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been some of the keys to our continued growth and success.

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Welcome to the game where we talk about how to get more customers,

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how to make more customers, how to keep them longer,

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and the many failures and lessons we have learned along the way.

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Hope you enjoy and subscribe.

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Good morning. Happy Saturday.

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I'm really excited for this podcast video

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because I've actually had this concept on my mind,

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this piece.

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Probably for the last two and a half weeks,

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I feel like it's been like in the back of my mind,

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like percolating and whatnot.

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And it's combining with like four or five other ones

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and I felt that this morning as I was eating breakfast,

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I was like, all right, today's the day I'm going to make it.

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So I recently wanted to call this why I don't go home for the holidays.

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And there's probably going to be some things that I say

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that are a little bit controversial,

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but there are things that have absolutely been some of the keys

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to continuing growth and success.

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And I thought you might want to hear them.

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And so I put the title as this for at least for right now

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as success equals ingrained intolerance.

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And so one of the reasons that I don't go home for the holidays

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is that a lot of people haven't grown since I left, right?

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They haven't had 10 years of growth.

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They've lived the same six months 20 times, right, since I was gone.

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And when I go back, they want to meet me in my past.

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And so they want to speak things over me that aren't who I am anymore.

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And then because it's difficult for them to, to, to,

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to, uh, the word, uh, connect, right?

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The, their perception of who I used to be

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and who the person is standing in front of them,

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how they're reconciled.

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Thank you.

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Uh, reconciling those two things is really difficult

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for a lot of people because it's breaking the box they want to put you in.

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But the reality is that most people don't change.

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Entrepreneurs do because we have to, right?

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We call it growth instead of change, but for the outside world,

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for the non entrepreneurs who stay in their same box every day,

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it's, it's hard to calculate.

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And so I'll go home and they'll say,

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oh, like my dad says that.

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So say, you have a, you have the shortest fuse out of anyone.

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You just have such a short temper and anyone who is in our company,

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my wife, like, I mean, anyone who knows me and spends time with me

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would probably not say that.

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And, and so I will be, I mean, very aggressive in combating that immediately

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because I'll be like, don't speak that over me.

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That's not true.

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That's not who I am.

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And it makes people really uncomfortable.

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And so there's a lot of times if I go see an uncle,

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you know what I mean?

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If I'm at a holiday event and then they're like, oh, Alexander,

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you've always been a little bit loose with the alcohol.

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Like, I don't even drink anymore.

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You know what I mean?

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Like you're speaking about my past.

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And it makes people really uncomfortable.

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And I would implore you to meet those things head on.

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And the reason that I don't like going home for the holidays

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because I have to be on guard because when I, when I leave,

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I feel like I have to like wash myself of the things that people

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were trying to speak over me.

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And it's constant.

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It's un, it's unending.

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It's incessant.

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Right?

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They're constantly trying to put me back in the box that makes sense to them.

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Right?

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And I refuse to have that happen.

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And so when I have these conversations, it's passing comments.

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It's little things.

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It's never, because most people aren't confrontational.

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Right?

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And so it's never, oh, like, you are like, you know what I mean?

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Like, it's, it's not like that.

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Oh, you know how you always are.

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And they'll say it even with like a smile, like it's, like it's a good thing.

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But like, you have to catch it because you know how it makes you feel when you hear it.

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So you're like, that's not true.

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That's not me.

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Right?

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I'm done with that.

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That's in my past.

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Right?

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And so like this is who I am.

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And so I have to take like a week to detangle.

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And then basically, we speak over the things that I am or that I choose to be.

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Right?

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And so it's one of the main reasons that I don't go back for the holidays.

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And I really, really don't like it.

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And I definitely don't like spending any portion of extended time there is because it feels like I'm going backwards.

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And, and what, you know, what we are all as a community trying to accomplish is not normal.

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And we just have to come to terms with the fact that it isn't normal.

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It's okay that it's not normal.

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But it also means that normal people aren't going to like it.

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Right?

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And so like the higher up we go in business, I think at least this is just my subjective understanding.

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How I'm, how I'm perceiving it as I go through it.

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The more intolerant we become of people who try and I mean, it's even tones.

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Like I'll be like, don't speak to me in that tone.

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Even if they're saying the right thing, I'm like, it seems disrespectful.

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It bothers me.

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And like you become more and more aware because you're like, let me teach you how to treat me.

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Right?

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And sometimes you have to do that.

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And especially when it's been a long period of time, you have to teach people how you like to be treated now.

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And a lot of times it's a lot different than it was when they first met you.

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Right?

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And it's the hardest with family because I'll be really real with you.

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There's a lot of people that I'm connected with that I probably would never see again if I didn't have a blood relation.

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And I manage our space very well.

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And so if we, you know, if we go back, it's only going to be for a short period of time because there's no other reason besides the fact that we share biological bond that I would ever see you.

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Because you have, you don't have the same goals.

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You don't have the same values.

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You don't want to do the things I want to do.

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When we see each other, you make me feel worse.

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Why would I see?

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Right?

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Just being very real with you guys.

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And maybe this is something that I'll look back at this video.

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Five years from now and I'll have grown more and I'll have more perspective.

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But that's, that's where we are now.

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Now, total, total pivot.

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Like sometimes, you know what?

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I'm not going to pivot.

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Like I'm going to, I'm going to dive a little deeper in this.

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Hopefully you guys don't mind.

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Like being so intolerant of this stuff is like, is so key to being able to like grow.

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I'm telling you because, and that's why, that's why there's, we keep such quiet space, right?

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Because it's like the only place that you don't have to have your guard up constantly.

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Fending off with other people are trying to tell you about yourself.

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Right?

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And so you can kind of build it while it's while it's in its infancy.

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You're not as strong yet in these new attributes that you're trying to have.

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Going to a high level entrepreneur yesterday, right?

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And he's like, ah, I mean, I'm just horrible at details.

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And I was like, don't speak that over yourself.

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I was like, because your business might need you to be good at details when you go from 10 to 20 million.

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Right?

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Don't say that.

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And he was like, you're right.

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I was like, yeah, you choose, you're choosing to not be good at details.

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Right?

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Do you really think that if your kids were going to die because you need to learn to remember things to be able to do it?

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I'm like, all right, then you're choosing not to be good at it.

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That's your choice.

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That's your belief.

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Right?

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And so like, if you identify these things like, man, I'm getting really deep on this.

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I know.

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But like the identity is so fluid.

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Like, we can change in an instant.

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Like Tony Robbins talks about this stuff all the time.

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Like, we can, like, the only moment that we're actually believing is right now.

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Right?

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And so all of the things that we had before us are only stories that we can either choose to replay

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because they're positive attributes or choose to ignore if they're negative attributes.

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And a lot of us just stay in these loops of speaking these things over ourselves that don't even serve us.

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Right?

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One of my favorite sayings in the world, probably one of my favorites, like one of the most profound sayings is

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we question all of our beliefs, except for those that we truly believe and those we never question at all.

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And I always, I love that because it just makes you aware.

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Like, I love catching myself on a belief that I've always had that I believe so thoroughly

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that I never actually thought to question it because that's how much I believed it.

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Right?

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It's just been there.

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And so like the higher up we go the more we kind of uncover these beliefs about what's possible?

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What can we do?

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How can we grow?

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How quickly can change happen?

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Right?

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I mean, if you look at our business, hopefully you're as enjoying Saturday morning with me.

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So if you look at our business, right?

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Like, we pivoted from a done 40 model to the done with you model that we have now in April of 2017.

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Right?

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And so from April of 2017 until today, right?

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That's like 19 months, I think.

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Right?

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We've gone from zero to arguably the biggest company in the brick and mortar chain fitness world.

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And we're like two or three times the size of anyone else who's like the second runner up.

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And 2019, we're going to probably three to four X that I can say that pretty with a lot of certainty.

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And so like, how quickly are you able to achieve what you want to achieve?

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Is it supposed to take a year because you're choosing to believe that it's supposed to take a year?

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Right?

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How quickly can you onboard someone?

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Let me give you another story.

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I was, so we're about to do a very big launch for our legacy group.

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I can't tell you what it is.

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But a friend of mine launched a new service category in his business.

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And it blew up overnight.

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He had a huge explosion of traffic.

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He was running like some ads and they just took off.

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Right?

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He couldn't do anything about it.

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And so he hired 30 people in 14 days, first customer service team, 30 people in 14 days, right?

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And so when we had our Q4 planning, right?

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Our fourth quarter planning.

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We had our customer service director.

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And I literally I love you to death.

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It has nothing to do.

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But like this was what happened during the during the actual meeting.

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She was like, I feel comfortable saying that I can bring four people on every month between now and X launch date, right?

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Which would, you know, get us to probably 16 or so people 16 to 20, right?

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By the launch date, which is going to be like three or four months away.

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And so then I told that story about my friend who had just done this.

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He hired 30 people in 14 days.

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Because he had to, right?

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And so a lot of times the necessity is one of the biggest things that allows us to break our beliefs because we have to.

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We have no other choice.

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Real quick guys, you guys already know that I don't run any ads on this.

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And I don't sell anything.

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And so the only ask that I can ever have are you guys that you help me spread the words we cannot more entrepreneurs.

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Make more money, feed their families, make better products, and have better experiences for their employees and customers.

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And the only way we do that is if you can rate and review and share this podcast.

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So the single thing that I asked you to do is you can just leave a review, take 10 seconds or one type of the thug.

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It means the absolute world to me and more importantly, it may change the world for someone else.

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Right? And so I love thinking, and that's why when we have scripts and whatnot and the show rates double based on the fact that you know you actually are going to leave a location

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and you're not going to be able to sell that person the tonality of how you're speaking to the prospect, even though the words are the same.

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The fact that it's just what you believe that changes the outcome and the influence on the other person is like so cool to me.

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And so the question is like how can we trick ourselves right into believing what we need to believe in order to grow faster.

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Right? I made this, I did this experiment, you know, three years ago where I put on like 35 pounds of muscle in six weeks, right?

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And I started and they asked me to write an article, it was muscle strength, and I did it natural if you can choose to believe you're not, but I did.

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And it was, it was 35 pounds of muscle, but it was 35 pounds and there are a lot of it was muscle within six weeks.

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And I started the article off by saying like what if you actually had to gain 35 pounds in six weeks and get and add a hundred pounds to your, you're bad told what you do, right?

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And so I try to put this conf, like these confines on myself and I was like I probably wouldn't just lift, you know, twice a week, right? For that lift, I probably lifted like once or twice a day.

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And then that's what I did. And then I got really, really strong, really fast. I added a hundred pounds to my pension six weeks.

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And I was natural, right? And I did that because the confines, like the confines that we put ourselves in there. And so sometimes I wonder like what things are we allowing to be spoken over ourselves by others first.

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And then second, what things are we speaking over ourselves that we don't even know that we're doing.

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And so constantly questioning like those things that we speak over ourselves has been honestly one of the biggest things that has allowed us to grow.

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And so I know that I haven't been as tactful in the last few content videos. I hope you guys don't mind.

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It's just in what's on my mind.

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We had Chris and Robin Barnett who flew out here because they won a competition that we were holding in secret.

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And anyway, so Chris and Robin Barnett came out and they were like, we feel like we're stuck, right? We feel like we're in a bottleneck.

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And like we just can't, we're just trying to break through.

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And when I talked to them about it, the whole time they were here for the whole day, I didn't tell them a single tactical thing to do differently with their business, not one.

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So what we identified was the things that they were speaking over themselves and the things that they were choosing to believe about how quickly things can happen, right?

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And so I'll give you an example. I hope they don't mind.

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Robin is Chris's wife.

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Didn't want to be in the gym anymore. She's like, it's not my passion. You know, like I kind of like now we're comfortable.

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Like I kind of want to do my own thing.

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So, and he was causing some strife in their relationship, mostly because like, you know, she felt, you know, betrothed him that she had to keep doing it, but then he felt guilty that you know, I mean, there's just kind of both sides of it, right?

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And so they were like, well, we're going to let Robin go, you know, she's going to leave in four months, right? So we're going to give four months.

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And then she'll get out of the business and I was like, well, why does she just get out today?

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Like she doesn't want to do it. You don't want her there. Like why don't you just get out today? Like why are you choosing to believe that it needs to take four months?

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You know, like I guess it doesn't. I was like, right?

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And so a lot of times like, I've just, this has just been recently for me. I've had a lot of conversations with guys who are doing five to 12 million a year in their businesses.

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And a lot of them have been doing this a lot longer than me. And they're like, how are you freaking grown? So like, how are you hitting the numbers?

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You're hitting how is the growth rate that you guys are having? Like how's it possible? Right?

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And like we've really just like, I'm trying not to be weird about this, but like we've just chosen to believe it's possible.

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Right? We've really just chosen to believe it's possible. And a lot of times like, if you talk to them and like you look at it,

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it's like, you see these guys who are really, really, really high up in the business world. A lot of times I do talk very non tactical, very much mindset stuff.

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And I think it's, and I used to really not appreciate it. But now I think I'm appreciating a little bit more because the reason that a lot of people aren't successful is because of the beliefs that they have.

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Because if you can remove and break those beliefs, a lot of times they will go find the tactics that are necessary, right? To win.

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And so, and the higher up you go, like the cleaner people keep their space. And the reason they do that, the reason they keep it so quiet is so that they can pinpoint anything that comes in their area, right?

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Anything that's going to break or chip at them or just like bother them in any way, they keep this bubble around them.

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And then what that does though is that it gives them such clean perspective and clean vision on what's going on. Because a lot of times when I had these guys, like I said,

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who are doing, you know, five, six, 10 million a year and they're like, what's going on? It becomes really obvious. It's really apparent.

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I'll give you another example I had yesterday. I talked to a guy who's doing, he's doing half a million a month right now.

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And he has a split between two businesses. He's got one business that's like 400,000 a month. He's got one that does 100,000 a month.

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And he's like, well, the big, you know, the $400,000 a month business is my old business. It's the one that it's, it's got all the complexity and hate the customer.

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All this stuff, right? And then he's like, and then this business is really simple. It's super profitable. I'm running like three times the margin I run in that business.

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And, and he's like, so I just, I just can't figure out a group. And I was like, do you really can't figure out a girl?

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He's like, yeah, I just like, I got so much stuff going on. And I was like, yeah, you should probably just get rid of the thing that is a big headache for you

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and do the thing that you really like doing. I was like, do you think if you got rid of all of the attention that that 400,000 a month thing is sucking up, you'd be able to double the 100,000 a month thing. He's like, yeah, like easy.

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And I was like, cool. Then why don't you do that? Right. And it becomes really apparent and obvious to you on the outside.

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Like, I mean, these guys aren't dumb. You know what I mean? He's doing six million a year. Like he's not stupid. It's just the beliefs that we truly believe are the ones that we don't see.

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Right. And so it's really interesting. And like, I think all the time about like, I want to be wiser. I want to have more discernment.

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And if you really, if you start to dissect, like, what is wisdom, right? Wisdom is being able to see is the two people are looking at the same situation.

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The wiser person sees things that the other person doesn't. And so it's, it's vision. It's being able to see what other people don't see.

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And a lot of times they're just unseen chains that people have already choose and to tie themselves up with. Right. And we're having a lot of gem owners.

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I've had just recently a string of gem owners who you're stopping like, man, we're just stuck at 60,000 a month. Like, I don't know what this bottleneck is.

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And I always respond. I'm like, it's not the business model. Right. It's you. And it's, and it's, and I should probably respond more specifically.

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It's a belief that you have that you have an identified that's holding you back.

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A lot of times it's just because you're choosing to make less money. Like, no joke. A lot of people choose to make less money.

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So people like, we have gem owners right now who are asked like, hey, like, I've got this campaign. It's crushing it.

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I think I'm going to turn it off for next month. Right. Because like, we have a lot going on. I'm like, if you want to choose to make less money, that's your choice.

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So, and so we make these choices. Like, if you, if you order articulate them differently, you probably think they were ridiculous.

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And I had every conversation I've had just in the last two, I start to talk to four entrepreneurs last two weeks that are doing five million or more per year.

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And each one of the conversations ended with like, well, when you put it like that, I sound like an idiot. And I was like, well, are you?

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It's like, well, no. And I was like, then you should probably change the way you're doing it. Right. And so it's just these emotions and these beliefs that get in our way.

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Of like, what is seems so obvious and it's just because some, we are emotional beings, right. We are. We make decisions with emotions and we try and logic it later.

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But when you look at things logically a lot of times, some of the, some of the, the answers are obvious. Right.

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Well, I've got this trainer that I've had for two years, but they're such a pain. They never want to do anything of anything that's new.

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But I have some clients that that's still like them. Okay.

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Do you think that if you had a new trainer that was like bought in that you would be able to grow more.

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So, red it is is the fear of losing these few clients that are attached to this one trainer is outweighing the potential growth you would have from the key player that you know you need in order to make them all work.

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Right. And then when it's phrased that way, it becomes obvious. Yeah, I got to let them go.

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But you don't have the perspective yet. And so sometimes you just need someone on the outside.

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But anyways, guys, thank you for spending Saturday morning with me. This was just something that was on my mind. And I just like, it was like stirring me.

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But be mindful of the things that speak people speak over you and the tone that they do it. And just like, if you feel weird after someone says something, stop the conversation.

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Catch it and then address it and be like, please don't speak to me like that.

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Please don't say those things about me. It really bothers me. I'm really working on this where I've worked a lot on this.

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And I don't I don't appreciate it. It really bothers me.

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And if that person cares about you, they will change. And if they don't get them out of your life, you don't need that. Right.

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And and the most important person to make sure that you're doing that, which is you.

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Like if you're the one who's saying, man, I'm just not good at details. Man, I'm just I hate employees. Good luck running a business.

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Like I hear some like these are things I over here, even in our group, like, oh, I've closed your idiots. Like do you really think that that is a good belief to grow and repeat inside of yourself.

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If you want to grow and scale a business, probably not. Right. Like be mindful of things that you're saying because.

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And then ask yourself, like does this belief serve me and if it doesn't get rid of it. So anyways, I hope you guys have an amazing weekend.

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I love you all. Thank you guys for for for giving me your attention. I know it's your most valuable resource. So thank you.

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I hope I gave you a good return on it. And I hope you guys have an amazing amazing day. All right. That's a love.

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.