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that everyone wishes for the American dream and roots for you for the American

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dream until it comes true. Welcome to the game where we talk about how to get

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more customers, how to make more for customers, how to keep them longer and the

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many failures and lessons we have learned along the way. I hope you enjoy and

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subscribe. What's going on everyone? Happy Saturday today. I wanted to make this

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podcast for you because I got off the phone with attorney and he and I had a

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long conversation about a wide breadth of topics and he's like, dude, you should

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talk more about this kind of stuff. And so what I want to do is actually share

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with you kind of my experience of having the chip on my shoulder and kind of

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where it got me and what I learned in the process. And so if you have any kind of

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like thoughts around like trying to beat someone and like like you're gonna

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take these guys down and like all this stuff and I know many many people in this

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space, you know, fill that way towards me. I can tell you having literally gone

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through the entire process, it's really interesting. So like when I when I had my

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gyms, I wrote this huge essay and it was for myself because I actually have a

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creative writing background that most people don't know about. But I

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entitled it that everyone wishes for the American dream and roots for you for

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the American dream until it comes true. And I felt that way with my clients, you

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know, they were rooting for me when I was sleeping on the floor. They're like good

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for you, like pursuing your dreams. And but as time went on, you know, and I

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started to be able to hire people and we started making more money. And eventually

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I didn't have to work in the business. They're like, oh, you're too good for us

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now. Like a big businessman, right? And everyone roots for you until you do

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better than them. And so what ends up happening is that you have to set

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higher and higher goals for yourself to drive yourself, right? And for me, I

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definitely was an angrier person, or maybe I'm just better at hiding it now. I

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have no idea. But I was definitely angry or about stuff. And I set the

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school that I was going to beat Badros. If you guys recall who Badros

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Colleen and he said, big guru or was big guru in the in the gym space, he

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gets fit body. And and I started telling myself all of these things, you know,

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what I mean, like how he's wronging people and he's ripping people off. And I

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would tell myself these stories, you know what I mean, to try and like get

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myself amped up about like how I'm just going to like write the industry and

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and do everything. And I'm going to be bigger than him and like all this stuff,

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right? And the reality is, you know, as as time went on and you know, Jim

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won't screw and we grew and grew and grew and you know, I'm not I don't know

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what his numbers are, but I'm fairly certain that our coaching program is and

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has been bigger than his in this space at least for a while. And when I got

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there, you know, I guess to the heart, you know, to match that and surpass. First

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off, I found that it was incredibly empty. But secondly, I felt and realized

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that he was completely unaffected. He had he was still incredibly wealthy. He had

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other entrepreneurial endeavors he was pursuing. And this my success in no way

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affected his life. And it was one of the most humbling and also freeing moments of

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my life when I realized that because it he wasn't an enemy. And I doubt I was

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even, you know, like a blip on the radar during that time. And I mean, obviously

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they know who we are now. But it it didn't affect his life. And all this

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malicious, you know, list of this vengeance, this vendetta that I had like the

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only person it poisoned was me. And you know, there's two sides to this coin on

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one side, you have like the drive. You know, if you guys have seen the Jordan

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documentary talks about how you used to make things up that other people would

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say about them that they never actually said. And I feel like it's kind of like

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that. And it's and that chip on your shoulder does drive you. So I can't say it

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didn't drive me. But I don't think it made me a happier person.

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Most nation real quick, if you are a business owner that has a big old business

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and wants to get to a much bigger business going to $50, $100,000 plus we would

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love to talk to you. And if you like that, like to hear more about it, go to

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acquisition.com and you can plan anywhere on the page and talk to one of our

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team and see if we can help you get there.

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And so and believe me, I'm not the guy who's like go go hug trees and be happy.

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Like I'm all about the chief in achieving stuff. So like Bell means go do whatever

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works for you. But I can tell you that it seeing it truly seeing my success,

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not in any way impact someone else's success really radically transformed my

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feelings about competitors, about the space, about the industry, about other

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coaches in general, about what I was willing to do to help other coaches, et cetera.

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It really transformed me. I started calling up other people who were in our

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space and just saying like, Hey, how can I help you grow? And they're like seriously.

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And I was like, yeah, man, like, I mean, you're not going to take my stuff.

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And I'm not going to take your stuff because people are attracted to different

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people for different reasons. You know, people like everyone has different

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psychographics that they attract. Like I'm 81% male. Like women in general don't

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find my my content appealing. I'm just like, those are the data, right?

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Those are the stats. But the thing is is that by by freeing myself of this,

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I realize it didn't impact my success at all. And other people growing with,

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you know, with me helping or without me helping didn't affect my success either.

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But it did massively affect my mental wellbeing.

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And so I guess there's two sides to this message that you can take.

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One is if you were the, you know, the line climbing of the mountain,

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by all means, stay hungry as hell. Do whatever it takes for you to stay motivated.

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But I would say don't, don't do anything stupid. You know, don't, don't,

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don't say anything. Don't, don't take massive, you know, malicious attacks.

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I didn't do that. But I'm just saying, like, don't do that because you will end up

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burning bridges. I've had a lot of people do that to me. And I'm short-baited versus

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had it too. And, you know, something I've been in the space for a long time.

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I've had people do that. And what is of happening is that you just kind of burn

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your reputation. And, you know, what's going to happen is somebody who's taken

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a massive, you know, swipe at me, you know, they're going to want to do a deal with

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someone else. And that guy's going to call me. And he's going to be like, what do you

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think about this guy? And I'm like, I think he's a little bit, I think he's naive.

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I think he's, I think he's, I think he's new. I think he's small bones. I think he's

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an emotional person. I don't think he's able to restrain himself. I think he's very volatile.

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I wouldn't do business with him if it were me. You can do whatever you want. And I would

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just be like, this is my experience with it. I would, I don't touch people like that

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with a 10-foot pole, but do what you want. And usually when people hear that, you know,

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from someone that they think is less volatile, they will usually heed that advice.

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And there's been probably a lot of people who have taken tax on me who somehow find things

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that just fall through for them. And that may or may not have been as a result of, you

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know, me. But the point is that I think that that anger, use it to fuel yourself, but

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don't, don't use it to attack. It just doesn't end up going well. And also people make

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associations with how they feel about what you say. And so if you're always talking

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negatively in general about other people, people will not remember who you were talking

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about, but they will remember how you made them feel and they will associate the negativity

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with you. And so that's something that I learned early on in some of the persuasion books

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and I was like, oh, okay, I need to watch off of that. And so it's hard for me, especially

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because I was so angry when I was younger, to not do that. And so that's one side of

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it, right, is if you are climbing the mountain. And I guess the message to the other side is

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that like, it just, you're not going to affect anything. Like you're not going to hurt anyone

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by your success. And that's like, that's probably the biggest message I can give is like,

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you're not going to hurt anyone. Like it's not, like you're not going to hurt anyone.

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Like when people make swipes at me, it's like, it doesn't hurt me. Like it doesn't affect

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me at all. Like it doesn't affect my business. It doesn't, it just, it just affects you.

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And I'm only sharing this because like, it was something that I think really hurt my

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mental well-being when I was younger. And I, and if I can provide value, you know, I hope

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that that doesn't affect those people if they see this. Tony's, and maybe that's you, you

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know, maybe it's, maybe there's a competitor in your space or maybe there's another, you

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know, another business down the street that you're like, screw this guy, blah, blah, blah.

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I can promise you you would make so much more money if you guys just like talked and, and

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shared like best practices because it, there's so few markets where it's actually winner-take-all.

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There's, it's, there's so few, you know what I mean? That it actually works that way

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and it's a zero-sum game. The reality is that most businesses can't even handle the

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amount of demand that there is for the service and the solution that they have, the problem

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that they solve. And the other reality is that there's a lot of people that like things

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solved in different ways. You know, if Leyla and I were entering the weight loss space,

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it's not like I have to start attacking weight watchers, you know what I mean? Like there's

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just certain people who are attracted to that type of messaging. And if Leyla and I got

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it in that space, we probably have a very different angle, brand message look and feel than

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they would. And we would attract different types of people with different values. And so

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it's, there's a lot of room and the ocean's very, very big. It's so much bigger than everyone

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gives it credit for. And that's, I think I told a story recently about a competitor,

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quote, competitor, another, another company in our space who's, who's doing this like the

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same amount as we are. And they're not even, they're not even like marketing on Facebook.

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And I'm like, are you kidding me? And they have an entire outbound team. And when I heard

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that, I was just like, gosh, I just like, I continue to have my mental barriers stretched

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around these concepts of like, if the game is so big, and the only person you hurt when

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you spit hate is yourself. You hurt your long term prospects because people at the top

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do talk. Like, it's it. Like, there definitely is like, I think I heard Andy for Solace

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say this. It's like, everyone at top is just like hanging out. Like they're all just like

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most of us know each other, you know what I mean? And like we text each other and hey, how's

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this working for you? Hey, how's this work? Like there's no animosity. Like I'm friends

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with a lot of people who are in the gym space who serve gym owners. Like I have no malicious

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intent. If someone's like, hey, should I work with someone? I'm like, give them a shot.

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You know what I mean? Like everyone has a different way of doing things. Um, you know,

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this is what ours works well with. And if you like our style and you like, you know,

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you like selling hard, you like going high ticket, you like marketing hard. Uh, you like

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focusing on metrics. Like that's us. You know what I mean? Like there's people who are

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like more done for use that, like that's cool too. Like there's guys who do that really

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well. So anyways, I wanted to share this with you because Ed inspired me to share this

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message with you because, um, if you, you know, if you are angry or you have this anger

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inside of yourself, I 100% get you. I feel you. Um, but I would just say try and use it

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to spur yourself on. Do not use it to throw shade because it will not benefit your well-being

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and it won't benefit your long-term success. So anyways, um, hope you found that valuable.

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Hope you enjoyed this. Um, if you did, leave a like or comment or review or just, uh,

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listen solemnly. Uh, but anyways, hope you have an awesome day and a happy Saturday and I'll

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catch you guys soon. Bye!