WEBVTT

1
00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.720
Why are you trying to change people's perception of you when you can just change who you are and

2
00:00:04.720 --> 00:00:09.840
let their perceptions catch up? Welcome to the game where we talk about how to get more customers,

3
00:00:09.840 --> 00:00:13.680
how to make more customers, how to keep them longer, and the many failures and lessons we have learned

4
00:00:13.680 --> 00:00:19.360
along the way. I hope you enjoy and subscribe. Let's be able to break down one of the stories that

5
00:00:19.360 --> 00:00:24.800
impacted my life the most and hopefully how you can learn from it. So I wasn't that great

6
00:00:24.800 --> 00:00:29.920
of a person when I graduated high school. I think I was really self-centered. There's always

7
00:00:29.920 --> 00:00:36.640
about me and what everyone could do for me and everything I wanted was just like respect and status

8
00:00:36.640 --> 00:00:40.640
and maybe that hasn't changed and I've just gotten better at it. I don't know or my understanding

9
00:00:40.640 --> 00:00:46.560
of people's improved but I think that some of the things that I did were really bad and I want

10
00:00:46.560 --> 00:00:49.760
to share with you a conversation that changed my life. And so if you don't know I am my name's

11
00:00:49.920 --> 00:00:53.120
Al Shamosi. I'm an acquisition.com. It's a portfolio of companies that have 85 million dollars a year.

12
00:00:53.120 --> 00:00:59.760
So this particular story was after my first semester of college freshman year. And so I went to

13
00:00:59.760 --> 00:01:04.480
an all-night school in high school and I went to Vanderbilt from my undergrad and I thought and I

14
00:01:04.480 --> 00:01:11.120
had acquired a pretty bad reputation in my opinion in high school by being kind of promiscuous

15
00:01:11.120 --> 00:01:15.840
for lack of a better term. I was known as a womanizer and I just didn't generally have a very good

16
00:01:15.840 --> 00:01:19.600
reputation or at least one that I wasn't proud of. And so when I went to college I was like okay it's

17
00:01:19.600 --> 00:01:24.960
my chance to start fresh and it's a much bigger school so you know my transcriptions won't be

18
00:01:24.960 --> 00:01:30.560
as known because it's way more people. And I went ahead and the first you know three months of my

19
00:01:30.560 --> 00:01:35.840
college career I did everything that I was doing in high school on steroids. I did more of everything.

20
00:01:35.840 --> 00:01:43.440
I drank more. I went out more. I just did more of everything. And I ended up having a one

21
00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:50.000
think of one nine GPA going inside. I basically had these report cards from

22
00:01:50.640 --> 00:01:53.920
my teachers that were like halfway through first semester that were sent home that were like

23
00:01:54.960 --> 00:01:59.760
your son is failing basically every class. And so my dad called me up and was like if you're

24
00:01:59.760 --> 00:02:05.280
going to do this like like you can do this it's here for free and not and not do this at college

25
00:02:05.280 --> 00:02:13.040
right. And so anyways I went home and I was like dead like what do I do to fix my reputation like

26
00:02:13.120 --> 00:02:17.280
how do I get these people to stop talking all this Mac like there's this there's the

27
00:02:17.280 --> 00:02:20.560
thing back in the day called juicy campus which is like a gossip form and then I'm getting shut down

28
00:02:20.560 --> 00:02:24.400
because there's so much hate on it. But there was like this massive massive threat about me and

29
00:02:24.400 --> 00:02:29.120
how I was just like a total womanizer and all this stuff. And I felt horrible you know I mean you

30
00:02:29.120 --> 00:02:32.880
can imagine like the younger version of yourself that's really sensitive to like what everyone says

31
00:02:32.880 --> 00:02:37.920
about you. And so I just went to my bed and I was like how do I change what they're saying? I was

32
00:02:37.920 --> 00:02:42.640
like how do I get them to say good things. And it sounds retarded to say this now because like

33
00:02:42.640 --> 00:02:46.080
and that's why I'm sharing this with you because this might be better for younger audience I don't know

34
00:02:46.720 --> 00:02:50.800
but what he said to me changed my life. And he looked at me in the eyes and he was like

35
00:02:51.600 --> 00:02:56.080
why are you trying to change people's perception of you when you can just change who you are

36
00:02:56.080 --> 00:02:59.760
and let their perceptions catch up. He said the only way you're going to change your reputation is

37
00:02:59.760 --> 00:03:04.320
by being different. He's like you need to stop being this person that does all these things

38
00:03:04.320 --> 00:03:10.400
and your reputation will catch up. And even if it doesn't you'll always know. And honestly it kind

39
00:03:10.400 --> 00:03:14.640
of like it barely scratched the surface because my ego was so high and I was like no I just have

40
00:03:14.640 --> 00:03:19.280
to think of a better way to like mark it myself. But I ended up knowing that he was very serious about

41
00:03:19.280 --> 00:03:22.400
the threat of pulling me out of school if I didn't get my grades up. And so what I ended up doing

42
00:03:22.400 --> 00:03:28.080
for the next half of the semester of my first semester freshman year is I didn't go out at all.

43
00:03:28.080 --> 00:03:32.480
I didn't drink anymore. I really didn't like hang out with girls at all and all I did was study.

44
00:03:32.480 --> 00:03:38.880
And I was able to pull my like one might have been one too. It was very low. I think it wasn't one

45
00:03:38.880 --> 00:03:45.520
to actually up to a 3.2 for the semester which basically meant I got an A on everything from

46
00:03:45.520 --> 00:03:49.680
that point for the rest of the semester and I had to weigh down the zeros and fails that I had

47
00:03:49.680 --> 00:03:53.760
earlier. And so when I went back home he was like well now you know you can do it. And so we

48
00:03:53.760 --> 00:03:56.720
should always expect that that is what you're going to get from here on out. And I was like and

49
00:03:56.720 --> 00:04:01.280
what he meant was the straight A is not the three toe. And it also kind of proved it to myself too.

50
00:04:01.280 --> 00:04:05.200
I was like I guess I can do this. And you know what happened is after I started switching that

51
00:04:05.760 --> 00:04:09.920
people still thought of me as a whore. And I still had to deal with that. And I felt really bad

52
00:04:09.920 --> 00:04:15.040
about it. But I continued to go down this path of like I didn't talk to any girls. And you know

53
00:04:15.040 --> 00:04:19.840
after another basically semester I ended up meeting a girl that I liked and I ended up dating

54
00:04:19.840 --> 00:04:26.400
that person. And so it took like two years to really reverse the reputation that I had acquired

55
00:04:26.960 --> 00:04:32.160
in the first three months. And I think during that period of time I grew an appreciation for how

56
00:04:32.160 --> 00:04:37.120
easy it is, especially in first impressions to set them wrong one. And how hard it is to

57
00:04:37.120 --> 00:04:44.720
overcome a negative impression. And my reputation overall the realization I had was there's too

58
00:04:44.720 --> 00:04:49.280
many eyeballs. There's too many people that you're interacting with in the world to try and

59
00:04:49.280 --> 00:04:52.000
curate your reputation.

60
00:04:54.400 --> 00:04:59.120
Hey guys love that you're listening to the podcast. If you ever want to have the video version

61
00:04:59.200 --> 00:05:03.600
of this, which usually has more facts, more visuals, more graphs, you know drawn out stuff,

62
00:05:03.600 --> 00:05:07.760
sometimes it can help hit the brain centers in different ways. You can check on my YouTube channel.

63
00:05:07.760 --> 00:05:12.160
It's absolutely free to check that out if that's what you are into. And if not, keep enjoying the show.

64
00:05:14.880 --> 00:05:21.840
The only way to change your reputation is to change who you are. And reputation is fundamentally

65
00:05:21.840 --> 00:05:26.560
just what people say about you to your face and behind your back. Now I'm not saying that you

66
00:05:26.560 --> 00:05:30.640
need to care about everyone else's things. That's not really the point of this. It's much more,

67
00:05:31.440 --> 00:05:35.200
if one person says you're an asshole, whatever, if every person you know says you're an asshole,

68
00:05:35.200 --> 00:05:39.280
like you might be an asshole. And so if you have one of those situations where you feel like the

69
00:05:39.280 --> 00:05:43.120
proof or the evidence is overwhelming and you might even believe it, then it's probably you.

70
00:05:43.840 --> 00:05:49.680
And I think that for me getting out of the hole like I can control this and trying to curate

71
00:05:49.680 --> 00:05:53.760
what people think about me and transitioning to be like at the end of the day I'm the only

72
00:05:53.760 --> 00:05:58.560
person who knows who I am. And I don't like who I am. And just saying like, well, how can I get

73
00:05:58.560 --> 00:06:02.880
to a point where I would like me? And that would be good enough, even if everyone else hated me.

74
00:06:02.880 --> 00:06:09.440
How can I like me? And when I started operating from that place, it really changed my life. Because

75
00:06:09.440 --> 00:06:14.480
then I started thinking like, well, what version of me do I want to be? And what does that guy do?

76
00:06:14.480 --> 00:06:18.480
Well, that guy studies really hard. And that guy works out really hard. And that guy is a really good

77
00:06:18.480 --> 00:06:24.720
friend, you know, he's very loyal. He's always respectful. Doesn't have an ego. And it took me

78
00:06:24.720 --> 00:06:28.000
a long time and I still work on this stuff. You know what I'm saying? I'm done by any any search

79
00:06:28.000 --> 00:06:34.400
of imagination. I still haven't carried plenty of them. But I think that if you can simply shift

80
00:06:34.400 --> 00:06:40.800
the perspective of like, I'm going to try and appear this way on social media when I'm on camera

81
00:06:40.800 --> 00:06:48.160
to like, I want to be this way. And if it just so happens to get captured great and if it doesn't

82
00:06:48.720 --> 00:06:53.680
great. And there's this, this quote by ethnic titans that I'm probably going to butcher. But he says,

83
00:06:53.680 --> 00:07:00.400
if you need someone else to tell you something about yourself, you are out of integrity because

84
00:07:00.400 --> 00:07:07.040
you can always be your own witness. And I think that that's a great point to wrap this little video

85
00:07:07.040 --> 00:07:14.240
lesson up with because that piece strikes to the core of everything, which is we are our own

86
00:07:14.240 --> 00:07:18.240
witnesses. And if we want to change our reputation, we need to change our reputation with ourselves

87
00:07:18.240 --> 00:07:23.280
first. And then eventually it will reflect in the world. And this has just been very telling for

88
00:07:23.280 --> 00:07:27.200
me because like more and more people recognize me every day when I'm walking around. And I'm like,

89
00:07:27.200 --> 00:07:31.840
jeez, like I don't have any room for having a bad day. Like if I'm out to dinner and like I'm just

90
00:07:31.840 --> 00:07:35.840
like not concentrating and I'm short with a waiter and the waiter recognizes me, then you know,

91
00:07:35.840 --> 00:07:40.000
he's like this guy's an asshole or whatever. And so it's just I guess in some ways it's like you

92
00:07:40.000 --> 00:07:45.120
can pretend like you're famous because you are to yourself. You're the most famous person

93
00:07:45.120 --> 00:07:48.480
that you have to yourself. And so I will leave you with that, Rosie Nation. If you're new to the

94
00:07:48.480 --> 00:07:54.960
channel, welcome lots of love. Bye.