:14.517
I love that.

1169
00:44:14.917 --> 00:44:23.402
I think that women could benefit more if they opened their mind up outside of their insecurity and outside of that, the fear they have.

1170
00:44:23.562 --> 00:44:25.283
And that comes out as ownership.

1171
00:44:25.783 --> 00:44:26.704
Because it's really fear.

1172
00:44:27.225 --> 00:44:27.505
It is.

1173
00:44:28.046 --> 00:44:28.246
Yeah.

1174
00:44:28.266 --> 00:44:28.606
It is.

1175
00:44:28.967 --> 00:44:29.287
It is.

1176
00:44:29.327 --> 00:44:33.952
And I think that that is the entire no, I'm not trying to shun down, monogamy.

1177
00:44:33.972 --> 00:44:36.175
Because I promise you, I've been monogamous.

1178
00:44:36.195 --> 00:44:37.296
I have been monogamous.

1179
00:44:37.496 --> 00:44:38.037
Absolutely.

1180
00:44:38.137 --> 00:44:38.677
Absolutely.

1181
00:44:38.778 --> 00:44:40.159
For the majority of my life.

1182
00:44:40.560 --> 00:44:41.020
That part.

1183
00:44:41.080 --> 00:44:42.101
It's not that I can't do it.

1184
00:44:42.141 --> 00:44:43.403
I have and I've done it well.

1185
00:44:43.543 --> 00:44:44.464
But, um...

1186
00:44:45.893 --> 00:44:49.594
That's not to say that I'm not open to other dynamics.

1187
00:44:50.034 --> 00:44:51.614
Because other dynamics can be just as great.

1188
00:44:51.974 --> 00:44:52.494
Absolutely.

1189
00:44:52.894 --> 00:44:53.154
Yeah.

1190
00:44:53.294 --> 00:44:54.815
As long as you have that, what's that word?

1191
00:44:55.455 --> 00:44:57.115
Communication.

1192
00:44:57.435 --> 00:44:57.895
I love it.

1193
00:44:57.975 --> 00:44:58.315
I love it.

1194
00:44:58.335 --> 00:44:59.976
You see how she was able to finish that for me?

1195
00:45:00.876 --> 00:45:01.436
I love that.

1196
00:45:01.496 --> 00:45:03.717
I love when you can, I can think something and you can just say it.

1197
00:45:03.857 --> 00:45:05.257
Like, I mean, you said it.

1198
00:45:05.337 --> 00:45:06.097
I was thinking it.

1199
00:45:06.137 --> 00:45:07.857
You know, it's like a white chick's moment.

1200
00:45:07.937 --> 00:45:08.317
Yeah.

1201
00:45:08.337 --> 00:45:09.438
Yeah, for sure.

1202
00:45:09.458 --> 00:45:10.898
I love that.

1203
00:45:11.870 --> 00:45:17.253
Okay, so I'm trying to think if we, okay, so we did this crazy word of the day.

1204
00:45:17.693 --> 00:45:21.555
Oh, what is, we have our, okay, so we have our open letter.

1205
00:45:21.575 --> 00:45:25.497
I'm writing you an open letter.

1206
00:45:28.098 --> 00:45:29.699
Open letter.

1207
00:45:30.479 --> 00:45:32.360
Did you want to discuss the open letter?

1208
00:45:32.380 --> 00:45:35.282
Because that sounds like a real thing over there.

1209
00:45:36.911 --> 00:45:37.031
Okay.

1210
00:45:37.051 --> 00:45:38.353
Okay, and we can discuss it together.

1211
00:45:38.553 --> 00:45:39.414
Okay, go for it.

1212
00:45:39.494 --> 00:45:39.874
Okay.

1213
00:45:40.415 --> 00:45:48.924
So as you guys know, Open Letter is where we have someone from our community reach out to us and ask for advice on what they may be experiencing.

1214
00:45:49.104 --> 00:45:50.665
And, of course, it's always anonymous.

1215
00:45:50.745 --> 00:45:53.729
So if there's anything that you want to talk about, hit us up.

1216
00:45:54.329 --> 00:45:55.330
Absolutely.

1217
00:45:55.390 --> 00:45:56.912
But today's Open Letter reads...

1218
00:45:58.193 --> 00:46:03.817
My nested partner wants to stop using condoms with me now that we're fluid bonded.

1219
00:46:04.638 --> 00:46:08.201
But he started seeing someone new who won't get tested.

1220
00:46:08.741 --> 00:46:10.523
Am I the crazy one for saying no?

1221
00:46:13.385 --> 00:46:16.207
I'm going to just go ahead and swallow this one down because I think I need more.

1222
00:46:16.587 --> 00:46:24.393
First of all, let me just start by saying fluid bonding is something that is, you know, it's a network decision.

1223
00:46:25.154 --> 00:46:26.415
It's not just the two of you.

1224
00:46:27.715 --> 00:46:31.538
So because the two of you aren't the only fucking fluists that's being.

1225
00:46:32.078 --> 00:46:32.519
Exchanged.

1226
00:46:32.559 --> 00:46:34.020
Exchanged.

1227
00:46:34.060 --> 00:46:37.702
So that should be something discussed among the entire network or community.

1228
00:46:37.923 --> 00:46:38.663
Call it what you want.

1229
00:46:38.723 --> 00:46:39.244
Network.

1230
00:46:39.404 --> 00:46:40.044
Right.

1231
00:46:40.304 --> 00:46:40.765
Tribe.

1232
00:46:41.065 --> 00:46:41.805
Your partners.

1233
00:46:41.845 --> 00:46:42.106
Yeah.

1234
00:46:42.166 --> 00:46:42.866
Your partners.

1235
00:46:42.926 --> 00:46:43.206
Yes.

1236
00:46:43.687 --> 00:46:44.127
Absolutely.

1237
00:46:44.207 --> 00:46:45.108
I wholeheartedly agree.

1238
00:46:45.788 --> 00:46:46.649
I think it's selfish.

1239
00:46:47.189 --> 00:46:47.630
Extremely.

1240
00:46:48.971 --> 00:46:49.951
I think it's irresponsible.

1241
00:46:49.971 --> 00:46:50.672
Yeah.

1242
00:46:51.300 --> 00:47:01.446
I think if she has allowed herself to fluid bond or go raw with you, it's because she trusts you.

1243
00:47:02.266 --> 00:47:03.927
And now because you're interested.

1244
00:47:03.947 --> 00:47:04.788
To give you her body.

1245
00:47:04.848 --> 00:47:06.429
She literally is giving you her body.

1246
00:47:06.529 --> 00:47:14.213
And because you want some new ass with someone who doesn't even take care of their body enough or love their body enough to get tested.

1247
00:47:14.794 --> 00:47:16.415
And now you want her to be okay with that?

1248
00:47:16.435 --> 00:47:16.815
Yeah.

1249
00:47:17.115 --> 00:47:17.555
Not okay.

1250
00:47:17.695 --> 00:47:18.495
I think it's selfish.

1251
00:47:18.535 --> 00:47:19.416
I think it's irresponsible.

1252
00:47:19.456 --> 00:47:20.896
And I think it's actually kind of disgusting.

1253
00:47:21.216 --> 00:47:21.496
It is.

1254
00:47:21.756 --> 00:47:23.216
It's quite disgusting to say the least.

1255
00:47:23.717 --> 00:47:24.837
It's quite disgusting.

1256
00:47:26.417 --> 00:47:36.439
And unfortunately, the fact that you are worried about something like that, it says a lot about you and how you care about this person.

1257
00:47:36.699 --> 00:47:37.620
How you care about yourself.

1258
00:47:37.640 --> 00:47:40.780
But I need, listen, you see how she can took the words out again?

1259
00:47:40.820 --> 00:47:43.261
Because I need you to care about yourself like that.

1260
00:47:43.501 --> 00:47:43.921
Yeah.

1261
00:47:44.041 --> 00:47:44.801
And I feel like you do.

1262
00:47:44.861 --> 00:47:47.102
And that's why it's not sitting right with you.

1263
00:47:47.142 --> 00:47:48.443
Yeah, your soul is not.

1264
00:47:48.523 --> 00:47:50.283
So I need you to have that conversation.

1265
00:47:50.303 --> 00:47:51.704
I need you to have that conversation tonight.

1266
00:47:51.884 --> 00:47:52.044
Okay?

1267
00:47:52.064 --> 00:47:54.065
I don't care if it's dinner time, bath time.

1268
00:47:54.465 --> 00:47:56.146
I don't care who's feeling away.

1269
00:47:56.166 --> 00:48:02.068
I don't care if everything is aroused and that dick is standing up straight to the ceiling.

1270
00:48:02.428 --> 00:48:04.729
I can't do anything for you until we have this conversation.

1271
00:48:05.187 --> 00:48:06.188
You had a conversation.

1272
00:48:06.208 --> 00:48:09.790
We spoke about something the other day that just has not been sitting right in my stomach.

1273
00:48:10.430 --> 00:48:14.833
Let's have this conversation on why I feel the way that I do.

1274
00:48:15.874 --> 00:48:18.616
And please enlighten me on why you feel the way that you do.

1275
00:48:18.816 --> 00:48:20.517
So that way we can have a conversation about it.

1276
00:48:20.537 --> 00:48:21.778
Yeah, let's have a conversation.

1277
00:48:21.978 --> 00:48:23.899
It's absolutely a conversation because maybe...

1278
00:48:24.359 --> 00:48:47.043
some people are just oblivious they feel like oh well you know you said we're poly so i mean why what's the big deal you know i'm saying and some people really are ph because our ph can get thrown off no matter what okay let's start there so when you start talking about multiple partners and all the things right you have to be very very careful because everybody always think that it's just stds stis and olives and babies that are involved but it's like

1279
00:48:47.643 --> 00:48:50.165
It's energy exchange, A, right?

1280
00:48:50.365 --> 00:48:55.770
So now I'm over here trying to figure out why I'm depressed because I allowed this nigga to stick his dick in me in my portal.

1281
00:48:56.310 --> 00:48:59.273
And now I'm over here trying to figure out, like, why I'm depressed.

1282
00:48:59.293 --> 00:49:00.213
I wasn't depressed, though.

1283
00:49:00.233 --> 00:49:03.696
You disrupted the whole... My whole nervous system is, like, tampered with.

1284
00:49:03.716 --> 00:49:04.517
It's chaos in the kingdom.

1285
00:49:04.697 --> 00:49:05.558
Yes.

1286
00:49:05.718 --> 00:49:11.341
And now I didn't transfer it to my other partner and he's over here trying to figure out, he's over here breaking shit and he's the calmest and groundedest person.

1287
00:49:11.821 --> 00:49:18.485
You know, so that, but it's also, you know, BV and yeast and, you know, all the things.

1288
00:49:18.785 --> 00:49:21.547
And none of those things are fun to deal with.

1289
00:49:21.587 --> 00:49:22.287
It's an experience.

1290
00:49:22.587 --> 00:49:23.007
Right.

1291
00:49:23.067 --> 00:49:28.770
And majority men, you know, unfortunately, I say this and not a jokingly way, but you guys can air dry.

1292
00:49:29.230 --> 00:49:29.530
Right.

1293
00:49:29.610 --> 00:49:37.914
Meanwhile, we are sitting stuck with the discharges and the funny smells and, you know, everything that's just thrown off or what have you.

1294
00:49:37.954 --> 00:49:39.935
And then if you're saying that we have another partner.

1295
00:49:40.515 --> 00:49:42.877
We got to share that too because sometimes our chemistry don't mix.

1296
00:49:42.897 --> 00:49:43.058
Exactly.

1297
00:49:43.078 --> 00:49:44.499
Like sometimes it's really like...

1298
00:49:44.519 --> 00:49:45.740
The bodies just don't work well.

1299
00:49:45.760 --> 00:49:47.181
The bodies just don't work well together.

1300
00:49:47.221 --> 00:49:48.603
But it's definitely a thing.

1301
00:49:48.883 --> 00:49:52.647
I know it's a thing because I had a friend that was dealing with someone else and I was just like...

1302
00:49:53.618 --> 00:49:55.119
Are you guys hunching unprotected?

1303
00:49:55.139 --> 00:49:59.583
Because if so, I think that we all need to just make sure that we just all, we just, from here on out, we just all gonna wear condoms.

1304
00:49:59.743 --> 00:50:00.444
Yeah.

1305
00:50:00.544 --> 00:50:04.146
Like, because I'd rather my shit itching from a rubber than to be itching from something else.

1306
00:50:04.166 --> 00:50:05.207
From something else, yeah.

1307
00:50:05.267 --> 00:50:09.871
And unfortunately, like, our bodies just did not exist with each other.

1308
00:50:09.891 --> 00:50:12.333
Like, our chemistry just was all- Didn't coexist well, yeah.

1309
00:50:12.633 --> 00:50:15.074
And me and this young lady did not deal with each other together.

1310
00:50:15.115 --> 00:50:15.575
You know what I mean?

1311
00:50:15.595 --> 00:50:18.456
But I knew that this person was dealing with, you know, this gentleman.

1312
00:50:18.817 --> 00:50:24.179
And I was like, yep, this is not going to work for me because I don't have time to be coming in here trying to figure out what's going on.

1313
00:50:24.219 --> 00:50:24.680
Yeah.

1314
00:50:26.301 --> 00:50:29.262
But I think that that's a real conversation that you should definitely, definitely have.

1315
00:50:29.282 --> 00:50:30.403
And I'm glad that you wrote in.

1316
00:50:30.423 --> 00:50:34.145
And if you have any other questions or we could be any assistance and let us know how that went to.

1317
00:50:34.685 --> 00:50:43.907
like, please let us know, you know, because we are curious to know, like after the advice we give you, if you take it or if you just swallow it and be like, oh, you know, I'm just going to deal with it or whatever.

1318
00:50:43.927 --> 00:50:48.228
But I think this right here is something that is playing with your life in a sense.

1319
00:50:48.428 --> 00:50:48.968
Absolutely.

1320
00:50:49.048 --> 00:50:50.548
So I think that it's a conversation.

1321
00:50:50.568 --> 00:50:51.668
We were just talking about prep.

1322
00:50:52.008 --> 00:50:54.689
Like, yeah, you can't be out here playing with your life.

1323
00:50:54.709 --> 00:50:56.109
I wholeheartedly agree.

1324
00:50:56.129 --> 00:50:56.449
Yeah.

1325
00:50:56.769 --> 00:50:57.589
You have to.

1326
00:50:57.609 --> 00:50:58.909
So I...

1327
00:51:03.537 --> 00:51:18.157
I just think, I guess, in closing, right, whether you're monogamous, ethically, non-monogamous, or you're still figuring out what it is that love looks like for you, one thing that never changes is healthy relationships are built to be honest.

1328
00:51:19.348 --> 00:51:22.871
Or they are built on honest conversations, rather.

1329
00:51:22.891 --> 00:51:33.238
So I think that it's super important to communicate, have these conversations when you initially meet, right?

1330
00:51:33.318 --> 00:51:36.660
Some conversations, just about, like, what your wants are and if you know...

1331
00:51:36.960 --> 00:51:42.564
And just have the morals and the ethics to have a conversation with a person, in my opinion, when you first meet them.

1332
00:51:42.584 --> 00:51:48.367
Yeah, you should absolutely be sharing what it is that you're into, what it is, how you live your life.

1333
00:51:48.647 --> 00:51:48.867
Yeah.

1334
00:51:48.887 --> 00:51:49.648
You know what I'm saying?

1335
00:51:49.768 --> 00:51:55.331
And, I mean, it doesn't have to be in, depending on what you're discussing.

1336
00:51:55.431 --> 00:51:59.494
I mean, you don't have to come out the gate and say, you know, this is, you know, this.

1337
00:52:00.028 --> 00:52:02.709
the breakdown of how I, you know, I be fucking.

1338
00:52:03.229 --> 00:52:06.229
But do you have multiple partners?

1339
00:52:06.289 --> 00:52:06.590
Yeah.

1340
00:52:06.610 --> 00:52:07.670
There's who I be fucking.

1341
00:52:07.730 --> 00:52:08.170
Yeah.

1342
00:52:08.210 --> 00:52:08.470
Right.

1343
00:52:08.530 --> 00:52:09.370
You know what I mean?

1344
00:52:09.390 --> 00:52:11.451
Like, and don't take no option from a person.

1345
00:52:11.471 --> 00:52:11.611
Right.

1346
00:52:11.731 --> 00:52:12.731
I can't stand that.

1347
00:52:12.771 --> 00:52:13.071
Yeah.

1348
00:52:13.131 --> 00:52:19.553
Don't be unethical in how you maneuver and how you handle people.

1349
00:52:19.773 --> 00:52:20.133
Yeah.

1350
00:52:20.593 --> 00:52:20.913
You know?

1351
00:52:21.553 --> 00:52:23.013
I think that's very important.

1352
00:52:23.073 --> 00:52:23.453
Yeah.

1353
00:52:23.493 --> 00:52:24.634
Be careful how you handle me.

1354
00:52:24.794 --> 00:52:25.034
Okay?

1355
00:52:25.054 --> 00:52:25.614
Yes.

1356
00:52:25.714 --> 00:52:28.315
And be careful how you handle my heartthrobs.

1357
00:52:28.575 --> 00:52:28.955
Yes.

1358
00:52:28.995 --> 00:52:29.655
Heartthrobs.

1359
00:52:30.515 --> 00:52:57.158
um stay safe take care of yourself and have those hard conversations guys it could save your life i agree and i guess until next time we love you heartthrobs make sure you like follow share subscribe all the things um and if you have any secrets that you want to let us know please feel free comment open yes

1360
00:53:01.255 --> 00:53:07.180
Multiple loves, one conversation is triple heart.